About the dishwasher?

[Sahkoora]

To cut a long story short, DH has said he doesn't want me putting pots/pans/oven dishes etc in the dishwasher any more.

He thinks the grease from them stops the dishwasher from working properly as it clogs up the grease trap, meaning he has to take it apart a bit and clean it all out. This is a job that took him about half an hour, and in the two years we have owned our dishwasher, he's had to do it twice.

But to prevent this hardship, I now have to wash them all up by hand, every day.

Was IBU to suggest he do this washing up in the evenings while I do the kids' bedtime? I made this suggestion and then left the pots and pans for him after loading the dishwasher. They were summarily ignored for 3 days so he could go out with friends/go for a run/watch the snooker in the evening. In the end I put them in the dishwasher anyway.

He works hard at a physical job, and I am a SAHM, so I do the lion's share of the housework, but I have 2 kids with SN and a 6 month old baby, which is a 24/7 job at the moment. I really do hate washing up though, so I might have lost perspective on this a bit!

I had a new dishwasher installed last week by a nice man. He told me to clean the grease filter once a week. Then it would only take 5 mins not 30.

I have used ones that you prop up in the bit that holds plates on the bottom

I'd do what everyone else suggests and just lie. We've got knives and pans that dh has said don't put in the dishwasher. I just wait till he's out and then stick them in. He is none the wiser and the knives and pans are fine. If I didn't do that they would just stay by the sink till I could be bothered to wash them up.

Think it's brands you pop up in the plate bit. Store brands I have seen have to go in the cutlery basket.

I would keep putting pots etc into the dishwasher (unless he did them himself) and I would absolutely not lie about it. Why should he get to make the rules.

Probably a good idea to learn how to clean out the filter, it's not difficult. We tend to chuck everything into our dishwasher. Every now and then the dishwasher throws a wobbly and we clean out the filter and/or run a cleaning wash.

EdithWeston: our dishwasher also has a cutlery tray, we put the cleaning wash bottle on one of the plate rack thingies.

I would absolutely not be dictated to like that. He is saying have a dog and bark yourself. If he wants pots, pans and ovenware to be handwashed all the time then fine, he can do them all himself. Every day.

I soak greasy pots and pans in hot soapy water just while we eat, then they go in, as many of them as there is room for after all our crockery and cutlery. The only ones I never put in are my non-stick frying pan and wok as I have found the dishwasher not great for non-stick stuff in the past. It has come out a little less non-stick each time than when it went in, so I hand wash that. That is the only rule though.

As for cleaning out the filters, all I do is run mine under the hot tap once a week to get all gunk out. It takes about a minute or two. What on earth is your husband actually doing? Washing each tiny hole in the mesh separately?

At the end of each month I put dishwasher cleaner in it. No bother at all.