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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think that you shouldn't buy a huge 4X4 if you cannot reverse it?

111 replies

MythicalKings · 30/04/2015 07:35

DH and I went to a National Trust house yesterday. It's accessed down a narrow twisty lane with a few passing places. We go there a lot so know the road well.

We came round the corner and there was a 4X4 coming towards us. Our nearest passing place was more than half a mile back and we knew there was one 150 yards or so behind the 4X4 so we waited for the driver to reverse. She just sat there. So did we.

When she realised we weren't moving she gestured to us to reverse. DH stuck his head out of the window and said there was a passing place not far behind her and the one behind us was considerably further away. She said that wasn't so but DH pointed to where it could just be seen. She started to reverse and went into the bank, a few further fumbles ensued before she stopped and said she couldn't reverse her car so we'd have to.

So we did. But why on earth would anyone buy a car that they can't drive properly? Not wanting to drip feed so I'll point out it was obvious from the paint job that it was her car and not the family car that she didn't usually drive.

OP posts:

TheWitTank · 30/04/2015 09:24

I find big 4x4 vehicles/vans much easier to reverse than little cars. Visibility is much better with the height and mirror size. I drive many cars daily at work; industrial, sports, super, family. I feel most comfortable and confident in a large 4x4 (think L200 or navara size). I don't think it's the size of the vehicle, it's the general skill.

HappenstanceMarmite · 30/04/2015 09:38

I think it is the shape of a car rather than the size which affects how well I can reverse. Anything boxy - fine. Bevelled back - takes far more concentration from me.

^This is true. I drive a long low coupe and the visibility is quite restricted because of the length of back and bonnet vs height of cabin.

no73 · 30/04/2015 09:42

I'm shit at reversing anything whether big or small, always have been. Is still do it though but I make a right arse of myself. I'm hardly dangerous though!

Momagain1 · 30/04/2015 09:42

My husband cannot reverse, or park. As in pull sensibly into a parking space, in one easy motion, resulting in approx even space on either side. When we lived in the UK before, and I didnt drive, (after years of me being the car owner and main driver in the US) i was regularly mortified as he took 10 minutes, holding up entire parking garages of traffic, inching in, reversing and inching out when he realised he was at the wrong angle, not backing out enough to correct this, making it worse, in fact. In the end, I would have to climb over to his side to get out as their would be 2 or 3 cm between ours and the next on my side. Once he had to open the hatch and reach over the seat to get ds out of the baby seat!

Keep in mind too, I was driving a large American station wagon about twice the length of the Fiesta he bought here and a bit wider as well.

He moans about my accident rate: I have rear-ended about 1 car a decade since getting my license. Actual accidents due to weather or failure to compensate for my own or another drivers unexpected error. He, after much twisting and turning to look all around to note such things, he has run into stationary cars, smushed the bumper into barriers and backed in huge cement columns at least twice as often!

GiddyOnZackHunt · 30/04/2015 09:43

I used to work with a woman who drove a Fiesta and had no reversing skills at all. Every morning there would be grand prix style overtaking on the road to the car park as everyone tried to avoid being stuck behind her as she spent 15 minutes trying to park her car.

Momagain1 · 30/04/2015 09:50

Mrspuddle if you know you can't, why dont you go practice somewhere as TheFnoz plans to do? If you live in town, you might have to go a distance to find a relatively empty parking area to do so, but why would you carry on being a hazard to your family and others?

FlaviaAlbia · 30/04/2015 09:52

I suppose it's what you're used to doing really, if you don't reverse much you'll get out of practice no matter what you drive.

I'm really good at reversing around a corner uphill because that's how I had to get out of my gran's house but I'm terrible at parallel parking because I haven't really done it since I've passed my test, there's nowhere I drive to that I need to park like that. On the other hand, my friend is the worlds most timid driver and she can parallel park in a matchbox sized space because she has to do it twice a day.

Houseworkavoider · 30/04/2015 10:02

I was rubbish at reversing for the first year after passing my test!
I'm fab now and always show patina and understanding to those who struggle. I doubt they're doing it on purpose.
I remember a couple of years ago, a man was giving me grief in a car park for not parking fast enough. I wasn't holding him or anyone else up. Unfortunately for him, Dh was meeting me there and saw the whole thing. Words we're had and the chap left with his tail between his legs. I still get worried in car parks despite being perfectly able to park.
A friendly wave and a smile goes a long way imo. if the other driver point blank refuses to even try, you can't do much about it. Just be pleased that you are sensible enough to manage and give them a

mrspuddleduckie · 30/04/2015 10:04

Momagain

I said "so I just have to hope that people are forgiving when I take several attempts to park or am slow at reversing"

taking a couple of attempts to park at the supermarket or reversing slowly on a country lane is not me being a hazard to my family or others. I'm just acknowledging that I find it hard and I'm a bit crap.

I'm neither dangerous or obstructive. I will reverse, it just won't be very quick or fluid.

I could practise, but I'd rather spend my (very little) free time doing something fun. I'm not dangerous, after all.

Skeppers · 30/04/2015 10:05

I don't think it's limited to 4x4s.

I had to sit and wait for 10 minutes yesterday (sadly, I'm not even exaggerating) to pull out of a parking space because the driver next to me took FIFTEEN (again, no exaggeration, I counted) attempts to reverse park in the adjacent space. She could have parked a bus in there, to be honest.

And she had the gall to give ME the evils when she eventually parked (albeit diagonally) and I then pulled out of my space. If she'd just let me go in the first place it would have made her parking a lot easier. She must have seen me waiting to leave!

It's not the car, it's just idiot drivers.

Skeppers · 30/04/2015 10:07

(Just to add, I can reverse my car perfectly well but- for some reason- I am absolutely shit at reverse parking. That's why I never do it; I just drive straight in!)

MajesticWhine · 30/04/2015 10:07

I couldn't reverse out of my own drive the other day. I was in all kinds of a fluster. I have a mini. Good job I didn't buy that landrover discovery we were looking at...

Original poster

MythicalKings · 30/04/2015 10:09

You would be dangerous if an emergency vehicle was waiting to get past you, though, and a house burnt down while you were being careful.

OP posts:

mrspuddleduckie · 30/04/2015 10:11

Actually, I have scraped my car getting out of the way of an ambulance before. I'm not nit-picking (honest!) but just wanted to say I wouldn't be precious about damaging it in an emergency

Caboodle · 30/04/2015 10:13

4x4 we have is a doddle to park....high up, fab visibility. It has a shocking turning circle though. I had very valid reasons for having it...can't afford to replace now. I am a bit cat's bum face at the general attitude to 4x4 drivers though. Ime it's the drivers of small cars who are rubbish and just cannot seem to get that small vehicle in the relatively huge space at the supermarket.

DrDre · 30/04/2015 10:22

At work once we saw someone take about three attempts to park their car in a space in an empty car park when they were driving forwards! If you can't get your car where it needs to go when you are driving forwards you shouldn't be on the road.

kungfupannda · 30/04/2015 10:33

Try living down our country lanes. People who drive massive cars never seem to be able to reverse them. I had one yesterday when trying to get home. Woman in 4x4 who came through the 20mph village at ridiculous speed and overshot the passing place right by our drive - we're right on the edge of the village so people seem to accelerate out, despite the fact that it's on a blind bend. We came face to face and she clearly expected me to reverse back through 2 bends and into a tight passing place about 100 yards back, despite the massive one just behind her. I indicated that I was turning off so she'd only have to back up a few feet. She made a half-hearted attempt and then gave up. I waited. Another half-hearted attempt with much revving and head-shaking. She eventually reversed into the hedge and then mouthed things and shook her head at me as I squeezed the few feet into my drive.

I've got hard-core since the long-running saga of the non-reversing woman which some people might remember

It's funny how vans and trucks and farm vehicles managed to navigate the lanes just fine, but people in shiny 4x4s seem entirely unaware that they can actually go backwards. Or sideways for that matter.

Skeppers · 30/04/2015 10:45

If anyone wants some real non-reversing fun, visit the Isle of Wight during peak tourist season. The locals are all perfectly able and happy to reverse to the nearest passing point if it's nearer to them. Not so the overners. My mum had a 20 minute stand off with someone once on a narrow lane. Someone upthread mentioned getting a flask and book out? That's basically what she did.

MissPenelopeLumawoo2 · 30/04/2015 10:52

The Mazda just won't go in a straight line backwards. I can manoeuvre the other two easily and park the 4x4 in micro spaces in one go but the damned Mazda is really hard to get right.

We got rid of our Mazda for this very reason!

oddfodd · 30/04/2015 11:07

I find men are often fairly arsey about reversing. I'm not sure if it's that they can't - they just don't want to reverse for a woman. Something to do with backing down or something? It's very irritating.

Original poster

MythicalKings · 30/04/2015 11:08

The person nearest the passing place should reverse, whatever sex they are.

OP posts:

mrspuddleduckie · 30/04/2015 11:21

But isn't there also a rule about uphill/downhill as well? I'm sure my driving instructor told me you should always reverse if the other person is driving uphill, even if you have to go a bit further?

BooChunky · 30/04/2015 11:23

This could be about me. I can't reverse.. (Or park in general to be honest) If I can't go into a space forwards I've been known to go home.

God knows how I passed my driving test. I always say they must've had a quota to fill.

Dionysuss · 30/04/2015 11:26

My sister has a polo and can't park it. She will avoid going to places if there isn't a huge empty carpark. IMO she shouldn't be on the road. Similarly my mil will not drive in the city, or to unknown places as she can't drive and look out for road signs

VivaLeBeaver · 30/04/2015 11:29

Problem is some people wouldn't be able to reverse no matter the size of their car. I came across a bloke on a country lane in Wales once in a little Punto. He was terrified by the thin mountain road with a big drop one side. Nowhere to turn round and he couldn't reverse. I ended up having to reverse it for him.

Some twat in a Range Rover reversed into the side of me once. He was amazed I was there and said he couldn't see when he reversed! Apparantly he'd only just got it back from the garage after doing the same a few weeks earlier. Oh and he was reversing outside a primary school at drop off time. He's lucky he didn't mow a child down.

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