To think I have peed two people off today just by being assertive?

[WhyDoIBotherBothering]

Firstly I went to the school for collection and went and stood with two friends of mine who were deep in conversation. they both looked at me and didn't say hello even though I said hello to them so I just walked off and collected DD. One of my friends has now sent a text asking why I walked off in a huff (I didn't, I just walked off as I was being ignored).

Also another friend was meant to pop to my house today for a coffee but she didn't turn up. I have just had a text from her saying that she forgot to come round but that she'd come tomorrow instead. I said that I'm going out tomorrow so I will see her next week and she just sent a text back saying "OK" when normally her style is very friendly and gushing, so she is clearly in a bit of a strop about it.

Whenever I act assertively my friends don't like it.

I think you were being abit unreasonable in the first situation. As you say they were deep in conversation so I think it's abit rude to expect them to drop it. Personally I would have waited next to them or in the circle and waited for a natural gap in conversation to say hello.

Second one your friend is being unreasonable and should not have expected you would just be free all week waiting for her!

I didn't expect them to drop it,a hello would have been nice though. If I was in conversation with one of them and another of them came along they would be included

I don't see how you were assertive in either case really first one, they were busy. Second one, you offered a date that works for you.

Ok well then I've pissed them off by a) not wanting to stand there like a lemon whilst they looked at me and didn't have the manners to say hello and b) by not being available 24/7 for when my friend decides to just drop in.

You weren't assertive. A wave in the first case would've been fine until they were finished

I did wave, and smile. They both looked at me. they could have said hello, it's wouldn't have been difficult.

Lordy, quite rude of you to interuppt a conversation that sounded serious. I would have patience and wait until they're done not strop off like a petty child.

Second instance, is it a once off from this friend or is she flaky usually?

It wasn't a serious conversation. It was about bikes. If I am in conversation with one of them and the other comes over they are included in the conversation. I didn't expect them to stop their conversation but a hello would have been nice, just as I would have said hello to them even if having a conversation.

Friend in second scenario is quite flaky. I don't know how that makes a difference though. I genuinely am busy tomorrow.

Hi op, did you have a thread about colleagues going to the pub without you? Sounds like you're feeling a bit raw and letting things get to you. Take care

If I walked up to two of my friends in conversation they would at least acknowledge me, not ignore me. They would probably include me in the conversation although I could then joke about being so far behind it all.

And if your friend thinks so little of you that she 'forgets' your arrangment then she can go whistle.

Good on you, OP. Too many on here can't seem to get off of their high horse. Probably because they are guilty of doing what your 'friends' did. Too full of their own importance (or so they think)

TBH I think you were right on both counts, and I would have done the same, especially with the second friend. Then again I'm an arsey bugger, but life is too short to spend getting trampled on.

From the two scenarios i wouldn't say huffy or assertive. But. Obviously you meant to be huffy rather than assertive (they are different things), or you wouldn't be so cross about it now.