To not want to be dragged onto the dancefloor

[balletnotlacrosse]

Despite my username I am a very self conscious dancer and prefer, at parties and weddings, to sit around chatting and drinking. Some people though seem to be absolutely convinced that anyone who isn't up dancing isn't enjoying themselves or is being a party pooper, and go around trying to drag reluctant people up onto the dance floor.

AIBU to start a thread stating that if people want to get up and dance they will, and if they don't then just leave them bloody alone

And the other one is Frankie by Sister Sledge. The first one is too slow and the second one is too fast and everyone looks like a total arse dancing to either.

Definitely agree, the one bit i didn't like at my wedding was that i felt i had to be out dancing the whole time, because "if the bride isn't dancing no-one will, and it will be a crap party"
I would have been much happier propping up the bar ....

I agree OP.

If I'm happy not dancing, leave me be!

Can't help thinking of this for some reason!

I'd recommend going to weddings in a mobility scooter as nobody ever asks you to dance again once you've run over the mother of the bride's foot!

I don't want to fucking dance, piss off

ought to ensure nobody asks twice
and yanbu. I have no idea why some people appear to think that their idea of fun ought to be universally enforced.

I unwittingly went to an 'Elvis Night' at a local restaurant with a group of friends.

Elvis kept doing the pelvis thing at me and trying to grab my hand and doing the "come and dance" head nod thing. I kept shaking my head and mouthing no. So the sequinned fucker pulled me out of my seat. As I didn't expect this I went arse over tit and landed on the floor. Did he give up on me? Did he bollocks.

I then had to dance with Elvis for what seemed an eternity. He kept spinning me under his arm and as he was Very short and I was over 5ft 9 in heels I had to keep lurching under his arm.

Was a fucking nightmare.

I'm not a fan either. I once dragged myself to a birthday do after an accident where I had painful whiplash- my howl when my friend tried to drag me is well remembered!

I've always hated this and find its usually drunk people doing it. At my own engagement my niece was such pain doing this,wouldn't take no for an answer and trying to physically drag and pull me out of my chair..I had to get stroppy with her to stop. Yes then all the accusations of being a spoil sport and it put a dampner on things.

For years it meant I dreaded the family 'do's' where there was a disco...luckily DH used to warn off anyone who tried to get me up to dance.

I did spend many years going to clubbing events and got into enjoying dancing but then there is a totally different atmosphere and its darker, no pressure to dnace even though its a dance event.

I went to a wedding a few years ago where they had an evening Pig Roast and as it was a lovely night most people spent time on the veranda chatting...the dnace floor was empty everytime I went past

Me too, even if I've been sat there thinking about getting up for a quick dance, anyone trying to drag me up will get a polite "no thanks" although I'm actually thinking "fuck off". By all means ask, I don't mind that at all, but don't grab my hand and pull me and don't persist after I've said no the first time.

I wonder do these 'dance floor draggers' realise the upset, embarassment and humiliation they subject people to with their insistence on forcing people to get up and dance when they quite clearly don't want to.

They've obviously marked themselves down as 'life and soul of the party' types who get the atmosphere going, when actually they're total drags who ruin parties and occasions for loads of people by their tiresome 'only guests who are dancing are having a good time' attitude.

I have a friend whose DH is a fireman and an annoying drunken arse as well. He dances by taking up the entire dance floor and going a little bit crazy, barging into people to the point were I spend my whole time looking around waiting for someone to punch him. His party trick is pick up all the women and throw them over his shoulder in a fireman's lift and run around the dance floor with them looking very much like he's about to drop them on the head, while their skirt is all rucked up around their knickers.

Of course all of the women are supposed to be highly amused and delighted by this, because which one of us doesn't secretly yearn to be given a fireman's lift by a drunken fireman, right? And he's very insistent in the same manner of the dance floor puller.

Wanker.

I once went to a 'dance' themed wedding. The bride was a dance teacher and all the songs were choreographed .

Macarena - check
YMCA - check
Dancing Queen - check
That Saturday Night song - was it Whigfield?

It was just buttock clenchingly awful.

Just her and a few of her students strutting their moves while we all sat immobile with terror clutching wine glasses whilst peering and rummaging into handbags and the men faked heart attacks.

It was all over by 10pm as most of the guests fled. Six of them were playing cards in another room.

We actually fled when the bride stalked over to our table of twelve and called us 'boring bastards'.

A wedding I was dragged to kicking and screaming BTW. I had seen her in action before.

My mum could be a bit like this, trying to drag people onto the dance floor. I hate it, only getting up now and again when I want to.

It took a firm word with her that dancing is best left to individual choice before she left me and others alone at parties.

But yes, there is a group of people who seem to believe having everyone dancing is the mark of a proper party.

Definitely not BU.

Quite honestly, if you've already said a polite "no thanks", then I think any form of verbal or physical response is quite justified in order to get them to fuck off and leave you alone.

Once word spreads, others tend to be more wary of trying it as well. Bonus.

ROFL @ Woobeedoo and the 'sequinned fucker' Elvis impersonator

I would like to have seen that

Does anyone remember that awful awful oops upside your head dance? No way am I crawling about on the floor, hitching up my dress and wrapping my legs around anyone.

I can never do those mass dances anyway. That Cha cha slide is my idea of hell esp as after a few gins I can't be relied upon to actually know my left from my right in any coherent order. Sod that.

Precisely the reason why we didn't have an Evening Do at our wedding! Hardly any of our family or friends are dancers and we detest the enforced jolity of being dragged by some over-enthusiastic relative onto the dancefloor... And the thought of having to do a first dance with everyone watching... Just no.

DH used to be a mobile DJ and told me all sorts of tales about the parties he worked at!
He told me about one where the mother of the bride did the whole dragging people up thing and then physically prevented them from sitting down again.
There were quite a few do's he did (mainly weddings) where he wondered why they needed a dj at all when it was obvious that everyone wanted to just sit and chat - including the newlyweds. He would put quieter music on until the drunkest person in the room came and berated him for not encouraging everyone to dance..

Poor sod, before he quit he would start to get rather anxious about whether people were actually enjoying themselves at all - more than once nobody would dance all night, he would text me worrying then at the end of the night he would be mobbed by guests telling him what a great job he'd done

YANBU I am happy to dance around the house with my kids and, when they were younger, would put myself through the torment of the dance floor for their sake but I HATE dancing publicly and always have.

And, yes, the undercurrent of "boring" really pisses me off. I get a lot of pleasure watching others others have fun and, to some extent, envy their inhibitions to dance. But I feel awkward, stupid and clunky so it's NOT fun!

one of the only up sides of a brain haemorrhage at 30 years old is that no-one who knows me will try to make me dance in public at these things any more. threatening to whack anyone else who doesn't know me that well with my walking stick has usually stopped others :)

No dancing at our wedding either. It can be done well, we went to a great wedding recently where there was a DJ and dance floor, but the partition to the adjoining room where the meal had been was opened up to to make one big room half dance floor, half tables so no obligation to dance.

I've been on "how to organise wedding" threads where people have said make sure there's no separate area away from the dance floor as it kills the atmosphere if people don't dance and have thought "no, it kills the atmosphere if dancing is the only option and you can't chat". I don't actually mind dancing, but I like to have the option of not doing so, especially at weddings and parties where you want to catch up with people you haven't seen for ages.

I was at a wedding once where the dancing was in a separate room from the meal/reception area. Hardly anyone bothered going in there, and were quite happy to sit in the main area chatting.

His party trick is pick up all the women and throw them over his shoulder in a fireman's lift and run around the dance floor with them looking very much like he's about to drop them on the head, while their skirt is all rucked up around their knickers

At some point, someone will throw up down his back, and karma will have asserted itself once again.

I hate this I went to a wedding anniversary party last year and ended up inadvertently partaking in oops upside your head

I feel your pain. And the absolute worst kind of dancing is a crowd of women in a circle and everyone has to take a turn in the centre while the others clap and whoop. Makes me want to curl up and die.