To be pissed off with all this Autism awareness stuff on Facebook etc.

[fixedit]

Let me start by saying I have a daughter with autism and my youngest is showing signs of where we were with dd1 3 years ago. I am so pissed off and probably bitter at seeing all these shit posts about autism awareness from People who have no idea that this condition can affect every aspect of lives. People with children who don't have additional needs and sleep more than 3 hours a night. I'm just ranting I think so no flaming bit it bloody annoys me. I go on Facebook to catch up with friends etc, not be reminded yet again about this thing hanging over our family. I'm probably being unreasonable.

Well even if you were being unreasonable, why shouldn't you be. Who the fuck says when you're under tremendous stress that you have to be reasonable all the time.

for you

Sorry I do this all the time I,m always sharing stuff about autism my five yr old son has autism and learning difficulties I do it because in my mind it might make people think.

I'm with x2boys. I share stuff on autism as and when.

I also post about CP and epilepsy.

I do it in the hope that others will be more understanding of the conditions and the lives that members of my family lead - the person with the conditions and the people caring for the family member with the conditions.

I'm not sure that people who post the stuff even read it. Someone on my feed posted last week to "raise awareness of cancer". Not a specific one, just the disease. Who hasn't heard of cancer?! It can be very frustrating, but I just try and give them the benefit of the doubt and assume that they think they're doing a good deed.

The only people that have shared posts about autism on my Facebook are parents of children with autism. I used to share then but stopped after a parent at the school gates (friend of a friend) told me that she had seen my share and that she could have diagnosed ds3's autism several years before when he was in nursery. I had to tell her it was ds2 who has ASD.

Dd8 has Autism, it has been Autism awareness week recently, that might explain the flurry of posts.

YANBU

are they the sort of posts which end with "Asking all my friends to repost. I know who will" etc etc

April is Autism Awareness Month, i share real life articles that perhaps highlight cases and stories where autistic people have been mistreated, in the vain hope someone will learn and have a little conscience raised in them.

as for the 'don't mess with me, i'm an autism mum' - twee shite that i give a massive wide berth to

YANBU to be pissed off though, autism is a fucker to live with and parent.
It fucks me off when a well-meaning friend shares something like 'watch this autistic child score a goal' etc. Yes, we all celebrate our children's achievements, but it's hard to read when, like you say, you've had 3 hours sleep, cooked the same meal for the umpteenth night running, and can only dream of a holiday in the sun.

DD and DS have HFA - DS is an adult, and i still support him through his daily life like he's much younger.

for you, OP

No, you feel how you feel about it and that's not unreasonable. Or, as Laurie says, if you are BU then you have good reason to be unreasonable.

Eva50: What on earth did the other parent say to that?

I haven't seen the twee stuff yet, Jenny, something to look out for when next hovering on FB.

isnt it always autism awareness week? I think its been autism awareness week according to facebook for about the last 3 years.

(I have 2 boys with autism)

Like Jenny, I don't share the twee shite. The stuff like 'Proud autism mom' (the twee shite is nearly always American in origin, I've noticed). I have shared some links this month, but they were about atypical autism traits in adults and I was talking about my own experiences as someone who strongly suspect they're on the spectrum.

I don't share anything about being a parent of a child on the spectrum, unless it's a status about a small/big achievement like my DC using a hand dryer for the first time. I don't see that as any different to parents talking about their NT children's achievements.

I'm with you on the raising awareness stuff. Like cancer, most people are 'aware', but I think there is a huge difference between 'aware' and 'educated'. Anything I share will always hopefully add to the latter category.

OP, I feel similarly about the 'SN children' posts. I ignore them because they upset me. I know my daughter deserves the same life experiences as everyone else... I don't need fb to remind me, or accuse me of not caring if I don't share. I'm probably BU, but it's how I feel.

if its coming from people with no idea, yanbu. but if its parents, families and pages run by people with kids with autism, yabu.

so no one outside the sn world should share these things? bit odd
(disclaimer i hate all these things)

'children with special needs aren't weird blah blah blah, they just want acceptance...bulls shit, myth perpetuation bollocks, patronising clap trap'

shared by my own 'D'M who still laughs at physically disabled people's walk/gait and thinks DD will grow out of her autism

i'm getting angry at it all again now, OP

we can BU together

I share some stuff on twitter (I don't do fb) bu it tends to either be stuff that tries to look at the funny side of stuff that can be very personally painful, stuffed that is focused on disability rights and law or stuff that provides an interesting perspective from someone actually living it.

Twee, trite tripe gets scrolled past without a second look.

I share stuff on autism but nothing cheesy, things that interest or surprise me or actually give good solid information. I think raising awareness is important. I have two dc with ASD.

I got a message from a friend I haven't seen in ten years telling me he was clueless about autism and what it means till he read some of my posts. That's good enough for me .

Yanbu I have a friend who posts this crap all the time and I just want to post "what the fuck do you know?"

Obviously I don't.

I've posted autism awareness stuff recently with it being autism awareness week/month. I'm selective but I have shared stuff - nowt twee. You'd probably think I'm one of your annoying folk who have no idea if I was your FB friend. Except I have autism myself, which most people don't know.

Peeps share everything on FB. Makes them look like they care.

I have ASD and no one in real life as ever given a shite.

I have autism and don't care whether or not people post messages about autism awareness or not. What I can about is how others think and talk and act with regards to those of us on the spectrum.

I'm tired of having to apologise to other people for having autism. And I'm fed up with the constant refraint (not on MN) but IRL and on other message boards of conversations like thos:

Person1: X said something really tactless to me.
Person2: I'll bet they have autism. People on the spectrum have poor social skills.

Yo, neurotypicals: if you are so great at empathy, how about empathisising with us about what it's like to constabtly be on the receiving end of insulting and derogatory comments?

/bitter and angry

...cooked the same meal for the umpteenth night running
I am so bored with chicken curry, the latest addiction. I think though, I need to be grateful because they all eat it!

YY Croco

I'm not on FB anymore and one of the reasons is mindless awareness re-posts, which perpetuate myths and stereotypes for many things, not just autism. Some are informative but very few IMO. I also find them patronising and actually dehumanising and generalising. I hate my Ds being described as autistic, DS is not autistic he has autism. He is a person first and foremost, not another breed of human.

The word "autistic" implies that autism is a definable entity and it isn't. Autism is a complex neurological condition, no two brains are the same, so no two people with autism will present the same symptoms. The medical profession have no clue either as they are trying to understand signals in the brain that are invisible and we simply don't have the technology to see and understand that type of function.

I'm never upset by the actual people posting this stuff, just the content of the posts. In the main I think people mean well, just most people are ignorant of the realities of autism and they see something and feel they are being helpful by clicking something that says "be aware" or "support autism". I also appreciate it's hard to know what to say or do and unhelpfully I don't have an answer to that either. Unfortunately those of us dealing with Autism are also coming to terms with it and trying to understand the condition and then navigate through the world and sometimes we don't have the capacity to understand a well meaning post, or comment c because we're dealing with a condition that no one can help us with..... And actually with all the budget cuts the little bit we had, has gone.

Thank you, Frizzcat. You get it! I appreciate your kindness and thoughtfulness.

Better than sharing the other stuff like ADHD doesn't exist and in my day kids just needed a good smack.