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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I want my wedding photos and I don't care about the photographers life circumstances!

24 replies

weddingmalarkyy · 17/04/2015 20:52

So I feel I may be being unreasonable. But I am getting seriously annoyed now with my wedding photographer.

To give a bit of backstory, the photographer is a friend of my brothers. He is not typically a wedding photographer, he has done a couple, but he mostly does headshots, speciality events etc. I wouldn't have chosen him had he not been a close friend of my brothers, he gave us a discount for being 'friends and family' however, I feel with the discount it was on par with other wedding photographers in my area who we could have booked. So we booked up. We got married, I had an awful day- not related specifically to the photographer although I wasn't pleased that he didn't seem to be taking many photos. So I wanted to forget about my wedding, I love my hubby and I am just trying to leave our 'special' day deep at the back of my mind.

In our contract, we are meant to have the photos sent to us for proof in one week, and our album, prints ect in 8 weeks after the wedding. The proofs came in 3 weeks, with large watermarks all over the middle of them to prevent us getting these printed out ourselves. I emailed back with some touchups I wanted done- the pictures were quite frankly, crap. There were lovely ones of myself and DH at the aisle where we said our vows in posed pictures and the rug at the bottom of the picture is all folded up at a corner, as though someone tripped on it. It spoils the image. There are lovely ones of myself and my dad with ugly boxes in the background. Other posed pictures have hotel staff in the background, one you can actually see right into their staff room due to the angle the picture was taken in.

He emailed back, 8 weeks later, with the album mock up- the editting I requested (mainly about cropping out the other people and blemishes) has been ignored. But I was getting impatient waiting as he was already over the time he had said it would take in the contract. I told him to go ahead and just get it printed for us.

Fast forward 3 months. I am still waiting. I emailed him 3 weeks ago chasing it up and he said he was waiting on the album being delivered 'any day now'. I've heard nothing since. My brother has also attempted to chase it up, but has not heard anything. I am a friend of his on both his photography fb page and his personal page. It looks as though there has been many different things going on with him- he moved country, he had nowhere to live, he seems to be battling depression. I am sympathetic to his circumstances, but I feel so messed around!

I have already paid £800 for wedding pictures I'm not happy with, and I have been waiting so long. Family members have kept asking about them as they had been so excited to see them, but I feel so ashamed that I have been let down that when they actually do arrive I will have no enjoyment to share.

I'm at a loss what to do from here. My communication with the photographer is completely down to him as my emails remain unanswered, FB messages are unread and he does not return phone calls or texts. I think he will eventually get back in contact in his own time and I am confident that I will get my pictures eventually, but I am so pissed off!!

OP posts:
londonrach · 17/04/2015 20:56

Yanbu. Not sure what you can do. We paid £200 for 2 dvds full of photos. (We could print as we needed) We popped to boots to get photos printed off and made own album but was shocked at cost of other photographers and they wanted to charge per picture and use the photod as they wanted. Krrp trying and congratulations op x

weddingmalarkyy · 17/04/2015 21:02

Thank you for replying. I never thought it would have turned into such a huge rant!
If I could turn back time, my wedding would be totally different to how it turned out. I'm so ready to just have my photos so I don't need to think about it again.

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Only1scoop · 17/04/2015 21:07

Yanbu

Can you possibly ask your brother to contact him?

I'd at this point be thinking something was off about the whole thing.

RB68 · 17/04/2015 21:08

You know what - treat you and hubby to a photo day together, no bad memories - photos you like etc. Many people do not like their wedding photos and they will be tarred with the whole event and afterwards - even if you only get one or two of the new ones you will love them and you can use someone reputable and local to you.

Sorry you are having problems. You are not being unreasonable.

weddingmalarkyy · 17/04/2015 21:12

My brother has already contacted him, but heard nothing from him either.
For a time, I believe he was computer-less due to pretty much being homeless. There's since been a very lengthy rant on his own personal fb page about his photography business and about being 'ripped off' and 'hitting the bottle'. He's clearly going through his own issues, and I assume that completing this job is going to be lower on his list of priorities.

I've sent him another politely worded email, as I don't want to get angry and for him to potentially withhold my pictures for that. But I fully intend to have strong words when I have all the items I've rightly paid for in my hands.

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Cantbelievethisishappening · 17/04/2015 21:15

Oh that is sad OP.... why was your wedding so bad? Flowers

weddingmalarkyy · 17/04/2015 21:15

DH and I are due to be going on our delayed honeymoon in a couple weeks. I had contacted a few photographers in our honeymoon destination to look at doing some 'honeymoon' photoshoots there, but I was blown away by the price. I can't spend even more of our money on photos. We're not the type of people who will have them on display, and I couldn't spend another £300 or so just to have photos of the two of us sitting away in a box somewhere. If we know for sure that our wedding photos are never coming, then it's something I would consider, but I would never need two lots of pictures. We intent to get some nice photos of us on honeymoon just on our camera, asking someone nearby to take some pics on the beach ect, but nothing pricey or formal.

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landrover · 17/04/2015 21:15

He is clearly having problems. Maybe ask your brother to pop in and just say you want a disc of pics (rather than nothing if he bails!). You can then photoshop etc and sort it yourself? (I realise thats not what you've paid for though, sorry)

Cantbelievethisishappening · 17/04/2015 21:16

oh.... and YANBU at all

Hulababy · 17/04/2015 21:17

Can you just contact him and ask him to forget about all the books/prints etc and have him sent you a DVD with the images, without watermarks

You have presumably paid him a lot of money and not had anything in return.

weddingmalarkyy · 17/04/2015 21:18

I'm being unfair when I say it was a bad wedding, but it wasn't the day I had imagined. We had a lot of people let us down and it caused me to reconsider a lot of my friendships and family relationships. But I am seeing the negatives there, on the flip side I was so grateful to the people who did make it so special and amazing. I am working hard to see things as glass half full as opposed to glass half empty.

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HeyDuggee · 17/04/2015 21:18

he is not treating you like his friend's sister, so I would stop treating him like your brother's friend.

Deliverables due on xyz dates per contract - not fullfilled

Client communication on specifics for customised deliverables - ignored and not followed.

Get deliverables (be specific) by x date. Otherwise, he's broken the contract and you want a refund. Small claims court next.

landrover · 17/04/2015 21:21

Thats a shame Wedding, maybe one day you will look back at it and see the funny side (realise I have no idea what happened, sorry). Any thoughts of asking guests to send you their pics (just in case?)

thatstoast · 17/04/2015 21:22

I was going to recommend small claims, it's quite easy. That said, if he's left the country and is practically homeless then there's probably not much a judge can do. If you threaten with small claims it might scare him enough to get his act together and give you the photos?

weddingmalarkyy · 17/04/2015 21:22

The wedding photo package we have is including a disk of all images- which I have insisted are WITHOUT watermark as I don't want any reminder of his poor photography brand and business ethic on our forever pictures. As he had been homeless and moving about, my brother does not know his address- although it is in a city a 2 hour drive away from us. If he doesn't respond to our queries, then I doubt we will get his address off him.

I doubt he has been lying when he said the album was due to be delivered as I had seen all the work he had done with the layout of it. I can't be certain of the reasons we haven't got our photos yet, but I feel its down to him maybe not making it a priority to get it to us- but I do trust that it is ready to go.

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MustBeLoopy390 · 17/04/2015 21:23

Yanbu and take no crap! We've only just got ours back from our August last year wedding and have found out that despite her asking us to have no one else taking photos on phones etc during ceremony as she would get the pics we wanted she hasn't got one of dd giving me away and saying her bits! Bloody fuming that we paid £525 for essentially 50 pictures on a usb stick. Admittedly there are a further 19 pics, three badly cropped ones of the venue, and SIXTEEN of random shite like my dress on a hanger, my shoes, dd's dress etc which we asked her NOT to bother taking. Imo we should have gone with someone else, and should have pressed harder after finding out that couples who were married after us had all their pics etc within two months.

Only1scoop · 17/04/2015 21:23

So other than his services for the day....what do you actually have in your hands in way of photos now?

What are you meant to be having....Is it a bound album with prints mounted or a photo book?

Hippychick73 · 17/04/2015 21:24

Where are you going on holiday OP
Often hotel have in house photographers that will do a free photos shoot with you only buying the pictures you want

Email the hotel and ask them if they have a in house photographer or can recommend one maybe in a sister hotel or something.
Never know if you tell them what happened they might throw something in free especially as your honeymooners

pinkr · 17/04/2015 21:27

You're not in Scotland are you op?sounds very very familiar. Our photographer was a friend of a friend who promised all sorts but it didn't materialise. I got the photos he eventually gave us to someone else to edit.

honeysucklejasmine · 17/04/2015 21:28

At least you have a contract, you have proof of what is owed. Our local BBC radio station has a consumer rights programme who deal with this sort of thing. Have you anything like that?

weddingmalarkyy · 17/04/2015 21:30

We had amazing photos from the guests, which I am so thankful for! But it's not the formal family ones that our photographer actually got right. It's those ones that the family are keen to have and I feel so stuck in the middle as I can't chase it up anymore than what I have. I'm planning to make a scrapbook of the wedding when we get our formal pictures to help me get over the disappointments in the day and remember all the good things.
It is a leather bound photobook that we are getting, but it will now feature a great deal of pictures of family members we are now NC with due to them being selfish, inconsiderate twats.

That might be a good idea to look at in house photographers and I will do that! It won't be the same, but a few nice 'coupley' pictures will be really good to have.

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weddingmalarkyy · 17/04/2015 21:31

pinkr I shall pm you.

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weddingmalarkyy · 17/04/2015 21:37

If I were to go through small claims, what would the chances be of getting my photos that way? I would think that the photographer would react badly and not give me the images in the end.

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weddingmalarkyy · 17/04/2015 21:48

Similar to the point of the small claims court, I don't want to take things to the next step until I am certain I am getting nowhere as I don't want to ruin my chances of getting anything from him.

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