AIBU to want the goverment to introduce lunch box standards to stop the food police.

[porkchop9]

First post on mumsnet after reading posts here for a long time. I'm a mum of 3 dc, dd8 ds5 dd3 and live in the Surrey.

Dd aged 3 does 2 full days at preschool, you pay £4.50 for the lunch hour club and provide your own lunch. Monday first day back after Easter Holiday and were presented with new lunch box rules/guidelines, there are some strict rules already in place but these new rules are beyond ridiculous. My opinion in general is they're your children and you should have the right to feed them as you want.

We do not allow sweets, fruit winders/fruit school bars/dried fruit (sugar content is high), nuts, chocolate, crisps, biscuits,cakes (homemade or otherwise), no chocolate mousse/yogurts or pudding, no processed food (including such items as ham, cheese slices, cream cheese, corned beef, chicken roll, sandwich meats with added water), no fruit yogurts that have been previously frozen, NO FOOD item thats been previously frozen, no tinned or frozen fruit, no chocolate spread or peanut butter.

There are plenty more items listed infact this update takes up 4 A4 pages. One other section states Food is checked for dates, whether it is edible and follows our lunch box standards. Food that is not suitable will be returned to parent in a clear bag with an explanation of why, if repeatedly provide incorrect items they will be charged £2 per item and your child will be excluded from the setting until charges have been paid

Today there was a parents meeting with the bussiness manager who wrote this update. She was absolutley vile to one parent in particular who ended up really embarrassed and near tears and yes I and several other parents did stand up her her. The business mangers issuse was the lady shopped monthly bulk buyed and frooze items such as yogurt, cheese and ham, her dc only had fresh fruit the first week of the month then tinned/dried after that etc, she accused the mum of damaging her dc health. The lady did explain they were on a tight budget and freezing things was the only way she could feed her dc a balanced diet as weekly shopping was out of the question for her family. The last time I looked and this was some time ago tinned/frozen fruit & veg was still 1 of your 5 a day. So aibu to think that a basic set of national guidelines would stop the pack lunch police.

Those lunch box rules are ridiculous. You DH has done the right thing to withdraw your DH. I think all parents should email the business manager and also contact Ofsted. As others have said I don't think you can be fined for sending a wrong food item in.

Sorry for double post. I thought the first one hadn't gone as had an internet glitch.

Not in Surrey, but in our county if you pulled out now they wouldn't get any of the funded hours- due to headcount being beginning of May. I know you're not bothered about the money- but why should they have it!

I love that a business manager thinks she can tell a doctor about nutrition! How completely batshit crazy! You and DH are doing the right thing by moving your child. Clearly this person is on a power trip and in my experience, people like that can't admit they have been wrong, even in the face of overwhelming evidence.

I hope lots of other parents withdraw their children too. It sounds to me as if the bm was actually just targeting a single family she has an irrational problem with, and the rest of you are collateral damage.

Good for your DH!

Good on your dh, more parents should follow his lead, I bet they will backtrack quite quickly. Nice little money spinner for them £4.50 for lunch club . And fined £2 for each illegal item . I woukd report them to ofstead, what they are doing is wrong. They have imposed this without consulting any medical professional, they are fining parents.

I haven't read all the other post but my opinion of this business manager is that they have no knowledge or understanding of food. I'm a qualified food technologist and work in the food manufacturing industry. I have my greatest aversion to the freezing.......freezing will only impact the quality of food not the safety and in some cases vitamin content is greater in frozen over fresh vegetables. I could go on with a more detailed report and hints on a balanced diet for this setting but my opinion if they are being so prescriptive they supply the food simples!

I think It'd have been easier to email a small list of acceptable food.

You and your DH have done the right thing OP.

Just one thing- I wouldn't adhere to the 4 week notice that the BM is insisting on. I would say that the nursery has changed its terms and conditions without 4 weeks notice. Had the food list been in place prior to you placing your child there, you would have gone elsewhere. Refuse to take part in the 4 weeks notice.

Also point out that the BM's unhealthy and paranoid attitude towards food is harmful to your child and you are removing her for health and safety reasons. Keeping her there for the four required weeks would be putting her at risk and you will therefore be taking her with immediate effect.

(BM-Bumfaced Madam or Business Manager)

How ridiculous. Where did she get her degree in nutrition?

As a teacher, I have always flat out refused any attempts by admin to make me the food police. Nowhere, in any of my degrees did it say I was required to check lunch boxes. It's not part of my job description.

in his opinion as a medical professional she was talking a load of rubbish

Ha! And I would also run MissBattleaxe's line. Even if you can afford to wear the cost, why should the preschool profit from a money spinning little policy like this?

Wtf? How anyone can write that list and then defend it is beyond me!
I think withdrawing DD is the right thing to do!
DS1 is in reception and has free school meals (which at his school are very good quality) but the rules for packed lunches are just no nuts as their are children in school with nut allergies and a request not to put sweets or fizzy drinks in which I think is reasonable and sensible.
Your DH has done the right thing.

Sorry for the typos! I'm half asleep (got woken up by my three yr old)

Good for you OP - but I'm sad to think that the people who are least well off will be both least able to comply with these rules, and presumably have least choice in terms of DC childcare.

I'd be sending this to the Guardian, not the Daily Mail.

"Fine money" my arse.
It's probably going towards her goodies on her next food shop.

Have heard it all now, that is completely out of order.

Some dc for several reasons don't get enough to eat as it is, by restricting pretty much everything the average pre-schooler eats ( mine included ) then it's going to create more harm than good.

I would be asking her two questions.
1-has she taken this advice from a qualified dietician/nutritionist?
2-was there previously a food/healthy eating policy? If so, will it be updated to include this?

My dd would starve if I sent her there, is there a separate list of acceptable foods?

MissBattleaxe is 100% correct - do this:

I would say that the nursery has changed its terms and conditions without 4 weeks notice. Had the food list been in place prior to you placing your child there, you would have gone elsewhere. Refuse to take part in the 4 weeks notice.

Also point out that the BM's unhealthy and paranoid attitude towards food is harmful to your child and you are removing her for health and safety reasons. Keeping her there for the four required weeks would be putting her at risk and you will therefore be taking her with immediate effect.

Even if you could afford to pay 4weeks of fees for a place you aren't using, there's a moral imperative to ensure the bm suffers the full consequences of her idiocy.

The title business manager says it all really, profit, money making, don't care less about the children, rather like a lot of care homes.

That lunch system with the fines is a lovely little money making venture for her. I hope that it backfires for her in spectacular fashion. YYYY to Missbattleaxe cite that to the BM, and reporting this to OFSTEAD.

Dh took letter in person this morning withdrawing dd formal, bm seemed to have had a slight attitude adjustment towards Dh, Dh was having.none of it. I am going to mention the 15 hours to my local aauthority but don't know if it will do much good, the pre school dh has made arrangements at doesn't accept the funding it's a private school. Dh did ask bm about the £117 dw paid you on Monday for dd lunch club until end of July, bm said it's not refundable. (that is in terms and conditions) Dh said that was fine and suggested bm used the money towards a course on nurturtion at the local adult learning centre, think Dh come back is priceless wish I had filmed it!

Wow way to go Porkchop9 dh, by the way, your thread was doing the rounds on Facebook, it might have come up on BM newsfeed

She's completely bonkers, has an unhealthy attitude to food, a huge chip on her shoulder, no empathy and shouldn't be working with children! Please, please OP, take MissBattleaxe's advice and insist on a refund of the prepaid lunch money as well as refusing to accept the 4 weeks' notice. Put it in writing and copy whomever is in charge of the preschool and the school, as well as Ofsted, and yes do send it to the Guardian as well! This madness has to stop, for the sake of all the children still there and their families.

And I'm surprised the private school doesn't accept the funding! Our DS are at a private primary school (and nursery before that) and they accepted the funding until the term after DC turned 5, so part of the fees in Reception were also covered.