AIBU to trust my intuition sometimes, and is there a logical explanation for what happened this morning?

[MidnightSun77]

(N/C for this as I'm a MN regular).

We live in a first floor flat in a small gated complex.

This morning, about 10mins after DH left for work, someone buzzed our intercom. For no apparent reason I felt a sudden surge of fear. I asked who it was over intercom, couldn't hear anything but this often happens as there's a fault with it. Usually I buzz people in anyway even if I'm alone (I know I probably shouldn't but it usually turns out to be a delivery or my neighbour forgetting his key-fob).
However, this morning I felt strongly that I should NOT buzz them in or even go downstairs to check who it was. They buzzed again, I answered but couldn't hear much, faintly heard a man's voice but couldn't make out any words. I still had a very strong sense I shouldn't buzz him in so I ignored it. Why would I suddenly feel like this? Do you think there's any truth in 'intuition' or sensing danger or is it something else? Would you have listened to this feeling, or let him in as usual? I could have gone down to communal front door and looked through glass, but even that felt like really bad idea.

Im not usually superstitious or nervous. The only time something similar happened was years ago. I was in uni halls and used to take my laundry to campus laundrette at 2am as this was only time it was quiet. I'd done this regularly for 6months. One night I got my laundry ready as usual but felt jumpy and kept delaying. Eventually I carried it down the 4 flights of stairs to the side-door (laundrette was a 5-min walk away to a different part of campus, isolated from main buildings). It was a warm moonlit night. When I opened the door I noticed a dead glassy-eyed rabbit on the path, which made me jump. Suddenly the nerves turned into full-blown fear. I shut door and hurried back to my room. I felt really silly about this and almost made myself go out anyway as had no clean clothes left! Then next day we had visit from police... a girl had been sexually assaulted on campus by an unknown attacker (who wasn't caught) at 3am close to the laundrette I'd been about to go to. I was really shaken up.
Do you think this was a 'sixth sense' warning me against going out that night, or a complete coincidence? I was already uneasy before I saw the dead rabbit but would probably have gone to laundrette anyway had the rabbit not been there. On a different night I might have not been fazed by dead rabbit at all.

Anyone else had any experiences like this? Do you listen to your intuition or dismiss it?

I used to walk home alone from the bus stop after a night out all the time. It was a short walk, 5 mins max. It was a busy area but the side roads towards my flat were sometimes quiet however I always felt safe. I must have done this hundreds of times over 9 years at all times 2/3/4am. Only on 2 occasions did my instinct tell me to not walk home and get a cab from the bus stop. It was such a strong almost overwhelming feeling I will never forget it. Plus I was always on a tight budget so cabs were a very rare luxury.

Both times in the very short cab journey to my front door I saw a man walking alone and no other person. This in itself was not that unusual but it did make me feel very uncomfortable.

OP, like you I will never know if my instincts were right but it's always worth listening to them, it's such a strong feeling when it does happen. You did the right thing by not opening the door.

It's all here for a reason. We are all still animals and should listen to our intuition more, the modern world has lessened them but at our core we still have it

I worked with an American guy who fought in Vietnam who always said "if you feel your heckles go, listen". Always have and always will!

Read the book called 'The Gift of Fear'. 'Feelings' or 'instincts' are perfectly rational and not at all 'woo' after reading it.

You just pick up on certain patterns or situations that are not normal and clock them.

I never answer the buzzer unless I'm specifically expecting someone.

My mother may have saved our lives in 1972 when her instinct told her to drive by the house of a friend who was expecting us for lunch. She still doesn't know why exactly what made her turn round and go home. She rang her friend to say we would not be coming after all. She tried to reach all through the day. My mum's friend had been raped and murdered in the early morning hours. Her killer was never found.

I think our brains process lots of information and sometimes can't give us a 'thought' but a feeling.

I don't think they are always unconscious thoughts, there are thousands of physical things we experience but don't notice everyday.

Our brains can then put memories in and give an even stronger feeling.

Examples of things our brains do. Touch your nose with your finger.

OK did you feel your nose with your finger and your finger with your nose at the same time? But the nerve signals from your finger took longer to reach your brain so your brain did something to make them feel like you did both at the same time.

Second one. Have you ever felt your seat belt vibrate tot he music in your car? I hadn't, until a deaf friend asked me about the music and I asked her how she knew. After she said the seat belt was vibrating I could feel it too.

My mother was evacuated with her four brothers and sisters and mother to a hotel in Norfolk during WW2. About 2am one night she and her siblings were woken by her mother who frantically made then get dressed and leave. My grandmother tried to get others to do the same but was ignored. Mum remembered the hour walk to the railway station vividly and the long wait for the first train. A German plane dropped it's unused bombs on the hotel that night and everyone left was killed. Mind you my grandma also had an extra finger on one hand and had other witch like characteristics!

Interesting thread- it's made me paranoid now though and I have to walk to work in a minute

The Gift of Fear is a great book, mainly about intuition about people, it's not at all "woo".

A lot of these experiences that don't involve people posters have met (where they picked up that things were "off") sound like anxiety (I have this). Getting off trains and things. Not a problem unless it happens a lot or interferes with life as mine has at times!

In terms of the OP's examples, attacks on campus are (sadly) not unheard of and it was very likely just coincidence that on this particular night you felt worried and changed plans. As for the buzzer, you don't know who was there. In both cases your intuition was probably telling you that you wanted to be more careful about security!

Reading this thread has also made me about violent attacks by men on women (and some men of course).

And cold callers.

I've had the intuition feeling twice, about a friend rather than me. Once it was about late-night driving - she had a job which involved driving at night in winter.

i'd always found her driving a bit reckless, and I had a very strong feeling she would have a crash, which she did, thankfully not a serious injury, but a lot of hassle and stress with all the insurance and very upsetting of course. I wished I'd warned her I was worried about her driving but it felt like such a patronising thing to do, I didn't even drive myself at the time.

The second time was about a friend's marriage. She had got her wedding ring stick on her finger so it wouldn't come off, and she said 'it's on for life' - and I suddenly thought, very strongly 'but you won't always be married to him'. Her 'D'H seemed like Mr Nice Guy, there was no reason to think they'd split up, but he cheated on her and left her less than a year later.

Yeah, I thought the Gift of Fear by Gavin Becker was very well worth reading too. Kind of gives a good explanation for trusting the intuition that a lot of the time we tell ourselves we're beign silly to listen to.

Had that feeling very rarely in my life, only a handful of times. I wish I'd listened to one of them as a life-changing opportunity went by.

A few years ago I posted here about a local man who I felt was very strange around children in general, and my dds in particular. I got heartily flamed by most and accused of being the sort of paranoid parent who sees a paedophile behind every tree. Actually both DH and I are the friendly outgoing sort, and we have had plenty of strangers fuss over our dds and not ever felt (as a pp put it) our "hackles rise". DH completely loathed this man,(very unusual for him) and there was an incident where he happened to be inside my house, largely because I was too polite to refuse his help, when I felt real prickles of fear. He has a disability and I knew I was faster than him, but the fact that I was even thinking along those lines was very telling. I read "the gift of fear" and it really helped me to have the confidence to trust my judgement and keep my dds away from this man. I also told my dds that I didn't trust him, even though they were really very tiny. A handful of posters, mainly who had suffered abuse in their own childhoods or come across it within their social group, said "trust yourself". I had been so worried about the man'd feelings, "what if I am wrong" etc, that I had lost sight of what messages he was clearly giving me- That his behaviour around little children was at best completely inappropriate and at worst, grooming.
On a similar note, years before I became a mother, I did some work in a well known large zoo. There was a visitor to the children's section who came every few months, always alone, and the full time staff all found him very sinister and would literally not let him out of their sight. Wherever he went there would be a keeper somewhere close, sweeping up, or feeding, but actually watching him.

I might not go out really late when it's dark (although I probably would) but I would buzz someone in.

Intuition about something you've actually seen - yes. Random bad feeling about nothing? No. I ignore it. Coincidentally, also never been wrong.

(Also agree with PP who mentioned the man on the mountain thread. Why do people rubbish her intuition which was actually based on seeing a person but this OP is getting a pat on the back?!)

I believe in a kind of 6th sense. If I have a bad feeling about something I always listen to it. I have ignored it in the past and very, very much regretted it. Examples I have are:

. One night went to bed as normal and my then 8 month old had her own room. Ide checked on her as I normally do and went to sleep. I woke up in the early hours and had a urge to go check her - found her covered in sick and choking on sick but making no noise. If I hadn't of checked her I honestly believe she would of choked to death she was blue in the face.

. Another time I told my husband to go the long way home to London, he was pissed off and it added another hour to our journey - but I just knew I didn't want to go the direct route. The next day we saw that a massive car crash had happened and people had died on the road we would of normally taken.

. I phoned my friend in a panick after having a horrible dream about her horse one night, in the dream he had been cut to pieces and was bleeding, she went down the next day and found her horse tangled up in the barb wire fence, he needed the vet and hundreds of stitches. She still to this day can't believe it and wished shed go down when Ide rang her but as any normal person would think, it was just a friend whod had a weird dream!

I can't explain any of the above - all I know is if I have a bad feeling about something I always listen to that 'gut feeling' x

I've just remembered another incident from years ago, when I lived in town. It was a 20-min walk from town centre to home, and I often used to do it alone after dark, sometimes after midnight if I'd been out with friends. It was mainly through busy area, lots of students around, but the last bit was along a quiet road, up a hill with hardly any houses, just schools and a deserted stretch of pavement that went over a railway bridge. One night, around 11pm, I walked home as usual but felt very very nervous when I reached the quiet stretch. For first time ever I decided to walk in road instead of on pavement. I walked up middle of road (no cars at this time) and as I came over the hill I noticed 2 men in hoodies standing on pavement next to some steps (steps led down to railway). One of them called out to me and I ran the last bit, didn't stop until I was indoors.
To this day I don't know if they would have hurt me, but it's odd I chose to walk up middle of road not pavement that night. The pavement had no street lamps on that part and lots of trees but I'd never walked in road before.

I've also remembered an occasion when my intuition (or instinct) was plain wrong about someone. I interviewed a girl for a graduate job at my old company who was a bit posh and I dismissed as a 'Chelsea girl' type, thinking 'I'd never hire someone like THAT'. Her CV was passed on to a colleague, he hired her for his team instead, and she became a firm friend. To think I'd nearly missed out on a close friendship because I thought someone was 'a bit posh'!

Mind you, I also got it wrong on another occasion, I interviewed someone I had serious doubts about, but I thought 'someone should give this guy a break and hire him'. Turned out to be a disastrous decision, he was useless.