To take my DS out for the day whilst DH away?

[phoenixrose314]

Going to keep this short.

DH is away with DSS and his football team in a foreign country. They do this for a few days every year, they always have a great time.

Our DS is 2 and I have been talking to DH about taking him to a particular wildlife park for over a year now. If we include before he was born and I wanted to take the DSChildren, I've been harping on about it for nigh on four years now. He always grumps about how much money we spend on ANY day out, and always found a reason why we couldn't go (some which were valid, others were quite ropey).

So today I took DS along with my mum and we had a lovely day. It was glorious sunshine and my DS had up close encounters with so many animals, he didn't stop smiling all day and not a tantrum in sight! (For a two year old that's amazing).

So I posted the pics on Facebook, and my DH posts saying 'Feel like crying. Gutted I missed out.'

And now I'm torn between feeling really guilty for making him feel bad when he's so far away, and feeling annoyed that all the times I've asked him to go, he said no!

AIBU for taking my DS?

Why do you even put up with this crap

you could have nice, unspoiled with your dc all the time while he lives the single life

imagine....

unspoiled *times

I could get 'looks fab, would have loved to have been able to join you'

Gutted I missed out is a bit much. 'Feel like crying' from a grown up is on another scale of 'too much'.

IMO disrespectful of him to post that on FB.

He has other responsibilities and like anyone who does (other kids, work travel, whatever) he needs to recognise that life doesn't stop when he's not there. I'm sure if he'd said 'that's a fab idea, lets go next time we all have a long weekend' or whatever, you would have tried to arrange something to fit him in.

What Gatorade said!
He's an idiot.

YANBU. I wouldn't take my DS to the zoo without DH because we both can't wait to show him an elephant for the first time (DS is obsessed) but if your DH has been avoiding it and is away with his other DS abroad watching football. No way can he complain.

I'd reply saying don't worry we'll go again when you get back. Offer to book tickets there and then.

Did anyone comment on his comment?

You could say;

Don't worry, I spent £100 on a family ticket for the year so we can go anytime

I'd reply ' I'm so pleased you want to go. DS had such a fab time, let's all go together next weekend. I'll tell DS Daddy can't wait to take him ??'

YANBU of course you should take your toddler out for them day without worrying about your oh.
He is away with dss and you are out with ds, sounds fair.

I always take the kids somewhere nice if my DH if away doing something nice, it's just being equal not rubbing anyone's nose in anything.

no guilt required on your part.

I echo what others have said.

Thanks SO much!

Am over it already. He is a bit of a drama queen from time to time, he's been driving me mad lately so frankly was quite relieved knowing he'd be out of the country with DSS for a few days!

Quite like stubbornstains and *OrlandoWoolf@'s suggestions... putting them away for our next conversation. Now considering taking DS abroad just the two of us next Easter when they're away again...

Hang on, hang on!

Maybe the DH's comment means "Oh wow if I had known how much DS would enjoy it I'd have agreed to go. Gutted I didn't and you had to go on your own because I wouldn't come, and I've missed out on seeing his delight through my own stupid fault and now I want to cry."

It might not be selfish or disingenuous at all. It might be genuine sincere regret for constantly blocking something that DS enjoyed so much.

agree with other posters: he sounds like a right drama queen and a bit of a knickers too.

Holy God! If my husband had posted such shit on FB I'd be so ashamed What an eejit.

Why don't men have any balls these days? What a wimp.

Nice bit of dreary sexism there, alrayyan

dreary....I haven't heard that for years. great word.

Not sure I even get this. What's the problem again? Everyone had a nice time.

Disneyland next Easter

YANBU, life doesn't stop when he's not around and he's being a big baby if he complains. Dh works some weekends and I take mine out on our own or with my parents. I even spend some time out with dh's parents. The only two comments dh ever makes are "hope you had a great time" or "oo good, we'll have to go back when I'm off"