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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

'God made us' -AIBU?

68 replies

KindergartenKop · 10/04/2015 18:29

Ds1: 'God made us'
Me: 'Who told you that?'
Ds1: 'Grandma'

Grandma is quite religious, dh and I strongly believe children can make up their own minds when they are old enough. Aibu to be a bit annoyed? Do you reckon it's worth having a word?

OP posts:
wigglesrock · 10/04/2015 20:01

Like others have said, can you not just use it as a starting point to talk about how people believe different things. My kids know their Dad doesn't think there's a God, I'd like to think there is one, the 9 year old is going through a pious stage, the 7 year old isn't interested in God unless there's a Minecraft slant and the 4 year old doesn't believe in God because she "can't see it".

monkeysox · 10/04/2015 20:03

Do your dc get confused as if they attend state school most schools celebrate Xmas and tell the story etc?

DisappointedOne · 10/04/2015 20:05

Birthdays - absolutely.

Xmas - barely.

OrlandoWoolf · 10/04/2015 20:06

Those who are in the UK and atheist: do you celebrate birthdays and Christmas and just ignore the religious side

FFS - how many times do people say this?

News to you - the standard response is that Christmas is cultural to many people. They don't celebrate the birth of Christ but enjoy getting together with family and sharing presents. It's one of the few times this culture can do that as a whole community.

And birthdays. WTF has that to do with Christmas?

I am sure most Christians understand that. But you always get the same fucking comments whenever someone dares to say that are an atheist.

DisappointedOne · 10/04/2015 20:07

Waiting for DD's school to present the xmas story as fact, and then I'll be squashing that.

mrsmalcolmreynolds · 10/04/2015 20:08

monkey no my DD is not confused at all. We talk about the story of Christmas as told in the bible as just that - a story based in part on historical fact. We also talk about the messages and values associated with Christmas. It's entirely possible (easy really) to do all this without subscribing to Christianity itself or any other religion.

mrsmalcolmreynolds · 10/04/2015 20:09

monkey no my DD is not confused at all. We talk about the story of Christmas as told in the bible as just that - a story based in part on historical fact. We also talk about the messages and values associated with Christmas. It's entirely possible (easy really) to do all this without subscribing to Christianity itself or any other religion.

mrsmalcolmreynolds · 10/04/2015 20:09

monkey no my DD is not confused at all. We talk about the story of Christmas as told in the bible as just that - a story based in part on historical fact. We also talk about the messages and values associated with Christmas. It's entirely possible (easy really) to do all this without subscribing to Christianity itself or any other religion.

mrsmalcolmreynolds · 10/04/2015 20:10

Wretched phone - sorry for triple post.

QueenInTheNorth · 10/04/2015 20:12

Genuine question - What do birthday's have to do with religion? can someone enlighten me.

OrlandoWoolf · 10/04/2015 20:12

DS knows about the Easter story and Christmas. He does not believe in God. It could be a coincedence that I am the same - but I have made sure he is aware that some people are religious and that's their view.

He might change his views later on - but at the age of 9, I don't think he should be forced to believe in a God - or be expected to worship a God at school. But that's a whole new (and regular thread)

At the same time, he should not be told by school that God does not exist. God should be left out of school. If mentioned, it should be that some people are religious, other people aren't. It's not our job to tell you what to believe.

Original poster
KindergartenKop · 10/04/2015 20:49

My ds isn't yet 3. The problem is that he's in the whywhywhy stage.

OP posts:
monkeysox · 10/04/2015 20:55

Queen. Three wise men took gifts to jesus when born, first birthday presents.

I only asked as my kids did the nativity story at Xmas in school and wondered how you dealt with it.

AlwaysDancing1234 · 10/04/2015 21:01

I've had the "some people believe..." discussion with DS many many times. I say something along the lines of: "yes people from all different religions believe in different Gods, I don't believe in any particular God myself because science had taught us about evolution which is another theory about humans came to live on Earth"

AlwaysDancing1234 · 10/04/2015 21:02

Sorry just seen your DS is quite young so maybe just keep the explanation to a brief " different people believe different things about God"

Nandocushion · 10/04/2015 21:06

When 7yo wants to ask something about god, I always make him clarify which god he means, and list off all the ones I can remember. He usually settles on Zeus.

OrlandoWoolf · 10/04/2015 21:12

monkeysox

First birthday presents? How do you know that?

I have never heard that idea.

Did it go like this?

SolidGoldBrass · 10/04/2015 21:33

Luckily we live in a nicely multicultural area so DS has always been aware that different people believe different things. (His school has taken the kids to a mosque, a church, a synagogue, a Hindu temple... I am sort of hoping they will squeeze in a visit to a stone circle at one of the solstices). DS is also aware that it's a load of old cock but that it's important to some people and he mustn't be rude about what other people believe in until he's old enough to construct a decent argument and also to know when it is and isn't a good time to disagree with people.

AlwaysDancing1234 · 10/04/2015 21:37

Also DS age 7 has said he doesn't believe in God but will celebrate any religious/cultural festival going including Christmas, Eid, Hanukkah, Diwai, Chinese New Year as he loves good food and a party!

monkeysox · 10/04/2015 21:48

Well no one "knows " for sure do they.

Allergictoironing · 10/04/2015 21:48

Midwinter, Yule, Christmas, Winter Solstice - all celebrated at or about the same date.

As far as can be worked out by biblical scholars, the birth of Jesus was sometime during the northern hemisphere spring and not mid winter; it's mainly celebrated when it is because that's when almost all other religions have a festival.

catkind · 10/04/2015 22:05

Ha ha, never heard anyone claim all birthdays as a Christian celebration before. So what about anniversaries, do you own those too? After all, a birthday is just the anniversary of a birth.

My son's school generally present religion as "Christians believe ...", "Jews believe...", "Muslims believe ..." which is fine by me. Learning about religion = good. Presenting religious beliefs as true facts = bad. (Unless you're actually a religious school, and that's a different discussion.)

The nativity play was presented in exactly the same way as the play about a snowman they did the next year. A story. No assertions made about whether it was true or not. Fine with that.

I do hope those Christians that think atheists shouldn't celebrate "Christmas" haven't themselves recently celebrated "Easter". That would be most hypocritical.

ragged · 11/04/2015 09:01

Jehovah Witnesses (who call themselves Christians) enthusiastically celebrate anniversaries but not birthdays (bad biblical precedent) or Christmas (because of the date misplacement).

At least atheists aren't pretending to follow any divine irrefutable rules in our decisions.

OrlandoWoolf · 11/04/2015 09:47

I presume there was some kind of dating system a long time ago. People knew how old they were.

I'm sure someone must have thought, I think I'm 18, let's have a party.

SanityClause · 11/04/2015 09:53

Where are birthday celebrations mentioned in the bible? I had a very religious upbringing - bible study every day, as well as church, Sunday school, youth group, choir, etc - and have never heard of that.