About Noise in the Garden?

[LucilleLeSueur]

Warning: long and probably petty.

Background info: we rent. My husband and I are both professionals, with two small children.
We moved into our current rental two years ago (when I was pregnant with DC2). On our first day DD1 (then 3) and DH were playing in the garden when our next door neighbours shouted over the fence for them to "shut up". Apparently they didn't move to this estate to hear noisy children (suburban estate in prime residential area close to local schools etc in large university town, wtf?!)

Fwiw we are quite strict and definitely keep an ear out for excessive noise/ anything annoying or repetitive. It was absolutely normal child in garden noise at 3pm on a sunny Sunday.

Since then we've kept our distance but DD1 did tell me that the woman has asked her to be quiet over the fence once when she was playing outside with her friend. Again normal children's voices, no excessive shouting or shrieking.

Today DD1 had her friend over, so i took them and DD2 into the garden. Bit of bouncing on the trampoline, a picnic on a blanket, some "camping" in a play tent.
Neighbours were INDOORS but with windows open - loudly sighing to each other, crashing their door shut, and blaring his crappy dadrock music.

They are probably mid-50s, early 60s. He's got a mechanical hobby and is out a lot on our shared driveway tinkering with the various bits and pieces.

We have never had a party here, or a barbecue, we don't go out late at night, children are not allowed in the garden early at weekends, we always mow the lawn mid-afternoon to avoid disturbing anyone.

Our neighbours on the other side (the attached part of our semi) have never heard us making noise. We're clean, tidy, and good tenants.

Am I missing something? Are we really doing something wrong by being in the garden, or are they just being arseholes precious?

Previous tenants were single professionals. We previously lived on the top floor of flats and again had a brilliant relationship with all our neighbours and no complaints of noise. It's our first garden and it's been spoiled a bit by them. Hashtag: sadface.

I am very noise sensitive after run ins with bad neighbours in the past but children playing is part of the deal, especially in a suburban semi.

Yanbu, they sound like a pair of miseries.

They're just being precious.

For God's sake, let your children play and make noise, bollocks to the miseries next door.

I appreciate that loud, blaring Metallica could drive a neighbour mad but children playing ,bbq's and music (not too loud) are things you are able to do in your garden

Unanimous so far - yesssss!

Still we haven't deliberately not had bbqs etc. in order to keep in with them. It's more that we're hermit types who don't tend to do that stuff anyway ( though we are getting a BBQ this summer).

We're also originally not from the UK (though are near neighbours) so don't have lots of family about.

Have you committed the sin of being renters in what's supposed to be a naice owner occupied estate. My parents live in such a place and Dad is always on the look out for "inconsiderate" owners moving out and letting their properties to people who will lower the tone. (you don't get to choose your parents!) Anyway, just a thought because I know dad would see your noise differently to in new owners had moved in next door IYSWIM.

In any case they're being ridiculous and you should complain about the music

Yanbu, they sound dreadful and you seem to be very considerate! Ignore them and let your dc enjoy their garden

Oh and you're foreign too! .....except it's not funny.

Shrieking/screaming is annoying but normal playing and the noise that generates is totally fine. Your neighbours are being arseholes.

A lot of things about other people's children get on my nerves. Next door neighbour's children throwing stones at my cats caused me to shout at them to stop, and have words with the parents. Constant loud screaming / shrieking is borderline. Normal "playing out" sounds, at reasonable times of day, are just a part of life in the suburbs. If the neighbours don't like it, they should go and live in a lighthouse on a remote island somewhere.

You sound like incredibly considerate neighbours with well-behaved children. I'd love to live next door to you.

I can't stand people like this. I mean seriously, do they think kids shouldn't be allowed out to play in their own garden. Let them play and don't feel like you have to be constantly shushing them for fear of upsetting the neighbours. Don't let the miserable sods upset you.

Invite them round for a bbq, let them meet the DCs. (ply them with alcohol)

Everyone is a bit grrrr with 'strangers' invading their space (you don't like Dadrock music).

Life is sooo much less stressful if you are 'friends' with your neighbours despite having zero in common with them.

Let your kids be kids. You will never please these neighbours. They will find something to moan about. When they start paying your rent and bills they are entitled to a say in how you use your home, until then, let them get all passive aggressive with their music and ignore

Discounted interesting that you say that. We are from a country from which there is a small minority group that has a bad reputation. I wonder if they heard our accents and made a (wrong, as it happens) assumption?

Also this sounds silly but we have a very small and crappy car (ten years old and still going strong!). We never used it much as we lived in the city centre and always walked or biked. He's a bit of a petrol head I think and maybe they didn't like our pile o' crap little runabout cluttering up the neighbourhood?!

Think I'm getting paranoid
It's so flipping annoying though!

Ironically we are quite naice and middle class and have a house of our own elsewhere - we're renting because my husband's (naice middle class) job means we might have to move soon. also can't afford to buy here, damn pricey SE

Yanbu. Living in a street with gardens means hearing some noise from other gardens. They sound incredibly intolerant.

Nothing at all wrong with renting btw! Sorry if I sounded a bit flippant.

Norah I have had them around - we've had various interactions with them over the years. She's effusively nice in person (he's reticent but civil now) which is why I don't understand why they don't just talk to us if they have a problem?

The first day it happened, my husband asked them why they were shouting at him and they just ignored him and kept shouting. It's very weird - it's like when they can't see us over the fence they can say what they want, but in person they won't bring it up.

Garden trolls!

Your neighbours sounds like small minded twerps who need to get out more. Ignore them! And tell your kids to ignore them too. Or post some earplugs through their letterbox?

You passed my bitter old miser children's annoyance test when you said you stopped reppetative noises! And, am I the only one who sometimes earwigs on children playing?? The funny and imaginative things they say are so amusing.

Thanks guys. Feel a bit less ragey.

To be fair, there has been one or two occasions where she and her friend were shrieking but (as I would regardless of who our neighbours are) I went straight out and had a word. When it started again I brought them in. I really don't think we're inconsiderate in general.

Also there is sometimes that low whooshing sound of repetitive trampoline bouncing but she's never on it for more than ten minutes or so.

It's nothing compared to the few massive parties our others neighbours have had (which I wouldn't complain about as I know it's normal suburban living stuff!).

have

The only thing I'd possibly object to is the trampoline. I hate them but then my garden is tiny and so is everyone else's.

If you have a big garden, so what? I liked building camps in my parents' garden.

One of my neighbours yelled foul abuse at me one Sunday afternoon when I was watching something on BBC catch-up in my kitchen with the back door open while doing the washing up.

For a moment I thought it was too loud and possibly of offensive content, then I thought no, it wasn't, seeing as there were planes going overhead. Round here we have sirens screaming periodically and it's very common to have his dog barking because it wants to get in. And him shouting at it to shut the fuck up.

And it was Call The Midwife.

I stared at him and then turned it up. He is quite scary though.

He also leaned out of a window and screamed at some other neighbours who were having a giggly dinner party in their back garden.

It was just gone 11pm but it was a hot summer Saturday night and they were far less offensive than him.

If your neighbour tells your kids to be quiet again, tell them if they have a problem to speak to you not bully little kids, and that you are not going to ask them to be quiet in their own garden so they better get used to it and perhaps stop playing silly buggers with all the huffing, puffing and door slamming.

And buy a BBQ if you want one.

LucilleLeSueur I wish you were our neighbour, you sound very considerate.