To have been blunt with so called "friend"

[WibblyWobblyHead]

Long rant, sorry!

As the saying goes "You find out who your true friends are when you have a baby" I never believed it before.

My 'best friend' of about 15 years also has a child (age 4) so I thought she'd be understanding.
She used to come to my house all the time before I had DS and when I was pregnant would be ''oohhh i'm so excited lalala, I can't wait until he's here, I'm gonna be like an auntie to him"

Since he as born 7 1/2 months ago she's been here once, when he was about 4 months old, she stayed or about 10 mins and has never been back since. She never rings/texts and doesn't reply to mine so I've given up trying. I thought she'd be there to support me and am rather disappointed to be honest.

I saw her in Tesco a few weeks back and she was full of excuses, she said she never gets a minute to herself and is always working yet her facebook page says differently, she's always out with friends and stuff. Even if she was busy surely it wouldn't kill her to take 2 minutes out to text or even just reply.
When I saw her she said "How's the baby? I've only see him once in 7 months, I'm so ashamed of myself, I'll definitely pop up on Friday"...Needless to say there was no sign of her on Friday and no text t say she wasn't coming.

Anyway, today she emailed me for the first time in months and months just to find out some gossip about a mutual friend and it really annoyed me so I was really really blunt with her.

We're booking our wedding soon and I was going to ask her to be bridesmaid, there's no chance of that now though!

AIBU?

She's just posted photos on facebook from today, her and our other friend went to a country park with their kids.

Would just be nice to be included

How many times have you been to visit her since having your DS?

I've never heard that saying and I would disagree with it.

Did you go and visit her when she had her DC?

YANBU. You were there when she wanted you, and then she dropped you when it got too much or there was a risk you wanted something more from the friendship. Now it's awkward because you've seen her.

Drop her like a hot potato if she's being flakey. It's one quality I cannot bear.

When she has her baby I was there all the time helping out / babysitting etc that's why I thought she'd be more supportive.

Worra - I've asked her loads of times about popping up or whatever but she always says she's not in or some other excuse.

I can't be bothered anymore, seems I've been the only one trying and she's not interested x

I always seem to bring it back to this but could she be jealous. I know she has a child but she could be trying again. Clutching at straws yes but it's a possibility. 2 of my friends were pregnant a few years ago. I just cut off from them during their pregnancies. And still don't see them now.

I was going through ivf (failed) when my friend had her young baby and I still managed to stay in touch and be supportive though I can understand others might not be able to do so. But if you can't be a real friend to someone at the time when they probably need it most then you really aren't a friend at all and its best for you to drop the friendship.

A true friend would say "I'm sorry I'm being a bit rubbish but I'm TTC and failing and am finding babies a bit hard going at the moment"

Regardless of the reason someone who doesn't actually make any effort to see you isn't really a friend anymore even if they once were.