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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if you have found any unexpected perks that come with becoming a parent?

221 replies

mommabear12 · 01/04/2015 23:15

Was just wondering as I used my default excuse for not attending another tedious fourtieth birthday party "we can't get a babysitter" (haven't even asked!). How on earth did I shirk these things before ds came along?!!

OP posts:
ChaircatMiaow · 02/04/2015 09:52

Agree with the P&C parking spaces. I parked in one for the first time with my 8 week old DD last week.

My first thought was "omg this is awesome!"

Second thought was "OMG IM A MOTHER!"

HaveTeaWillSurvive · 02/04/2015 09:52

Body confidence / being relaxed in my own skin. I'm fat and will always be working on losing the weight but after giving birth in a room full of people I couldn't give a shiny shit what people think of me - shame it's taken 30 odd years to get here!

BeyondRepair · 02/04/2015 09:54

yes, being a child again and having the childhood I never had, disney, play grounds, and lots of fun, museums,...I get more excited by going to science museum and NHM than the kids.

I also get so much pleasure from introducing them to things I love, art, music, places, clothes, films, I cant wait till old enough for film, am passionate about film....I just wish I had more money to travel more extensivly with them to thailand and africa etc.

vladthedisorganised · 02/04/2015 10:20

The magnificently mad fashion sense of a 5yo DD. I must take more pictures of her outfits.

FlaviaAlbia · 02/04/2015 10:22

An alarm clock that never fails to wake you by poking your eyelids up and repeating mama mama mama Grin

Getting to play with their toys.

Being able to go to the park and feed the ducks without feeling guilty that I should be working on something.

Sunggly hugs when I don't expect them Smile

FlaviaAlbia · 02/04/2015 10:23

Snuggly! Not sunggly. That sounds painful.

Original poster
mommabear12 · 02/04/2015 10:27

Daft one but I have found a new appreciation for the moon, something that barely registered with me before!! Dd gets wildly excited whenever it comes out to see if it's a full shape or a half shape! Now on the (rare) occasions I go out of an evening I find myself looking for the moon! Have a feeling I always will Smile

OP posts:
GrouchyKiwi · 02/04/2015 10:28

Yes to the body confidence thing.

We discovered that having small children gets you fast-tracked through Shanghai Airport. Going past the 500 or so people in the queue to the empty desk was very pleasant.

leccybill · 02/04/2015 10:38

Indulging myself in full-on princess fantasy when I decorated DD's bedroom, glittery canopy and all. Sometimes I just go in and lie on her bed and pretend it's all mine.

My 'mum' friends - the best friends I ever had.
Definitely the 'can't get a babysitter/can't be arsed ruse.
Buying Dairylea Peelable cheese for myself DD

But most of all, that overwhelming sense of pride that you don't get from anything else. She is superb.

curlyweasel · 02/04/2015 10:38

Watching DD (9 years) grow into a funny and beautiful young girl (the 'I made her' moment).
Duvet/movie days.
Breastpads as coasters (and other baby chic accoutrements).
First crisp out of the packet rule before DD gets them.
DS's first ice-cream/brain freeze experience.
Learning from DD how to be kinder/more understanding.
Books I'd never read as a child myself - Mog, Tiger Who Came to Tea, Guess How Much I Love You and so on.
DS (11 months) looking at me now like he really loves me!

fleurdelacourt · 02/04/2015 10:42

great NCT friends - not sure where I'd be without them now!

also - reading bedtime stories. I love doing all the voices and am still very sad that I can no longer read "we're going on a bear hunt" to them.... Not sure how I'll cope when I'm finally kicked out of their rooms at bedtime!

FructoseTart · 02/04/2015 10:58

Having the pushchair to lean on Grin

TheJiminyConjecture · 02/04/2015 11:12

I know DH loves being able to take DD to farms/petting zoos etc and stroke the animals, bottle feed the lambs etc.

I love the fact I notice things more, probably because walking anywhere takes twice as long!

redexpat · 02/04/2015 11:15

Meeting people.

Playing with brio, marble runs etc - no idea why this is seen as dads job in other households.

Bedtime stories.

oh and the ability to smile, nod and ignore. Could NEVER do it before dc.

Totality22 · 02/04/2015 11:31

Having days where I don't have to get dressed (like tomorrow. It's going to be pissing down and online shopping will be arriving first thing so we're in all day)

Agree with girls clothes. After a DS and 7 nephews I was fed up of boys clothes I know I should have bought DS a tutu but hey hoo

A ready made excuse for anything I don't fancy doing

Being able to have a year off work [twice] and spend time doing more valuable things like parks / walks along the Thames / museums without the crowds of people.

The main perk is the love though. The love I have for my children, the love OH and I have for each other as parents and the love my kids have for me.

Christinayangstwistedsister · 02/04/2015 11:34

Movies, baking cookies, board games, biking, running about waving my wand pretending to be Harry potter ( sometimes ds even joins in)

MissBattleaxe · 02/04/2015 12:05

Cuddles that mean more than they do than from anyone else in the world, seeing the world through their eyes-and it's full of wonder! Watching Frozen, making more fairy cakes than you ever would if you weren't a parent, the friends you make at the school gate, as the OP says- using "No child care" as an excuse to dodge invitations, Christmas, cheap cinema matinees that you can sleep through.

Aridane · 02/04/2015 12:16

I'm not a mother yet (about to start IVF) so may not be in a position to qualify, but I would say the confidence to claim ownership of all school holiday times to annual leave. I was told by a colleague that now her son has started school I'm no longer allowed to book time off during holidays as she will need them all!

Am not going to type the expletive I was first going to...

Kittykatmacbill · 02/04/2015 12:19

Meeting lots of lovely new people both mum friends and getting to know lots of people in the neighbourhood.
Being able to 'justify' having a cleaner.
Cute baby clothes.
Duplo (not got to Lego yet)
Crafts
Being able to say no I cant go out for drinks, how about a coffee instead.
And how much I love them Easter Smile

Lozzle26 · 02/04/2015 12:31

My parents asking for MY permission to take my baby daughter somewhere. Still an oddity. My preschooler cousins running to me for cuddles and loves when they've bumped heads. Being able to tell my cousins of get down when climbing and not getting told off for being bossy by my aunt or mum.

MiddleAgedandConfused · 02/04/2015 12:33

Fish fingers for tea.

typetytypetypes · 02/04/2015 12:36
  • Like everyone else, DCs are conveniently grizzly/teething/tired when we don't fancy something (only fair, for all of the times they are inconveniently miserable!)
  • City farms, looks odd going without DCs Grin
  • Stashing coat on the buggy
  • Forced into a routine/organisation, we were always a bit rubbish about that before but now it's necessary with 2 pre-schoolers and we're all the better for it
  • Colouring in
  • When DCs come to me for cuddles and kisses, unprompted, never realised before how wonderful that would be
typetytypetypes · 02/04/2015 12:37

Oh, and I also feel terribly grown up even if I'm not really

dementedma · 02/04/2015 12:39

erm, no, not really....Sad

knittingbee · 02/04/2015 12:57

Watching loads of Pixar movies.
The excuse to shop for gorgeous clothes constantly as they'll always grow into them (and when you're shopping in the sale, you're actually SAVING money, yes?).
Proper crack-up moments when they say/do something hilarious (DS put his trousers on inside-out the other day… they were the right way in when I gave them to him…).
DD's little face lighting up as she looks up at me and touches my face (am at work now and want a baby cuddle so badly).