To think that this lady should not let her child poo in the play area?

[BooRadders]

Have come back from the local park today, there is a fenced off play area within a bigger open park. Whilst there, my 6 yr old pointed out that behind us (a stone seated area next to a fence with some shrubs ) a child about 4 yrs old had intentionally done a poo on the floor whilst her mother was with her. Her mother / carer then came back with a nappy bag and picked it up.....then put it in the litter bin within the play area. I was not impressed...kids run round the back of the stone seating area all the time and there are public toilets by the cafe, a 2 minute walk away.
My AIBU relates to 1) letting her poo there in the first place rather than going to the toilets or using an area outside the play park bit and 2) disposing it in the litter bin as opposed to the dog poo bins outside the area.
I have DC so am aware of the often desperate need to go....but really AIBU?

So some of you have perfect children, who have never had accidents or done something unpredictable. Op did the mum encourage the child to poo on the floor, or did the child just pull down her pants and dropped one on the floor. If she was encouraging her, than I would agree.

I don't know how toilet trained she was....but her mother was with her, helped her pull pants down then up again, then went off for a poo bag.
I do get that DC sometimes just go off and do it but I would get mine to hold on and get to the toilets. If toilet training she would have surely brought a potty and or extra pants ?

No one is going to think it is routinely ok, but some children have difficulties with this and I can well imagine there might be days when you are so worn down by it all you don't do the 'drag child to loo where s/he then refuses to go' scenario.

I'm the mother of a DS with enuresis, so I have been that parent in the supermarket/library/car park/department store/you name it whose child has peed on the floor to the contempt and disgust of everyone present. It is not easy to explain, even if I were prepared to: no, no special needs, yes, he is school age, no, I don't think it is approriate either, no I didn't 'let' him do it, he just did it, yes, of course we are trying to toilet train him....etc. And no one will give you a referral until the child reaches a certain age, so you aer stuck waiting it out. Fortunately medication is now helping DS and things are much much better.

One of his best friends is still soiling despite his parents' valiant efforts to help him control it.

So I try not to condemn too quickly.

Maybe she had already done it in her pants, and it was merely poo removal!

That is yuck!

My dd, no sn, once pooed herself without warning at around 4. She had been toilet trained for ages. We were driving, she suddenly said "I need a poo!" and out it came. I had no potty with me - why would I after nearly 18 months of being completely toilet trained? We had just arrived at our destination too, so technically there was no need for me to be wiping her down in the car park I guess.

I see children having poo accidents quite a lot, it's kind of part of being a child!

I was once on a bus when a mother let her small daughter pee on the floor of the top deck; actually pulled down her pants and helped her squat. The stream ran all the way to the back of the bus. It was before I had children and I was horrified!

Even now I do have small children of my own I'd have to be right at the end of my tether to do that. It was marginally better than letting her pee on the seat I suppose.

We did this once. In my defence the public toilets nearby were a fucking disgrace, completely vile, unhygienic, no soap in dispensers etc. so one that occasion I made the executive decision to allow an al fresco poo. We had wipes, bags, hand gel, etc. Did it behind a tree so no-one saw, and no-one was any the wiser.

I don't get too wound up about this sort of thing, as long as its cleared up probably. Most parents try to do the decent thing, and I would assume there were circumstances beyond the usual. I try not to judge on a snapshot - she could be the most considerate person in the world having a really, really literally shit day.

Mrsfumble , that is disgusting. Op at least she picked it up and disposed of it I suppose.

Frusso - yes, one of dd's classmate's mums was talking to me while we waited for them to come out of their class. It was only when I started to giggle that she noticed her 3-y-o ds was having a pee up against the bush at the side of the classroom door :)

She was absolutely mortified, but everyone else waiting went out of their way to be understanding - many of us have been there!

At that age we were still changing ds's nappy in quiet corners of parks and playgrounds with the nappy going in a bag in the nearest bin. Now it has to be on the usually disgusting floor of the disabled toilet.

I had to sluice down my sons arse once with sparking mineral water when a wee turned into much much more. Luckily we were in a sand dune so never got caught. It yes, not always possible to make it!

I was standing on a ladder cutting excess virginia creeper down and I glanced across the road. I had a second look because there was a man squatting and, presumably, doing a poo. He used grass to wipe himself. I suppose he might have been ill in some way .....

The bus incident was in London in the middle of the afternoon, so they could have jumped off the bus and caught another one a few minutes later. I was the only other person on the top deck, so I suppose the woman assumed they would get away with it (they did, I was far too shocked to say anything! These days I'd probably just offer her some wipes).

I confess to letting DS wee against trees in our local park. There are no public toilets and we're usually there for a few hours at a time. I always take him far away from the play area though.

It did backfire on me last summer when I took both children to the National Memorial in Oklahoma City. We were in the landscaped gardens, surrounded by people sitting quietly on benches and an atmosphere of respectful reflection. My attention was diverted for a moment, and when I looked up DS (then 3) was standing against a tree pulling down his trousers and about to relieve himself. I bellowed NOOOOO! and lunged towards him, yanking his trousers back up just in time. Poor little chap couldn't understand why I was so mortified as I hustled us out of there as quickly as possible!

Eveboswell that reminds me of one time when my brother went into his back garden and found a pile of human poo and a scarf covered in it, we assumed the scarf had been used to wipe the persons bum. When my ds was about 3 we were having new heating installed I opened his bedroom door to let the guy in there and my ds had pooed everywhere! Up the walls, on the bedding and I'd opened the door over a pile of it! I was mortified! I doubt I'd let a 4 year old just do it in a park, the circumstances would have to be exceptional if at all.

The kid just might have been really, really desperate. I wouldn't like to judge. At least the mum cleared it up.

Battleships......that really made me laugh about your DS....how mortifying. Sorry!
In a previous house we also found a pile of poo in the back garden...on a low brick BBQ that we'd improvised. When I was recounting the story to friends they suggested a dog might have done it. I replied that I didn't know of any dogs that could do that, then go into the shed to find, then use an old towel to wipe their bum afterwards ....but maybe it had manners after all!