To ask midwife today if I could be signed off sick from work?

[Pregnancysickleave]

I'm a regular lurker, occasional poster. NC for this reason.

I am nearly 28 weeks pregnant, leaving work in two weeks.
My work have been utterly horrible during my pregnancy, and I do mean REALLY horrible.

Nasty comments regarding my rights to be pregnant, wanting to get rid of me but legally can't. Have put me in a few dangerous situations. Infectious diseases, child related etc etc etc etc.

Unfortunately due to be nature of my job, I don't wish to disclose this as could out me, means that no HR department or real support at all has left me suffering since I announced my pregnancy at 13 weeks.

I'll get back to the purpose of my post today, I am in pain with my back, hips, legs. I have been under real stress with work and I'm so anxious about going to work every single day. I don't think my husband or family can really relate to or understand the awful nature of the atmosphere at work.

Wibu to see if the midwife feels it's a good idea to be signed off sick till my maternity leave starts in two weeks or am I being a big big baby and just need to get on with it?

I just feel completely depleted. I can't take the horrible atmosphere anymore, as well as lifting, and lots of walking when I'm pain with hips.

I would love to hear people's opinions, I think I just feel like a big skiver if I ask thanks all.

Oh OP, just do it if you're not going back. It's not worth it! Don't feel bad- they obviously don't.

Have they really followed proper procedure to make you legally redundant?

They sound a right shower of shites!

OP - I think you can start mat leave at 24 weeks. However - DON'T! If you have a genuine pregnancy related illness you are entitled to go on sick leave until your mat leave starts (or until 36 seeks when mat leave is automatically triggered).
Your situation sounds all kinds of wrong. I'm an HR adviser, feel free to PM me if you want.

Sorry typo - earliest is 29 weeks.

Thank you Confusedandemployed. I won't be taking any action against them though, as acas pointed out to me, is it worth more stress?

They don't have policies and procedures, it's one of the very few jobs when people believe they can take the piss out of you, do, and no action is taken.

I have no idea if I've been made redundant legally or not. They simply stated the role will become unnecvessary once I have left and they won't employ anyone else, I don't believe them however.

You can report to HSE regarding lack of Health and safety procedures and risk assessments. Doesn't matter who your employers are, they're not above the law. I would do this anyway to help protect others in the future.

It is unfair dismissal and sex discrimination to select a woman for redundancy because she is pregnant or on maternity leave.

www.maternityaction.org.uk/wp/advice-2/mums-dads-scenarios/pregnant/redundancy-during-pregnancy-and-maternity-leave/

I'm very annoyed that you are being treated so badly, please put yourself and your baby first, your employer has shown that they do not deserve respect or consideration.

I can't tell you what to do as only you can decide if it's the right thing for you, BUT I just wanted to offer some handholding and say you aren't on your own.

I'm 32 weeks and feeling exactly the same. I could have written your post. Just came home from work reduced to a snivelling, exhausted, hurting wreck. Half of me thinks to myself: 'you know what you have to do - go early' while the other half thinks: 'why can't I just man up and get on with this like other people do? It shouldn't be this hard!' Does that sound familiar?

People can be right arseholes around pregnant women. I've learnt that now.

I hope whatever you decide makes you happy and best of luck with the rest if your pregnancy

Fuck them to hell and back; go off sick. I would in your situation.

I understand your not wanted ng any more stress, I really do. It just makes me so mad that crap employers get away with stuff like this.
Hope the rest of your pregnancy is peaceful.

That sounds an utterly awful place to work, op. No you would not be being remotely unreasonable to ask to be signed off now.

I'm 28 weeks pregnant as well, also working somewhere I won't be returning after having the baby. Unlike you though, the people I work with haven't treated me like shit and I don't have other health concerns like SPD on top of that. So I've been lucky. In your shoes I'd ask the gp to sign me off.

i totally understand where you're coming from re the "soldier on" mentality, but I honestly think in your circumstances it isn't even remotely worth doing so.

Are you a nanny OP? I am and had something similar when I was pregnant. One parent was home and they made it clear they didn't need me to be there but I couldn't afford not to be and wouldn't back down. They knew the children had been exposed to chicken pox but didn't tell me and when I found out they acted like they didn't know pregnant women shouldn't be around chicken pox. They also made me redundant before I went on mat leave, so I couldn't accrue holiday whilst off and so I would fall a month or so short of being entitled to redundancy pay. They were difficult about me taking antenatal appointments, to the point where I had to arrange cover for the children with my family and friends to go and see the midwife. I was so sick for the first 18 weeks and they just didn't get it, my boss hadn't been sick through her pregnancies so I think they thought I was putting it on! They tried to increase my duties, the tipping point for me was a nasty text I received one weekend about something they had done but expected me to deal with. I called in sick and as I was 36 weeks my mat leave automatically kicked in. I knew they were being unfair but got to the point where I could no longer cope and needed to walk away, I think you need to call in sick for the next week and then start your mat leave early at 29 weeks, there comes a point where you have to put yourself and baby first and if you an manage by tightening your belts I would do that

Re: your redundancy, are you the only person who does your role? If there are, say, 10 of you, and they've decided they only need 9, I think all 10 are at risk of redundancy - they can't pick you just because you're pregnant

And go sick. Fuck them. You're in pain and struggling. You don't owe them anything - it's just work. It's not as important as your wellbeing or the baby.

I've not read the full thread ... But. Phone the gp. ASAP. Get yourself signed off.

I had a very similar situation (SPD, severe nausea, work made things worse, so so stressed about it all, felt bullied, I was trying to battle through - pregnancy is not an illness blah blah blah).

Anyway, I was signed off for three weeks and started mat leave early. My one regret is not taking up the gps offer to be signed off for my entire pregnancy.

I didn't go back (said i would but resigned mid maternity leave, as allowed in contract) as the stress wasn't worth it. Did consider legal route. But really life is too short.

slightly off issue, but have you got a support belt? I got one for ligament and back pain and it's been a godsend. Doesn't completely relieve it but feel loads better after wearing it for a day than when I don't....look it up on internets. Called a maternity support belt that goes under the bump and across the back.

and my work have been brilliant. They had to do a special risk assesment by law for my pregnancy which I looked at and agreed with a signature. If anything was left out I could change it. They have preempted any needs I might have had before I realised I needed them myself. I wonder if your work did a risk assessment? I think (tho not sure) it's lawfully required. Plus, you can't be the only woman they've had there that got pregnant. I would think they have treated you very unfairly and possibly unlawfully.

Yes would get signed off sick.

I have spoken to Dr I see regularly over the phone and then picked up a certificate from the surgery before now.

sorry about the rubbish employer and redundancy

This is a very late response sorry everyone. Thanks for all the helpful and kind messages. I was signed off that day, midwife was incredibly helpful. Once I explained how I was feeling she said "you owe these people nothing" and of course she is right.

livsmommy you and I have a lot in common....

Pregnancysickleave Go to your GP, get signed off and then go home, put your feet up, have a nice cup of tea and a cake and forget all about the idiots at work and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.

Your midwife won't be able to sign you off, go back to the GP who offered this to you before and explain that work is still awful and you are really suffering with the stress. They can't penalise you for it and they can't mention it on a reference either as it is a confidential health issue.

They sound like massive arseholes. I hope you get signed off today and feel better pronto - as someone who has been in a similar situation (signed off sick with work stress - wasn't PG at the time though), it all seems so much better on the first day of sick leave when you wake up with the familiar jolt of panic and dread about going in to work, only to remember your lovely sick note before you snuggle down again to sleep.

Ah - cross post. Sorry! Should rtwt... Well done you for getting signed off anyway and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy!

Tell them you have changed your mind about when you are taking Mat leave - go in for a couple of days, then go off sick, they cannot force maternity leave until 36 weeks, so you may find you end up better off.

Not sure it's very ethical, but hey, they are treating you like dog shit so get the most out of them that you can!