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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think that skinny celebrities do have a negative impact on women and girls?

408 replies

thatisnotcoffee · 26/03/2015 18:06

How could they not? When you constantly have this ideal body type pushed in your face as the only right one and and when size 14 is considered to be overweight then how can that not effect you?

Dakota Fanning is considered to be a good role model for teenagers and young women but she's a stick! How can that be healthy? She's 21 and still has the body of a child.

I watched an interview with Amanda Holden recently and she's wasting away. I also looked up Gillian Anderson recently when I found out the X Files was coming back and I was shocked to see that she's also very thin. I was even more shocked when I looked at even older pictures of her from 10-20 years ago and I realised she was very skinny even back then. I just don't understand how being that thin can be healthy tbh.

This sort of shit just makes me feel like crap and that I must be a hippo at a size 16 even though that's the average size.

OP posts:
ihatelego · 27/03/2015 22:41

I really want to put this sensitively.. but not sure if it will come across that way!

Size 14/16 is actually a perfect and healthy size for women to be. I'm a size 16 and I'm 5'4 and just over 12 stone. I am perfectly healthy! And a lot more attractive than skin and bones.

it sounds like you have problems with self esteem and are looking for someone else to blame. These women are a healthy size, i don't think size 14/16 is a healthy size.. on the bmi calculator 5ft 4 and just over 12 stone is overweight verging on obese in the red. you can't really blame women who aren't overweight for making you feel bad, and they're not an unhealthy role model for kids

FeijoaSundae · 27/03/2015 22:44

BUT I get well peed off with mums who do SFA while their kids are at exercise classes at the gym : FFS you are sat by the pool, why not get in - it gives SUCH a bad message

that's me, but I went for run that morning, and to the gym in my lunch break, so my kids aren't getting a bad message at all.

Unless the Mum (or Dad, I presume) is massively overweight, it's an odd conclusion to jump to, what with only seeing a snapshot of their day.

And I have to wonder where and when and how this 'Marilyn was a size 16' urban myth ever originated from. Confused She wasn't even vaguely a back-in-the-day size 16.

HelenaDove · 27/03/2015 22:56

Well its all about context and your own experiences i guess Im a size 16 but used to be a 28. Im proud of what ive achieved. Despite some of these attitudes.

JillyR2015 · 27/03/2015 23:05

Marilyn M moved between 8 and 10 stone and was average height. Most women look fine within those limits unless they are really tall. I think we all know that just by looking in the mirror.

milliemascara · 27/03/2015 23:10

millie did you exercise when you were young? If so, what stopped it?

Nothing stopped.

I got into bad eating habits because of my working hours, bad break up, nasty comments about weight from "friends". I just stopped caring enough to care about my body.

When I finally did start to care, exercise was hard because I was carrying 14 stone. Running was very uncomfortable and hurt my knees.

I had a PA session at the gym and she made me do squats with a kettlebell, I had to sit down and have some water because I was so close to literally being sick.

I never felt that there was this uncool stigma attached to it. I just found it physically painful to do exercise. The more weight I lost the more enjoyable it became.

traceybaybee · 27/03/2015 23:12

Im 22, 5"8 and nearly 30wks pregnant and at my first midwife appointment i was 11st 8 and my bmi was 26. I weighed myself a few days ago and im now 12st 12. Ive never been as heavy but i am pregnant after all. None of my family or friends say i look the weight i am just now. I used to really dislike my body but being pregnant has made me appreciate i am who i am and should love myself

HelenaDove · 27/03/2015 23:12

Blimey some "friends"

Alisvolatpropiis · 27/03/2015 23:22

Helena, what you've achieved is great and I don't think anybody here would say otherwise.

WorraLiberty · 27/03/2015 23:23

I don't get the point of that Daily Mail link?

Is it to tell overweight people that extreme dieting is dangerous? That losing 7 stone in 8 months just to become a model isn't healthy? I think most people know this.

Or is it to persuade overweight people that rapidly gaining 3 stone due to 'convenience food habits' is somehow less dangerous?

So she's happy to now weigh 15 stone with a poor diet at a reasonably young age.

It would/will be interesting to see what long term affect (if any) this has on her in a few years.

Either way, what I got from that link is this woman is desperate to be a model and now she's living in a country where the obesity rate is higher, it's actually possible for her to pursue a career in front of cameras.

HelenaDove · 27/03/2015 23:33

THIS.

From the link.

, but it affected my health badly, especially my gall bladder and bile ducts which literally stopped working.
'I had cramps down the right side of my body for 10 years, which made my singing career almost impossible

I got gallstones through losing weight too quickly. Had my gallbladder removed in 2003 but have crampy colicky pains which cant be explained. And Eva and i arent the only ones.

Dont get me wrong im glad ive lost the weight but ive had a lot of physical pain to get where i am.

Wotsitsareafterme · 28/03/2015 00:07

Ihatelego - more attractive than skin and bones. Again thin bashing is fine....

WorraLiberty · 28/03/2015 00:22

So in order to make lots of money in a modelling career, someone decided to go on a dangerous diet.

How is that relevant to the thread HelenaDove? Confused

HelenaDove · 28/03/2015 00:30

Worra i went on slimming world Lost 7 stone in 7 months (took over a year to lose the final 3 stone and got gallbladder disease through losing the weight too fast SLIMMING WORLD not lighter life or cambridge. Two doctors and my surgeon told me it was caused by losing weight too fast. I tried to slow it down but then would just end up staying the same so it was either lose it fast or not at all.

Its relevant to the thread because if we are going to discuss obesity we also have to discuss the aftermath of extreme weight loss.

Because the physical pain emotional pain social adjustment and your mind adjusting to those changes doesnt just stop when the weight loss is achieved and the fuss dies down and/or the accolades end.

HelenaDove · 28/03/2015 00:32

The surgeon i mentioned is the one who took my gall bladder out.

I havent had any plastic/cosmetic surgery due to weight loss ....before someone comes out with this gem!

WorraLiberty · 28/03/2015 00:40

Its relevant to the thread because if we are going to discuss obesity we also have to discuss the aftermath of extreme weight loss.

Why?

I'm sorry but I don't see why we would have to discuss that?

I'm not saying we shouldn't of course, because there are extremes in every subject, but I'm not sure why you'd think you'd have to link to an image obsessed woman who once made money out of being thin and is now making money out of being fat?

She really isn't the best example to use here as it's clear she's pinning her whole 'career' on simply being photographed and has admitted to doing what it takes (however dangerous) to get where she wants to be.

prawnballs · 28/03/2015 00:53

This arguement will never be won - why does it matter about size Confused ??
I've got a bit of meat on me ( and I'm tall) but constantly told I'm a beauty :-/ yet my best friend is a size 6 and gorgeous - it doesn't matter what freakin size clothes anyone wears...health and attractiveness boils down to a lot more than that Hmm

MistressMia · 28/03/2015 01:09

We are all responsible for our own food choices, but Agent does make a valid point about the role of the food industry.

Crap food is sold at ludicrously cheap prices. It is very easy to succumb to the lure of 4 snickers for £1 rather than 2 bunches of Asparagus for £3.

Those on a limited income will be more susceptible to these offers than those who can afford to buy a wide variety of the more expensive healthier offerings. Yes, you can buy cheaper veg such as carrots etc but really it would get a bit depressing eating the same old boring staples.

I think there needs to be punitive levels of VAT put on confectionary, bakery, crisps etc so that these things truly revert back to being occasional treats rather than everyday continuous grazing fodder.

HelenaDove · 28/03/2015 02:18

Its relevant to the thread because if we are going to discuss obesity we also have to discuss the aftermath of extreme weight loss.

Why?

I'm sorry but I don't see why we would have to discuss that?

Because it all ties into the same thing. It all comes down to being healthy does it not?

CharlieSierra · 28/03/2015 08:18

Size 14/16 is actually a perfect and healthy size for women to be. I'm a size 16 and I'm 5'4 and just over 12 stone. I am perfectly healthy! And a lot more attractive than skin and bones

No you are on the border of obese and overweight - the same as me. I have at least 2 more stone to lose. I look a lot better now at size 14 than I did at size 18 six months or so ago, but that doesn't alter the fact that I still have a way to go to achieve a healthy weight. Clothing sizes too are a red herring these days, as a young woman I weighed 9st 4 on average and was a size 12 usually, at my current weight I would have needed at least an 18.

PtolemysNeedle · 28/03/2015 08:45

Size 14/16 is actually a perfect and healthy size for women to be. I'm a size 16 and I'm 5'4 and just over 12 stone. I am perfectly healthy! And a lot more attractive than skin and bones

More attractive to who?

Are you saying that no one could be attracted to people who have very slim bodies when their bones show through skin like they are supposed to? I'm sure you don't mean that, because you'd clearly be wrong, so why say it unless you want to make yourself feel better at the expense of people who have a different body shape to you?

I would be undoubtably fat if I got to a size 14 and I'm not short. Three stone of unnecessary fat would not make me more attractive.

ihatelego · 28/03/2015 09:01

Wotsitsareafterme I was quoting the op that's not my quote!

ihatelego · 28/03/2015 09:02

read my comment below Hmm

LokiBear · 28/03/2015 09:07

It isn't 'skinny women' who cause low self esteem or set a bad example. It is the media and it's photo shopping over use. Every image you see is airbrushed. 'Imperfections' are removed. Even 'skinny' models are contoured, given larger breasts/longer legs/bigger eyes. We can't reach 'perfect' because 'perfect' is a computer generated image. Beautiful women come in all shapes and sizes.

BigChocFrenzy · 28/03/2015 09:14

Weight loss needs to be at a sensible rate to retain health and muscle. Regular weightbearing exercise is also necessary to avoid muscle loss.

Whatever diet you choose, 7 stone in 7 months is too fast and risks health problems, unless under medical supervision.

Rapid initial weight loss is common for someone very overweight.
Longterm, however, l kg weekly is a safe rate to aim for, Unfortunately, too many folk feel desperate to maintain the initial rush, hence cut their calories too drastically and maybe cut out healthy food groups too.
Your body and organs need time to process the changes and also the fat being lost.
Weight takes time to put on, so needs time and patience to take off safely.

I would only call the rate of a weight loss "extreme," not the actual amount of weight lost.

btw: If you are worried about weight gain as a side effect of medication, best to discuss possible alternatives with your doctor; also discuss whether you should adjust food intake to compensate. Don't just throw away meds, ignore your condition and let doctors think you are following their advice.