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AIBU?

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Original poster

Waitress commenting on how much I eat

90 replies

Fugghetaboutit · 25/03/2015 07:20

Hmm So, I was out with friend the other day and ordered breakfast, a huge plate came and it was delicious (spinach on sourdough, avocado and poached egg with sausages and hellim for anyone interested Smile)
I ate quite a lot of it but couldn't finish it all (left a sausage and half the toast) and when the waitress came to collect it she said 'you haven't eaten anything!' In a way my mother would. I felt suitably embarrassed as I had to mumble something about having a small stomach.

When I left I got thinking that this has happened to me before but only by women servers. Has it happened to anyone else? Is it their place to comment on how much you eat?

OP posts:
Topseyt · 25/03/2015 07:24

Never happened to me, and no, it isn't for a waitress to pass comment.

OwlCapone · 25/03/2015 07:24

She might simply have wondered whether there was something wrong with it. This is something I would file away under "Things That Really Don't Matter"

patterkiller · 25/03/2015 07:24

I get it all the time. I'm a grazer and eat little and often so never manage huge plates.

I've had everything from tutting, asking if I want to speak to the chef to the best one from an Italian waiter, who nodded at DH and said "it's good she wants to keep slim for you" I have over time learned to ignore. I pick my battles in life, this isn't one of them. Your breakfast sounds bloody lovely.

OwlCapone · 25/03/2015 07:25

I've had it before and have simply replied "It was lovely but I am absolutely full" in a cheery tone.

Icimoi · 25/03/2015 07:26

I want to know where you get a breakfast like that! It sounds great.

Original poster
Fugghetaboutit · 25/03/2015 07:27

Owl Grin I was thinking this is really not an important issue when typing it but thought i would share.

I was cheery about it but then after felt embarrassed and thought why should I have to explain why I haven't finished to her? Weird.

OP posts:
Only1scoop · 25/03/2015 07:27

She might have thought you didn't like it?

Aridane · 25/03/2015 07:28

Yes - and when this has happened to me, it's because the server / cook is concerned that I may not have liked the food, not because they are in the habit of commenting on customers' eating habits...

Original poster
Fugghetaboutit · 25/03/2015 07:28

Ici are you in London? I'll share :)

OP posts:
FatherHenderson · 25/03/2015 07:30

I get this and I hate it.

I know it sounds silly but I find it embarrassing. I don't want to justify my lack of appetite to anyone.

I also think that being a grown up means that you don't have to finish everything on your plate, and you don't have to justify yourself to anyone if you don't like the taste.

Although I do the cheery "I'm just full!" Thing too.

Original poster
Fugghetaboutit · 25/03/2015 07:30

It definitely wasn't because she was concerned about the food, because as soon as she said it she didn't say it in a concerned way, more of a 'pffff' way really and didn't wait for a reply and just scooped our plates and went. They aren't known for politeness there but the food's good.

OP posts:
Tizwailor · 25/03/2015 07:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AlternativeTentacles · 25/03/2015 07:34

I don't say 'I'm full' I say 'you served far too much, are you making any profit at all on that?'.

anniepanniepears · 25/03/2015 07:34

absolutely none of her business

TerrorAustralis · 25/03/2015 07:34

I've had that before. I just say 'It was too much for me'.

MinceSpy · 25/03/2015 07:35

Your breakfast sound yummy but I couldn't eat all that either. I get comments and just say that the food was lovely but I'm full.

Snozberry · 25/03/2015 07:35

Some people are OTT about food waste, I have had people try and force me to finish my plate when I’m full. Never a waitress though, but I do eat for Britain when I’m out. She was rude.

Tizwailor · 25/03/2015 07:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Snozberry · 25/03/2015 07:36

What you had on your plate sounds like three breakfasts to me (not seeing the portion size though) so I’d be surprised if it was regularly finished

OwlCapone · 25/03/2015 07:37

Oh, I do my fair share of "worrying" about remarks that probably had no real negativity behind them. Usually they are just throwaway comments that really have no depth of meaning behind them at all.

Mrsmorton · 25/03/2015 07:43

I'm in London and I want to know!!

Mrsmorton · 25/03/2015 07:43

I would have scoffed the lot btw if you want to come for breakfast with me? I can help you avoid those comments!!

Clobbered · 25/03/2015 07:45

I'm nowhere near London but I still want to know!
Rude.

Bunbaker · 25/03/2015 07:46

I had to google hellim (I know it as halloumi), but it sounds like a huge breakfast, and I wouldn't have been able to eat it all either.

The waitress was BU to comment and you were BU to feel upset over her comment.

MissYamabuki · 25/03/2015 07:46

I can't eat huge portions, I'm more of a grazer and this happens to me often when eating out. Like pp said, waiters usually just want to know f there was a problem - more often than not it goes:
"Was everything all right with the food?"
"Yes, it was lovely but there was too much for me"
"OK"
Used to bother me but I couldn't care less these days. From your post it sounds like the person who served you needs to work on her manners.

I want to egg on sourdough toast NOW