To want a thankyou?

[Iamatotalandutteridiot]

OK, open to all answers as it's perfectly possible I'm being utterly irrational... but... when you do something EXTRA special for your partner... what's the response likely to be?

For me, it's 'well done' - like, yeah, you did good job, but a job I expected you to do anyway.

It's never 'thanks' 'I really appreciate that' 'that's saved me a ton of bother' 'You didn't have to do that'...

All of the above would be 'appropriate' (in that I DIDN'T have to do it, it DID save him a ton of bother, HE should appreciate it and he SHOULD be thankful) but no... 'Oh, well done' and move on...

AIBU?

Is it cleaning the blades on the wind turbine?
Has he fracked enough to last the fortnight?
Dragging the leaves off the swimming pool?

Yes, I do Littlemonsterrule and if I didn't it would be questioned. Last year, I went a bit more extravagant in what I spent, and it was questioned and stopped. I do have to ask to spend 'his' money.

Why don't I expect the same in return? I have no idea.

And, to be honest, there are some things I just think men are better suited to.

I feel really cross with myself now.

YANBU. I would encourage him strongly to do whatever it is this coming weekend and keep on until it is done. Don't take it on board, you stepped in only temporarily.

Look op the whole thread will now be de railed as we all want to know what the actual fuck you did!

Your setup sounds v unhappy OP.

Sorry OP his behaviour sounds very controlling and unkind, he shouldn't treat you like this.

lama even if you are a SAHM there should be some jobs your DH does (I'm refusing to say 'man jobs in principle).

I was a SAHM for years and my DH still did a number of things round the house and garden. You sound resentful that you are bring taken for granted and from what you've said, you probably are.

Go find your DH, sit down with him and tell him that you are hurt and why.

My grandma always said 'you get what you settle for' - it's time to decide exactly what your settle for.

Yanbu!