About 12mo DD's lunch?

[chocolatescones]

Very prepared to be told I'm BU/ precious but basically my PIL look after our 12mo DD one day a week. They're both nice and are very obliging, they follow Her routine and I'm sure if we asked them to change anything they would.

The only thing I just started thinking about, and tbh I'm only very slightly unsure about it, is that they seem to be taking her out for lunch every week which is obviously nice but means she's eating adult style cheesey beans with lots of salt each time (they tell me she has that). I'm not precious at all about eating out- we have a cafe/ pub lunch out with her maybe every fortnight and she has some of mine as she doesn't eat enough for her own meal. So aware I could be a bit hypocritical here... The rest of the time she has home cooked food by me or nursery so all fine.

So is it ok for her to eat adult meals out, WIBU to pack up some low salt beans for them to take out with them each week? And should I be taking her own home cooked meal out with us when we go out as well?

Yes, you are being very PFB. How kind of your ILs to look after your DD once a week, one meal out really isn't going to hurt at all and will just make you like like a complete control freak if you say anything.

I agree with Ragwort - this parenting thing goes on a long time and it's easier if you relax a bit.

Thanks both I am generally pretty relaxed as I say I just give her what I order and make sure it's ok for her but I just wanted to check the regular meals out (with them and with us) aren't really bad for her.

And Ragwort I know it's kind of them, the whole tone of my post was meant to suggest they're very nice and I'm just a bit unsure about this one issue.

Looking at it objectively, the salt intake guidance for a 12 mo is 2g of salt per day and it is the average over the course of a week that you're looking at.

1 salty meal in a week is totally fine, more even provided the average is ok. they're not adding salt to her meal, or feeling her so much shes getting a taste for it and that meal won't likely be total daily salt amount anyway.

If I know we are going out to eat, I'd tailor the rest of the day to be lower salt, so less bread, cheese and ham etc.

Thanks Littlef00t that's really helpful think I just had a 'am I being a bad mother' panic!

You will have a lot worse things to worry about. They are not feeding her salty crisps, chocolate and fizzy pop or anything. Enjoy the free childcare

It's a great learning opportunity for a baby to eat out, experience the environment but also food they haven't tasted before too.

I guess it's everything in moderation.

Pick your battles op, this isn't one of them. Just wait till she starts on the crisps, chocolate ,lollies etc :)

Can't really understand why people are commenting on OP's childcare arrangements and implying she isn't grateful..projecting much!

OP, I think one or two meals a week like this are absolutely fine and just balance things out with her evening meal that day. Only thing I would say is can they mix it up a bit and choose something other than cheesey beans, there must be other stuff on the menu.

I think the experience is worth some salt. I take my 18mo old out each week and always have. Waiting for food to come and ordering something that might not be exactly like it s at home is all part of the learning just like sitting nicely and controlling mess.

It's fine. Leave them alone to enjoy each others' company.

All of my three loved food similar to that from a much younger age than your daughter. Not every day, but in moderation. It hasn't done them any harm at all and I never gave it a second thought.

Thanks everyone! I completely agree on the experience being good for her and we all love taking her out for meals :-) I'll chill out now!

Yay! I love an aibu that goes aibu? Yabu. Ok thanks, iabu, I'll change.

Job done

What is 'adult style cheesy beans'? It wouldn't occur to me that cheese and baked beans was a meal for anyone.

I don't think you're being pfb, I'm on baby 4 and I'd still think twice in a situ like this. I think it's caring parenting to give thought to a 1 year olds salt intake.

But having said that I agree with pps, one salty meal a week can't really be harming her!

If it helps I take my 3 year old and 1 year old out to lunch every Monday. They love it and so do I!

It has never occurred to me to worry about the salt levels in the food they eat once a week. I always look at what they've eaten across a week.

I think the whole learning experience of eating out with her grandparents and then her parents outweighs the the worry about salt. Your little one eats 21 meals a week so one meal isn't going to have too much of an impact. Maybe the GP's could vary the menu choices a little bit each week.

Thanks op am hungry now!

Sounds likè a lovely set up. Don't rock the boat.

There's a twinge of reasonableness there. We are lucky enough to have grandparent childcare- we give them money, of course. However dd has learned the terrible habit of layering everything in salt from fil. We use losodium salt at home to stem the habit and had gently firm words with them. But FIL is pretty unrelenting although he tells dd not to copy him.
BTW to the poster who hadn't heard of it: beans on toast topped with cheese is delicious - dd hates melted cheese so she never has it.

Never heard of cheesy beans!!

You've never lived.

It is a fairly reasonable meal once in a while too.

Presumably the op means on a jacket potato or toast, bellwether? Ditto to what everyone else has said, OP, it's great and fine. Mine ate the same as us from when they started weaning. One meal that's saltier than usual is fine. And cheesy beans quite balanced and healthy overall :-)

Come the summer she'll be eating soil, grass and bread that's been put out for the birds if she gets near it. A few beans won't matter at all :)