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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

People accused of sex crimes shouldn't be given anonymity

538 replies

GallicGarlic · 22/03/2015 12:17

I am positively astonished that, as they face sex crime allegations, MPs say sex crime suspects deserve anonymity.

This will mean no e-fit pictures of suspects, no CCTV releases, no calls for other victims to come forward. AIBU to think this is jolly convenient for serial perpetrators? And to ask you to sign a petition?

OP posts:
HootyMcTooty · 23/03/2015 11:23

I know, I'm not at all surprised.

itsbetterthanabox · 23/03/2015 15:00

I'm always confused when people say it ruins the rapists lives. I wish it would but it doesn't! I know people that have raped women and everyone thinks they didn't do it as the woman was just a lying 'bitch' with a vendetta. New girlfriends believe that, friends, family. It just means not only was the woman assaulted but she's now being ostracised too. And as the police are very much on the side of the rapist that makes it 10 times worse.
At my school a girl claimed to have been having sex with a teacher (statutory rape) and it was ignored and many other teachers refused to teach her! The teacher in question is and has continued to be sexually innapropriate with students. I saw the sexually explicit messages he wrote to another girl on MySpace. But nothing is ever done as girls just love drama apparently Hmm

GallicGarlic · 23/03/2015 15:09

Well, so far we've had most of the usual misunderstandings:

? The law says a man must be arrested if accused of rape - False. Police dismiss about a third of complaints without even recording them. A high proportion of the rest are abandoned for one reason or another.

? As soon as a man's accused, everyone brands him a rapist - False. If this was the case, we wouldn't need a "We Believe You" campaign, would we? Truth is: as soon as a man's accused, everyone brands his accuser a liar.

? Loads of people know a man whose life was utterly destroyed by a false accusation - Unlikely. Of the cases that are investigated, less than 3% are labelled false accusations. Not all of those, by any means, will destroy the accused's life. So how come the very, very few that do suffer all have pals on Mumsnet?

? Being accused of a sex crime means instant dismissal for men in teaching/social work/etc - False.

? Being accused of a sex crime means the teacher/social worker/etc won't be able to get another job, even if found not guilty - False.

? Social Services can treat an accused person as if they were an offender, even if found not guilty - True. If SS has strong reasons to suspect abuse, they're obliged to protect vulnerable people from them. Even here, as we know, they tend to be too lenient with some infamous results.

? Women and children habitually claim sexual abuse to get their own back - False. It probably happens regularly, but remember the 62,000 claims that are not recorded as crimes and the 12,760 that never get to court.

:) I'm fed up with this now, and haven't even got halfway through the list!

www.mumsnet.com/campaigns/we-believe-you-campaign-rape-myths-busted

OP posts:
GallicGarlic · 23/03/2015 15:11

Shock Other teachers refused to teach her? Good lord, box. Poor girl.

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atomich01 · 23/03/2015 16:19

Sorry but I won't be signing either. A friend's son was falsly accused of rape. He got such a bad time he had to move, and change his job. It does ruin lives. The girl who cried wolf on him got away scot free. It's worse if the person is accused of a sex crime than other crimes, a rapist is always seen as worse than a burglar or whatever like that, purely BECAUSE it's a sexual crime. Innocent until proven guilty!!!

TheBlackRider · 23/03/2015 16:59

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TheBlackRider · 23/03/2015 17:03

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TheBlackRider · 23/03/2015 17:14

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GallicGarlic · 23/03/2015 18:47

Think about the number of people you know, personally, who've been accused of a sex crime - reported to the police, whether or not a complaint was pursued. Now think about how many people you know who've been raped, sexually assaulted, molested or groped, had a narrow escape, had 'forced sex' or been 'taken advantage of', been flashed at or wanked over, been followed by someone demanding sex, been tricked or bullied into sexual activity whilst a child, or had photos of their body shared without permission.

Even if you live the most sheltered life imaginable, I doubt your score is 0/0. For most people it will be less than 3 accused & more than 15 abused.

This demonstrates that the vast, vast majority of sex offences go unreported. Which makes it all the more unlikely that folks are being randomly accused for no reason, doesn't it?

OP posts:
itsbetterthanabox · 23/03/2015 21:31

Atomich01 how do you know your friends son was falsely accused? How do you know he didn't rape the woman?

whoopsbunny · 23/03/2015 21:47

I'd like to know that too. They all say they were falsely accused, most, if not all, mothers don't believe their sons are rapists.

There are damaging myths about perpetrators too. For example, Ched Evans cannot possibly be a rapist, he could have any woman he wanted. The son of my friend can't possibly be a rapist, such a nice lad...

Rapists are shady, unattractive, loners in rape myths. They don't have family or friends, they don't have wives, girlfriends, sisters, mothers, daughters. They don't have good jobs, they are not pillars of the 'community'.

TheBlackRider · 23/03/2015 22:00

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HootyMcTooty · 23/03/2015 22:08

BlackRider Flowers

850Pro · 23/03/2015 22:13

TheBlackRider, so your saying that there are no men falsely accused?

ScOffasDyke · 23/03/2015 22:14

I don't know anyone who's been raped, molested, groped etc. i was with a group of friends once and apparently a man flashed at us, but I didn't notice.

I haven't led a sheltered life and I was mugged once.

TheBlackRider · 23/03/2015 22:15

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TheBlackRider · 23/03/2015 22:16

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mariamin · 23/03/2015 22:16

ScOffasDyke - You will do. It is too common for you not to know any woman affected by any of those things.

TheBlackRider · 23/03/2015 22:18

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850Pro · 23/03/2015 22:18

"Yes, false accusations do happen, but they are rare. If the complaint is designated 'no crime', or the complainant prosecuted, it was likely false. But most claims of 'false allegations' are actually just examples of rapists not seeing justice due to lack of evidence."

www.theguardian.com/law/2014/dec/01/109-women-prosecuted-false-rape-allegations

109 in 5 years isnt rare

TheBlackRider · 23/03/2015 22:19

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whoopsbunny · 23/03/2015 22:21

It's a damn sight rarer than the 390,000 rapes that happened in those 5 years.

whoopsbunny · 23/03/2015 22:22

Of which only a pitiful 6% got a conviction.

whoopsbunny · 23/03/2015 22:23

*6% of those who reported to the police - the majority will never even report.

TheBlackRider · 23/03/2015 22:24

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