...to wish my dog wouldn't think of her bloody stomach when I'm having sex?

[MatriarchalDreams]

Living room this evening, fire lit, lights low, few drinks, DH and I move from three seater sofa (where dogs are) to two seater sofa, losing clothes on the way. Well on my way to a very nice orgasm thank-you-very-much when I hear Stupid Brown Dog get off the sofa and start rummaging through the pocket of my trousers to get the dog biscuits in my pocket. So now I'm thinking about whether she's ripping the pocket open to get them or daintily picking them out, listening carefully to see whether I can hear the ripping of fabric, AIBU to just want her to give us a few mins in peace without thinking of her stomach?!

We used to have a cat who was utterly rampant and would try to shag anything despite having had the snip. DH and I were just getting down to it late one night in an empty lounge when Sexcat came thundering in through the cat flap, stared at us and miaowed encouragingly.

Was you doing it doggy style.

We can't have sex when the cats are in the room since one took a swipe at DH's cock one afternoon after he closed the curtains and was about to get on the bed with bobbing errection. Caught the tip. He screeched and there was quite a bit of blood. Killed the moment, scared the cat. Lots of fuss about what turned out to be a tiny pin prick the injury, not his cock

They are now banned from any room in which sex is about to take place.

Lulu your poor DH

cats on the bed staring at you, is my worst one

Far TMI

eeuw

Lol lulu, you have made my day .

No way I could have sex with my dogs in the room, i can imagine them licking my face whilst I'm trying to do the deed.

The cat gets kicked off the bed too.

Our dog once burst into the room and started enthusiastically licking DP when we were having sex. The little pervert.

I don't have a dog but I imagine dogs are quite enthusiastic voyeurs, ears cocked and all excitable.

I've had cats and they, on the other hand, tend to look on in disdain and disgust but would never consider removing themselves from the situation, they just carry on giving you the evils.

Charlotte - your bouncing ginger kitten has reminded dh and I of the time when one of our cats strolled nonchalantly up Dh's back, during sex, and peered enquiringly at me over his shoulder. Put me right off, it did!

My sister and her partner were having sex and her jack russel ran into the room and started dry humping them

DP and I can't even kiss without our dog leaping up and joining in, sticking his tongue in our mouths

At XP's house, NDN just used to dump her dog on us at the weekends while she worked which was fine by us as we adored the pooch. Early afternoon we get distracted and end up DTD upstairs. Dog is wandering around happily ignoring us.

There's a knock on the back door and NDN marches in. Her DDog goes into paroxysms of delight, races around madly, knocks over table lamp and then grabs my discarded knickers to present to its owner

As an addendum to the account I posted above; the next afternoon I was in the kitchen chopping vegetables and DH appeared with his jeans unzipped holding his cock out saying ' Have a look at the scratch on my cock from yesterday.'

Me 'Oh take it away DH. Stop making a fuss about nothing'.

DH Exit stage left muttering about lack of sympathy.

Small brown cat winked at me.

Oh tooo funny these are! Hope this thread ends up in Classics...