After a messy break up and a lot of arguments we have had a reasonable contact pattern working for a few months..
Ex hubby has the kids every Friday night, I get them back at 2 every second Saturday and 5 the other Saturday so we both get some Saturday afternoons with them..
The only thing I have found hard about this is missing being involved with younger son's swimming classes (we used to take turns to watch but ex moved him to a 9.30am Saturday class)..
So at hand back today ex says oh guess what you can watch blah's lesson next week and then have him back after because I'm going to the rugby with my brother..
Now normally I would have relished a whole Saturday with the kids and to see the class, but not expecting to have them until 5 I had booked onto a course that day..
I clarified with ex and yes he fully expected me to cancel..
I realise he doesn't get to see a lot of his brother (who works abroad) but aibu to expect to at least be asked rather than told?
He went off in a huff and I've spent the afternoon feeling thoroughly rotten.. Especially as tomorrow is the first mothers day since the break up and I was feeling pretty fragile anyway..
And Ps, I have never asked him to take the kids while I've gone to any kind of social thing, so it definitely isn't tit for tat in that way.