To not go on this Hen Do today?

[ThinkIveBeenHacked]

We have had a death in the family. It is still incredibly raw. I dont want to go and put a Face on. Everyone keeps saying it will be a "welcome distraction". I just feel sick at the thought of having to go and be chipper about life.

It isnt an immediate close friend, none of whom I have seen since the death as, funny enough, I dont feel like seeing anyone.

Oh just don't go - it sounds like the last thing you need. They'll understand. Sorry for your loss.

Of course you don't have to go. Sorry to hear of your loss.

So sorry for your loss. Would it cause a big problem if you didn't go e.g. losing out on money, an obvious empty seat, etc? Have you spoken to the Bride about it? If you don't want to go, don't.

For you.

There's nothing worse than siting about with a fake smile all day.

Don't go. And for your loss.

Id lose the money but its only a small sum, and tbh even if it were four times that still wouldnt motivate me.

It was DHs sister who died, and I know he will think Im not going today for him but it isnt. Its for me.

You are absolutely NBU. Give yourself time to grieve in peace, friends should try to understand. I know that life goes on but it's ok for you to withdraw from it for a while.

I'm sorry for your loss

"Everyone" is obviously not bereaved and they can piss off.

Op I'm so sorry.

Is the bride aware what's happened I'm sure she would understand.

Absolutely reasonable and totally understandable. Do not go.

I am so sorry Hacked
yadnbu

I'm sorry for your loss. If you don't want to go to this hen night then don't

Ok am going to message the Bride.

I will then present it to DH as a done deal so he doesnt have to waste time attempting to talk me around

Dont go if you dont want to

It doesnt sit well with me to cancel plans Ive made and let people down. I like to be able to honour my commitments.

I just cant face it.

YA most definitely NBU!!!!
Stay home with your DH and grieve in peace. There is no right or wrong way to deal with these things but if you force yourself to go you will only feel worse.
You must do what's right for you - any decent friend, close or otherwise, will understand completely. And if they don't then not going to their hen do would still be the right thing for LOTS of other reasons!!!
I'm so sorry for your loss

Sorry for your loss, I'm sure that the bride will understand. Try not to be offended if payment for non-attendance is requested - though I'd really like to hope that that wouldn't be an issue raised by anyone, and if it is it's only asked for through surprise at your cancellation and not actually required iyswim?

Ive allready prepaid for the whole paid for portion of the hen. The rest was just drinks ordered on the night. If I had any money outstanding Id send it.

If they don't understand, then I don't think they are good friends at all to be honest.

I hope you didn't send anything other than your apologies, Hacked