to believe that my child might cry going into school FOREVER?

[BouleSheet]

My child started school last September and has cried pretty much every morning since. He likes school, has friends and a lovely teacher. It is so stressful and everything I read about these scenarios say oh it's just a phase and won't last....but it has: SIX MONTHS!!! I can imagine him as a 12 year old bawling going into school - I cannot imagine him hopping out of the car with a cheery "bye mum" and not a backward glance.
I have to walk him to the door as the school is on a busy road and he'd run from the school if I didn't but at the door he clings and weeps and can get hysterical. It helps if one of the staff take him from me and engage with me but that doesn't always happen and I think their patience is worn thin at this stage. I don't want to bring him to school anymore but there is no-one else to do it.
Please tell me tales to prove IABU!

I used to talk to my ds about what we would do after school, that really helped. We baked a lot of little cakes in the first few weeks of school as he got really excited by doing that and it seemed to help lift his mood a bit before school started.

DD3 cried through to year 2. Every. Single. Morning. Just didn't like being away from home. Then got a super new teacher year 2 who gave her 2 mins extra attention in the mornings and bingo it stopped!

My sister cried every day for the first year - with me being at the same school and her being happy during the day!
Soon as she went back into year 1 after summer she didn't cry once. I think it had become a bit of a habit rather than her actually being upset so the change of class/routine/big summer break made a fresh start and stopped the crying routine.

DS is in Yr 1. He cried every single day until just before Christmas holiday. He literally had to be peeled from me. Then he had a few weeks of going in without tears but looking pretty anxious. No he goes in happily and just looks happy and settled in the playground and getting into line. I never believed it would happen. I think it has taken him this long to feel comfortable and not overwhelmed by the playground and school. It is horrible so I really feel for you. I do think the school need to get a plan in place for you.

Ok, I had this from ds1 for pretty much two years if you count nursery discounting the expulsion from play group for too much crying. It was utterly draining.

The good news is, it passes. My oh so, fragile little boy grew and blossomed. He became confident. He did well at school. Better than well. He loved uni so much he almost cried when he had to leave after graduating..

Hang on. It does get better. My only advice is not to push. If he enjoys school then he probably just hates the moment of parting from you and it will, very gradually improve.

My oldest daughter cried every single day for the first school year. Every single day.
It was hard and upsetting but I just had to start pretending she wasn't upset. I acted completely normal and smiley and told her to have a lovely day, gave her a kiss goodbye then turned and walked away.

When she started back at school after the summer holidays she didn't cry at school drop off ever again.
(I had of course checked there were no issues at school to make her upset a rational thing.)
It will get better.

My dd2 (now 14) was like this all through reception - sadly she still cries some mornings (although rarely) . She just doesn't like school and is a bit of a home body who would rather be home with mummy - probably not what you wanted to hear sorry

Dd is now doing her gcse's. She doesn't cry about going but she still hates school!

My Ds started bnursery at 18 months and cried every single day till he left. He was peeled off me for introductory days at school..He has never once cried since he started school.. ( not been left anyway)

It does end...How is she once you have left? I would ask to speak to the teachers how they can help..

It is really tough leaving a crying child. As mine went on for years I kind of got used to it in the sense I knew he had stopped crying once I was out of sight so know it was for my benefit

I think in some cases OP children are simply not ready for school at 4 years old. Sometimes as well intended as they are I don't think it matters what strategies are put into place. When they want mum no one else comes close. In certain countries they don't start school till they're about 7...., but we have no choice do we. We have to send them...screaming or not...I would scream and vomit going into school clinging on to mum.. I settled down in year 1 though. Some children just take longer than others. I know it doesn't seem like it now, but he will settle but it could take a few years.

Have a chat with the teacher/ TA, and see if you can come up with a plan together. My DD was allowed to take a teddy so long as we didn't have a clingy tearful performance at the door (she was seeing how long she could prevent me from leaving by clinging and crying and working herself into hysterics). He's still so little, but when he's calm, have you asked him what would help him to feel brave about going to school? Do they have provision for children who aren't quite ready? At DD's school reception children who need to are welcome to go back to nursery for a bit.