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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to cut up friut for my 11 & 13yos

115 replies

ClassicTron · 09/03/2015 19:33

I still cut up fruit for my 13 & 11yos.

They eat well, but since going to secondary school where it seems to be the norm not to eat any fruit or veg at all, it's not always easy to make sure they their 5 in the 2 meals I still have control of. TBH, I'm not convinced about 5 a day anyway, all the research says it should be more...

If I ask them if they'd like some fruit they'll say no. I have a full fruit bowl but they don't touch it. If I slice up a couple of pieces and leave it next to whatever screen they're using, it soon disappears - I have to assume it's being eaten.

So, stupidly pandering and babying them, or sensible way to make sure they get what they need?

OP posts:

silverbangles66 · 09/03/2015 20:23

thornrose my thoughts exactly, but more eloquently said!

Am so happy to see so many kind mothers doing things for the children they love.

Years ago, I got a royal shoeing when I said I put my kids' washing away on MN.

I didn't come back for six months, watched them like a hawk for the moral degeneracy and Fauntleroy behaviour I had encouraged and no doubt they had passed on to other children.

I think I got away with it

GotToBeInItToWinIt · 09/03/2015 20:31

Ah I wish someone would do this for me! Fruit is much more appealing all cut up nicely than sitting in a lump in the fruit bowl.

YANBU, I'm 100% sure it takes more than cutting up some fruit to raise a spoilt, entitled monster. DH sometimes fetches me drinks even when I'm sitting doing nothing . It's nice to be nice.

treaclesoda · 09/03/2015 20:31

My eldest is 8 and I do loads of stuff for her that I know she could do herself if I made her. She's got plenty of years ahead to have to fend for herself and if she can look back and think 'I loved it when I'd had a tough day at school and mum used to do x, y or z for me instead of making me do it myself' then I'm ok with that. She's not showing any signs so far of treating me like a servant. If she starts to do so then I may have to revise my stance. But in the meantime I'll stick with it.

WineCowboy · 09/03/2015 20:34

ignoreme we've got one of them! super easy.

OP of course you are not BU! I still cut fruit up for my DDs, we call it a 'monkey bowl' and they get loads of bits of fruit chopped up in it.

It's no problem and they eat it! Wobbly teeth started the whole cutting up fruit malarkey and I still do, never thought about not doing it, I don't care!

AvonCallingBarksdale · 09/03/2015 20:36

I do shed loads of stuff for my DC - cut up fruit, put away their washing. They're lovely people and I enjoy doing stuff for them. I eat more fruit if it's cut and naicely presented, so it makes sense. OP YANBU, by any stretch.

TheFairyCaravan · 09/03/2015 20:36

I love the super competitive "who can be the toughest mum" these threads attract. grin I like being secure enough to do lovely little things for dd without being terrified I'm raising a spoilt monster!

I am not being competitive "who can be the toughest mum", I wouldn't come anywhere near in that contest for a start. I do a lot of nice things for my kids, and they do a lot of nice things back for me.

Trills · 09/03/2015 20:37

I would eat more fruit if it were cut up and put near me.

I'm 30.

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes · 09/03/2015 20:37

Yes, wobbly teeth is another thing, I just asked DS if he'd like an apple and he said no for that reason.

Trills · 09/03/2015 20:37

I am currently eating a cutted up apple.

It's much nicer than eating a whole one with my teeth.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 09/03/2015 20:41

There's nothing lovelier to munch on than carrots cut up into sticks, much nicer than a boring old carrot.

thornrose · 09/03/2015 20:41

TheFairy I don't believe I mentioned you by name. I think this is a case of "if the cap fits"!

AnnieMoor · 09/03/2015 20:43

Chop it up & call it a fruit salad. Makes it a bit more appetising.

We frequently do this for ours and they're 12 & 16.

Joyfulldeathsquad · 09/03/2015 20:43

Oh God please stop!!

My granny still does this for my 25 year old brother! She is over the moon if he eats a fucking banana - because he eats properly now he has moved in with her.

If you like serving your kids - fine. Just don't bring them up to expect others to do the same for them.

Preciousbane · 09/03/2015 20:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheFairyCaravan · 09/03/2015 20:49

You didn't need to thornrose you were very obviously addressing the posters who disagree with the OP and I answered you as the cap doesn't fit because I am not a tough mum and I was not being competitive in the slightest.

rollmeover · 09/03/2015 20:49

Aw, i think it is a lovely thing to do. As someone upthread said, its these small kindnesses that show our love for one another.

Maybe one day when they are all grow up with kids of their own they will do the very same, you know, to be nice.

Keep spreading the cutted up love, OP.

TheFairyCaravan · 09/03/2015 20:50

precious one of the things I miss most about DS1, since he moved out, is he always made me a cup of Earl Grey in the afternoons.

SwallowsInSpring · 09/03/2015 20:51

Aww, my dad used to do exactly this for us. A little plate would appear next to us (unnoticed as our eyes were fixed to the screen in front of us), with a few satsuma segments, apple slices etc, ad they were yummy. Ate them mindlessly, pretty much never helped ourselves from the fruit bowl. Love fruit now, AND I can even chop it up for myself and Dh in a similarly appetising and tempting fashion if I only partially feel like eating fruit. And overall I am a non lazy person. Mostly.

Carry on! Lucky children.

thornrose · 09/03/2015 20:54

Ok so if you're not competitive or a tough mum why do you think I meant you then?

Trinpy · 09/03/2015 20:57

Dh's mum still does this for him and he will be 38 in a couple of months! Unfortunately, at home he cba to cut up fruit for himself.

MoreBeta · 09/03/2015 20:58

I still do it for a 15 ad 13 year old. For exactly the same reasons as the OP. Indeed I could have written exactly the same post.

I still clean their shoes, DW picks up and washes their clothes, I painted their bedrooms while they went skiing. I am painting the guest bedroom now before their exchange student friend arrives. I am supervising the builders converting the basement for them to have a 'chill room'.

DS1 has however asked if he can start cooking his own food. When he is capable of putting one spoon of sugar in his tea with spilling two spoons and leaving it on the counter top I might let him.

Sometimes its just easier to give in and do things for them they cant/wont do for themselves.

They will leave home one day.

Artandco · 09/03/2015 21:03

Yes dh and I both do this, for the children and each other. Dh brought ds2 (3) and myself strawberries and ice cream in the bath this evening! Was lovely, and don't mind if that makes us spoilt.

I also gave ds1 (5) a foot massage before bed. Because he's 5, he asked for one, and I couldn't think of a reason why not.

It's nice to do random things for others and them back in return

Ilovehamabeads · 09/03/2015 21:05

I still prefer cut up fruit at the age of 40, and also cut it for my DCs. I would never pick an ape out of the bowl and just eat it, but will happily munch on slices of it.

Ilovehamabeads · 09/03/2015 21:06

Ape? Apple!! Sorry, not endorsing the slicing and eating of primates.

PrimalLass · 09/03/2015 21:06

I'll still be doing it too. Why the feck not? I make their other meals after all.

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