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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

... To ask people to be nice?

49 replies

MrsNutella · 07/03/2015 21:16

Just that really. A bit of "do unto others as you would have done unto you" and my Mother's favourite "if you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything"

It's just been swimming around my head today. A bit like paying it forward. If everyone took the time to try and do one nice thing for someone else, wouldn't that be something?

I think it's because the news seems so dark and sad and bad right now, I can't ignore the news but I'd sort of like to do something against that darkness... Does that make sense or sound like I am just a giant hippy?

I did something nice for a friend this week, it wasn't huge. Just a small thing. But it made me feel wonderful and it was something that meant a lot to her and she really appreciated it.

OP posts:
Cantbelievethisishappening · 07/03/2015 21:17

If only life was that simple.

livefastlove · 07/03/2015 21:19

This is mumsnet so you should really ask us to be naice, and pass the gin.

mommy2ash · 07/03/2015 21:19

surely the vast majority of people are nice to others on a regular basis. its not possible to be nice all the time.

WorraLiberty · 07/03/2015 21:20

YANBU to do nice things for other people

YABU to start a thread asking other people to do nice things, because it sounds a bit patronising, although I'm sure you didn't mean it to.

There are lots of nice people in the world, silently doing nice things for other people, but we tend (as human beings) to focus more on the not so nice.

BuzzardBird · 07/03/2015 21:21

So if someone comes on here and acts like a total twat we should be kind?

expatinscotland · 07/03/2015 21:21

It's very easy to avoid the news. I do it all the time. Just don't have a telly. Now, here's your bong back. Thanks.

ifdaryldiesweriot · 07/03/2015 21:22

I'm almost immune to what happens in the news. I won't let terrorism dictate my life and I certainly won't live in fear. Doesn't mean I wouldn't help in any way I could however.

I have no idea what you are trying to achieve from cliches that everyone knows.

I agree that if only life was that simple.

The80sweregreat · 07/03/2015 21:23

I do try to do good deeds. Long story, but offered a pound to a stranger at the train ticket booth, she was so grateful, never seen such a reaction but i wanted to help. Helped a couple lug a pushchair down some steps near fenchurch st station once, not noble winning prize things, but i do try!

mrsfuzzy · 07/03/2015 21:23

mrsnut, with you on this one, it's such a good feeling knowing that you've helped someone, mind you some people don't get it when you hold doors open or step aside to let them pass, they either ignore you or give you a look. times like that i think is it worth it ?

ifdaryldiesweriot · 07/03/2015 21:24

YABU to start a thread asking other people to do nice things, because it sounds a bit patronising, although I'm sure you didn't mean it to.

Agree your message is extremely patronising, whether it was your intention or not.

26Point2Miles · 07/03/2015 21:25

Oh dear, threads not going the way op had intended!!

Be nice everyone!

CaulkheadUpNorth · 07/03/2015 21:25

Today I was in the supermarket and a woman asked a member of staff to find something. Whilst she was gone, the woman put the stock out to help.
It was such a nice thing to do, and the staff member kept saying "that's the nicest thing anyone has ever done".

That challenged me to be nicer.

BathshebaDarkstone · 07/03/2015 21:25

I hope I'm at least nice to my DC, DH, the staff, kids and parents at my DC's school most of the time.

WorraLiberty · 07/03/2015 21:25

Of course it's worth it if you've been brought up with good manners mrsfuzzy. Other people's reactions or ignorance shouldn't put you off.

Original poster
MrsNutella · 07/03/2015 21:27

cantbelieve I wish life were more simple.

livefast you are absolutely right!

OP posts:
Morloth · 07/03/2015 21:27

The news is bad because that is news.

All of the everyday nice stuff is normal and there not 'news'.

And yes, you sound patronizing.

Koalafications · 07/03/2015 21:27

Agree with Worra it's a bit patronising. And smug.

Maybe you didn't mean it that way, OP. But it's how it comes across.

mrsfuzzy · 07/03/2015 21:28

some posters on here sound a bit irritable tonight, but no,you can't let bad stuff get to you but then sharing the good stuff is pretty good.

expatinscotland · 07/03/2015 21:30

Sings Kumbaya.

Anyone for a voddy and tonic?

ifdaryldiesweriot · 07/03/2015 21:30

Lol guess I'm fucking invisible then OP. Thought you wanted to be nice?

Practice what you preach.

ilovesooty · 07/03/2015 21:31

I think I'm a good team member at work and I'll go the extra mile to help out. I think I'm polite to most people I interact with.

I can't bring myself to be nice to idiots and bigots though.

Original poster
MrsNutella · 07/03/2015 21:32

ifdary of course the bad things happening shouldn't dictate anyone's life; I think my argument is the collective effect of all the negative press.
And sorry to be patronising. Flowers

mrsFuzzy it's always worth it. For you, not for them.

26 thanks Smile

caulk that's it, like a challenge to be nice.

bath I'm sure you are.

OP posts:
BuzzardBird · 07/03/2015 21:32

I spend a lot of time in relationships, if someone comes on and acts really badly I have to give them a piece of my mind

Catmint · 07/03/2015 21:34

I didn't interpret the OP as patronising or smug.

I think I do try to be nice and that extends to not bothering to point out the hundreds of posts on MN that may be patronising or smug.

Keep on being kind OP and know that there are many others trying to do the same.

ifdaryldiesweriot · 07/03/2015 21:34

I spend a lot of time in relationships, if someone comes on and acts really badly I have to give them a piece of my mind

Nice to see you Samantha.