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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think modern life is rubbish

115 replies

maryjolisalondon · 02/03/2015 16:16

Working full time, paying huge amounts of rent / mortgage just to have two days off a week. Only getting a few weeks holiday a year. Traffic and getting to work and school then making food often only leaves an hour or two a day free. Then if you get sick more and more companies only pay SSP. For people under 40 its also looking like retiring even in your 70s won't be possible for the average Joe.

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lilyanna812 · 02/03/2015 16:18

I think modern life is great.....if u live in rural Indian where as a woman you would be supressed, with beatings which are accepted and not allowed to work, but stay home and cook dinner....u will think modern day London is the best place on Earth

lilyanna812 · 02/03/2015 16:20

ps working full time is great if you love your job. I couldn't imagine not working....I love working and being a mummy. I don't mind paying for my home as I love my home, it is decorated just how me and DH like it and everything is a symbol of our love and life together. I don't drive...so traffic isn't a problem.
I get 33 days holiday a year, including study leave and dependency leave (5 days), I love cooking (although my mum cooks too and brings dinner round twice a week, and once a week we eat out)

I can live every day of my life in a loop and still love it

change ur perspective....life is beautiful

maryjolisalondon · 02/03/2015 16:20

Uck I was worried this would turn into misery trumps

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maryjolisalondon · 02/03/2015 16:22

If only getting a job and home you love with plenty of holiday was that easy for everyone.

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TheMoa · 02/03/2015 16:23

I love modern life in the UK.

When reading about various historical periods, I can't think of another time in which my standard of living would have been better than it is now.

I'd quite like to live in Sweden, but even that is doable.

Gotta love options, and in the UK, and most developed countries, there are many! Grin

Sirzy · 02/03/2015 16:25

I would say on the whole modern life is better than that in most eras previous. Of course there will always be those who struggle but for most people things are better/safer.

I don't think having to work and pay for your home means things are worse now

ShaynePunim · 02/03/2015 16:25

YABU and YANBU.

Yes it feels difficult and exhausting sometimes, and it can feel like we are rats, BUT 'modern' life also means progress in medicine, social rights etc...including more holidays than many in the world, and definitely more holidays than here a few generations ago!

JCDenton · 02/03/2015 16:25

I would much much rather be earning a little under the median wage, as I do, in modern times than any other time in history. 400 years ago people who went down into London's sewers to look for discarded money and material were considered to do relatively well.

BarbarianMum · 02/03/2015 16:27

Modern life as compared to -what? There are plenty of things i don't like about it but its hard to sit here in the west and pine for the good old days of famine and disease. Or the 19 century when women couldn't vote, or the lovely 1950s with rationing, a housing shortage and people dying of smoking related diseases in great numbers.

0x530x610x750x630x79 · 02/03/2015 16:33

yeah i am sooo jealous of those working class victorians, 20 to a house, a different family in each room.
18 hour days for everyone over the age of 6. NO HOLIDAYS AT ALL, NO BREAKS.
If you couldn't find a job or were unfit to work the workhouse was such a joy to live...

Ragwort · 02/03/2015 16:36

What are you comparing your life to?

What choices have you made?

It's very easy to blame 'life' when in fact sometimes it is down to choices we have or haven't made.

meglet · 02/03/2015 16:44

33 days leave plus study leave and your mum cooking for you twice a week is pretty cushy.

Trills · 02/03/2015 16:47

Oh do get a grip.

Only a few weeks' holiday a year.

Only two days off a week.

Only a couple of hours free on days when you are working.

What exactly are you comparing yourself to that you think that's a bad deal?

FlabbyMummy · 02/03/2015 16:56

We have safe, fresh water coming out of taps.
In most towns/Cities we have open spaces like parks where we can take our children to for free.
We have the NHS.
We have Supermarkets brimming with affordable food.
We can leave our homes and feel fairly safe.
We have a free education available to all children.

I think we are very lucky, compared to other countries, even my Grand Parents.

It sounds like you are fed up? Write a list of what you don't like about your life, see what you can change on that list? and book something fun, it doesn't have to cost money, howabout gettign osme friends around for a drink and watch some comedy? or have a funny theme, get dressed up? Get your kids out on a sleepover?

littlemslazybones · 02/03/2015 16:57

Dishwasher
Washing Machine
Dryer
Ventolin
Car
Netflix

Happy days

fromparistoberlin73 · 02/03/2015 17:04

its all SHIT

can you tell its a monday

in seriousness, yes we are better off obviously than a woman that risks rape. No brainer

But generations in the future, will they look at as crazy motherfuckers working ALL THE TIME for what seems to be nothing? suspect they might well do

ragged · 02/03/2015 17:11

Most people used to work heavy manual jobs until they could retire at 65 and die at 69. Yeah, great deal. Would so love to have them conditions back.

murmuration · 02/03/2015 17:29

It's a hard one. I think that modern times are far better than most times in history. But there seem to be trends over the last few decades that make is seem like things are going downhill. I don't positively know the facts behind this, though.

I know that in the US (where I'm from, so that's where I'm more aware of recent history), the pattern of working more and more hours per week went up starting in the 1980's, and based on some graphs I've found on the internet :) reaching 1950's levels by the 21st-century. Late 1970's looked the best there (with a massive drop in the 30s, which I assume would be due to labour reform, and a massive spike during WWII).

It seems 'buying power' based on the average wage has dropped as well. Certainly in our recent economic downturn. It seems like the equivalent level of employment nowadays produces less benefit than it did for our parents. I remember when I first moved out my parents telling me that my rent should be no more than 25% of my income -- and were shocked to see that the cheapest shared rentals in town were still well over 50% (after dividing amongst tenants).

It also feels like there is a lot of hate in the modern world, but I wonder if it's only more visible -- e.g., I, who am not a target of most of such hate, am aware of it now, whereas 30-40 years ago only the victims would have been.

And in the 1970s, while there was a lot more overt oppression of women in the workplace, etc., it was also reasonable to be fighting for equality and women's rights. Now it seems the attitude is often 'it's fixed, stop complaining' when statistics on statistics show that that's not true.

So on a broad scale, YABU, as life now is safer, healthier, and better quality for a much broader portion of society than most times in human history. But I'm not sure if we're talking about the space of a few decades. I'm slightly worried that we are slowly losing a lot of the advantages we spent much of the 20th century accruing.

redexpat · 02/03/2015 18:11

Are you just feeling a bit fed up abnd in need of a moan? If so AIBU mihjt not be the best place

maryjolisalondon · 02/03/2015 18:43

Well I'm comparing it to the last few decades. Houses are stupidity expensive, both parents have to work, the gap his growing between the haves and have nots, pension ages has increased, pension annuities have fallen, the debt is being racked up for our great grandchildren to pay, rise of zero hours contracts etc.

And I'm pissed that I will have to go to work tomorrow as bi can't afford another day off sick, even though I need it.

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ElsaLitcha · 02/03/2015 18:47

Modern life is good. I'd have been left to rot 100 years ago when I went through rough times. It's only shit if you play the comparison game.

Camembertha · 02/03/2015 18:53

You need to make changes!

Find a different career, or house, or husband (ltb Wink just kidding!

Friends of mine are emigrating to New Zealand, to find a better life, though you don't have to move quite that far.

For us moving to Hampshire improved our life Grin

Change your life around.

just do it

Camembertha · 02/03/2015 18:54

Aibu is great place for a moan, IMO, you can get into a proper fight, and sometimes that's just what you need.

maryjolisalondon · 02/03/2015 18:54

Oh I know, but it does suck donkey balls that as a society we are going backwards.

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ssd · 02/03/2015 18:55

I hate threads like these

the op wants a moan and why the hell not

then some one comes on and says how great her life is so we should all be happy and everyone seems to pile in with the stories of competitive misery elsewhere or stories of being back in history when it was all shit

sheesh cant someone just have a moan these days Hmm