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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU not to want to pay a random bill??

33 replies

Miracularity · 02/03/2015 15:41

Some weeks ago I needed somewhere for my pony to be for a few weeks and my mother's housekeeper very kindly offered to have her in her field with ten other ponies (could have 10, 11 or 12 - there were a lot!) Obviously I was very grateful and we agreed a grass livery price. She has since stopped working for my mother (unrelated).

All she had to do with my pony was feed her. That is literally it. I left feed when she arrived and took a bag of feed up once during this time (pony is several hours away from me). I had been feeding her this feed for several months prior to moving her and therefore knew how much she ate. She actually doesn't need hard feed, especially when she's in a field, rugged up, not working and has plenty of haylage. Anyway, this lady texted me to say her feed had run out (?!) so she was feeding my pony from her own supply. I said ok, fine.

The time has now come to move her and this lady has presented me with a bill for £180 (excluding livery) for water, hay and feed. I could not for the life of me see why I should have a bill of this size and queried it, and she has now kicked off badly saying that she's not dishonest or greedy but they've had loads of hay and she's been using her own feed. And she'd added £20 for her time and fuel! I said that I took the livery costs to include her time and fuel. I honestly cannot see how my pony alone has eaten £160 of hay and feed - when I'd left enough for her.

She keeps hassling me for money saying that she's desperate and I'm suspicious that she's asking for a vastly inflated sum of money. My mother has said that this lady is trustworthy and just to pay it as it's such a small sum of money. Well it isn't to me! I think she's saying it to avoid any embarrassment; she's quite insecure so she needs everyone to like her.

Was I BU to query it? Should I just pay it?? I don't want to get into an argument with this lady and I don't want to dodge bills that I'm responsible for. But neither do I want to have the piss taken out of me and it seems like they've conjured up a fictional bill because they need money. I'm at a loss. And she's kicked off so quickly that it makes me suspicious. If the situation were reversed I think I would have been upfront about the costs as we went along and kept receipts. But maybe I'm in the wrong......?

OP posts:

InfinitySeven · 02/03/2015 15:46

When she told you that your feed had run out, did you take any action? Agree to take more food?

If you did nothing, she may have taken that as an expectation on your part that she was going to keep feeding your horse. She probably therefore provided a decent amount of food and hay because you could well have kicked off if your horse hadn't been fed enough when you were now paying someone to do it.

I have no idea how much horse feed costs, but if your mum thinks she is trustworthy and you did agree to allow her to feed your horse without discussing costs, I'm not sure there is going to be an easy way to refuse to pay. Is your horse still there at the moment?

Moreisnnogedag · 02/03/2015 15:55

That's a lot really. How much is the feed she was using? Tbh if she was working for your mom still if try and be more diplomatic but seeing as she's not, I'd ask for an itemised bill including receipts for feed.

How much does hay round yours cost?? That's close to 50 bales round ours.

crocodiledundeelady · 02/03/2015 16:00

I think the itemised bill is an excellent idea. You might not be able to get out of the 20 quid for fuel and time if it wasn't explicitly agreed that this would be included, but that sounds insane for hay and feed. She's taking the piss, don't feel bad about pushing it.

Bair · 02/03/2015 16:00

I have no idea how much keeping a horse costs so cannot comment.

However you must not let this opportunity pass to say 'Get off your Gourmet Fed High Horse.

Original poster

Miracularity · 02/03/2015 16:02

When the feed ran out I said ok, feed her whatever you have. I was clear that she has no strict dietary requirements. But the period of time between her feed running out and now is a matter of weeks, maybe 3. And she normally has just a handful of non-heating food. £180!

OP posts:

crocodiledundeelady · 02/03/2015 16:05

Can you ask what brand of dry feed was used then find out the price of that and hay? Then work out what feeding him should have cost for that length of time. If you go in with a reasonable figure she may just accept it.

Whippet81 · 02/03/2015 16:14

How long was your pony there for? My 13.2hh fatty is stabled and he probably costs £10 a week to feed - at most so I think she is taking the piss if she is saying he has eaten that much.

Lesson learnt though - you should have got something in writing -
It wasn't officially grass livery it was sort of full grass livery if you get what I mean - field kept but she had to look after him.

If I was looking after someone's pony in a field I would probably charge in the region of £50 a week whereas hiring a bit of field and looking after them yourself is normally about £10 a week? This is because it's not just a case of throwing a bit of feed once a day - I check 2/3 times a day, take rugs off etc so it takes time. I would only do a favour and look after for cost alone for my closest friend who would do the same for me - I have been taken advantage of too many times.

The price she gave you should have taken all that into account if she knew you wouldn't be there so she is BU to suddenly slap a bill on you and you were BU not making sure all this was included.

FWIW my pony when on part livery costs me about £400 a month including feed and bedding (not shoes or vets or extras such as grooming or exercising)
So depending on what you've already paid her you're not done badly really.

FlabbyMummy · 02/03/2015 16:16

how about replacing the food and hay when you collect the Pony and give a token 50?

Frozendoesmyheadin · 02/03/2015 16:16

£180 would buy 45 bales of hay where I am & would feed my 17.1 Irish Draught for about 9 weeks. My 11.2 pony only gets fed Fast Fibre (choke problems) & that would buy 18 bags which would last 18 weeks or so. It's does sound like she's charging you way more than she should! Did she leave her job on bad terms with your mum & is seeing this as compensation?

TheWitTank · 02/03/2015 16:30

How much were you paying for grass livery? Was it for two weeks I presume? My nearest yard is £210 pcm for grass diy, with use of facilities though. I wouldn't begrudge the women £20 for fuel/time/buggering about, but I would probably query what food she had been using etc to justify the rest of the costs. Some people have very different ideas about what a small amount of feed/hay is!

Charlesroi · 02/03/2015 16:33

I always understood grass livery to mean pony gets to graze in the field and you do everything else inc. checking, vet, shoeing, feeding, rugging and hay.
If you had some other documented arrangement then fair enough but I think you are going to have to pay her for the food. She had a duty of care to your pony and just couldn't leave him without care or food, whether you believed he needed it or not (you weren't there)
Pay up and move on.

Original poster

Miracularity · 02/03/2015 18:23

She did nothing in terms of care. Literally just fed her. She's a 13.2hh New Forest. Her rug stayed on the entire time and they were never groomed or ridden or brought in for any reason. So whilst the pony was in the field, she didn't do anything, bar feeding. There was no kind of care programme. No shoeing, grooming, worming, etc.

Her livery at her previous yard was £290/pcm for assisted DIY.

I don't mind paying what I owe but I'm damn well not having her take advantage of me, which is what I believe she's doing. I just can't see any way that she needs to charge me £180 ON TOP of livery. And actually, it's me that calls it livery, she phrased it as 'rent', which I took to mean my share of renting the field - which isn't going to be what she charged me!

OP posts:

Original poster

Miracularity · 02/03/2015 18:24

And no, not bad terms as far as I know.

OP posts:

Cantbelievethisishappening · 02/03/2015 18:34

Ask her for a break down. That does sound very high. A bag of nuts is less than a tenner isn't it. How much hay was she getting? If she was in a field with ten other ponies I can't see how she is eating that much hay on her own.

If she is charging that much as well as livery I would certainly not be paying for it without a detailed break down.

BitchBags · 02/03/2015 18:40

£210 for grass diy? I pay £210 for my two ponies together for diy with two stables and full use of facilities. It crazy how much the prices vary!
op I think you should definitely ask for an itemised bill. there is no way it's cost that much to feed!

Welshmaenad · 02/03/2015 18:46

Jesus Christ. We have some land, which is let out to a family friend who keeps two ponies on it, DIY grass livery with exclusive use of 4.5 acres, and she pays us £10 a week.

I am missing a fucking trick here.

Original poster

Miracularity · 02/03/2015 19:04

Lol Welsh! :) The pony is actually in Wales.

The total she wants from me is £270 (I've paid £90) God help me if she reads this because it is completely obvious who I am!

OK, I will ask for a detailed breakdown with receipts. I actually don't think that's unreasonable. I mean, when you're asked to pay a sum of money it's fairly logical to expect a bill....?

OP posts:

NeedABumChange · 02/03/2015 19:33

I would turn up when collecting pony with a bale of hay and bag of feed. She's taking the piss. Her fuel bill would also need to be divided by 12 to account for the other ponies.

Welshmaenad · 02/03/2015 19:45

Dursh, if I'd known I'd have had it, got my tenant to feed it and just comped her livery. I'm soft like that.

Welshmaenad · 02/03/2015 19:46

Also, yes, exorbitant and unjustifiable. Pay her not.

Whippet81 · 02/03/2015 20:02

So what would have happened if she had gone up one morning and your pony had been kicked? Or was hopping lame? Surely you left her with some sort of responsibility for the pony?

How long was the pony there? Weeks without taking it's rug off to check it or changing it if it got soaked?

Original poster

Miracularity · 02/03/2015 20:14

She will have been there 9 weeks in total by the time I collect her.

If the pony had needed attention she would have been on the phone to me. Like she was when her rug got ripped - I went straight up with a brand new rug and sorted the pony out.

OP posts:

Iwouldratherbemuckingout · 02/03/2015 20:16

I pay £110 a month for retirement grass livery - checked over, rugs checked. In winter I pay £55 for haylage - no hard feed. If something was amiss, they will sort and then charge for their time. Based in Cheshire.

It sounds as if this person may have seen an opportunity .......

FlameFireNora · 02/03/2015 20:27

If your pony was in a field with others and you wanted her fed surely that would mean catching her and putting her somewhere while she ate, then letting her back in with the others ? Every day (twice a day ?) That's quite a bit of time/handling, and she's been there 9 weeks ?, plus cost of extra feed and a share of hay, I make that £30 a week, sorry I wouldn't do it for that !

londonrach · 02/03/2015 20:36

No idea re costs of a pony but 9 weeks is a long time. Did you have a written agreement. What do people normally charge per week in your area. Sorry as said before no idea re costs but if paying £180 for 9 weeks thats £20 per week to store a pony. Not sure if that expensive or not.

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