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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to hate people "helpfully" flashing their lights.

50 replies

ChampagneTastes · 26/02/2015 20:38

I'm probably being unreasonable. The last couple of days I've had people flashing lights at me as I drive to and from work. At first I thought it was directed at someone else but then it happened when there were no other cars on the road. I checked my lights: they were not on full beam and appeared to be working correctly. I was not, as far as I can tell, driving like an arse. So what all these people actually achieved was simply making me massively paranoid but in no way enlightened as to what the problem might be. Unless we develop some form of basic morse code to pass on messages with our lights, it really isn't very helpful to flash at people is it?

OP posts:
Original poster
ChampagneTastes · 26/02/2015 20:40

I don't know where the random semi-colon came from.

OP posts:
CalleighDoodle · 26/02/2015 20:41

Speedtraps?

Koalafications · 26/02/2015 20:41

Sometimes people flash to let other drivers know tat there are police around. I had someone flash their lights as a deer ad escaped from a field and was running loose in the road.

meglet · 26/02/2015 20:42

yanbu.

BatmanLovesPeopleHeShouldnt · 26/02/2015 20:43

I hate it for a different reason - it temporarily impairs my vision.

pressone · 26/02/2015 20:45

There are so many potholes round where I live that I thought people were flashing their lights at me - like you I checked, not on high beam, none of my lights were out, no police (or deer that I noticed - sheep are always getting onto the road so did look for those) and it turns out that it was just their lights tilting as their cars went up and down the horrible road surface!

ILovePud · 26/02/2015 20:45

I know what you mean it makes me paranoid as to whether there is a problem with my car too. However I have been responsible for this too I remember getting a hire car where the headlights were controlled by the stalks in the position where the screen wash was in my car and I went round accidently flashing people all week Blush.

PiddlePoo · 26/02/2015 20:45

I did this on my way home from work today because there was a plastic plod holding up one of those speed gun things at oncoming traffic.

Original poster
ChampagneTastes · 26/02/2015 20:45

Wasn't speed traps - it was definitely aimed specifically at me and happened at various times/places. Lots of people do use lights to indicate a problem ahead so all these people flashing have made me drive really slowly in case I'm about to go around a corner and find a crash or something. But because there's no way of knowing the purpose of the flashing, all it does is make me panic.

OP posts:
BumpAndGrind · 26/02/2015 20:47

If it is a few on coming cars at the same time flashing I think it is safe to assume there is a hazard ahead.

Original poster
ChampagneTastes · 26/02/2015 20:48

I thought it was potholes (and I think some flashing WAS that but I was paranoid by that point) but then I saw someone very deliberately turn them right off and on so definite deliberate flashing.

DH has been out for half an hour fiddling with the lights to see if that could be it but it looks like it's possibly my bumper which is a little the worse for wear having killed a pheasant a couple of weeks ago.

OP posts:
Original poster
ChampagneTastes · 26/02/2015 20:48

But there WASN'T a hazard!

OP posts:
taxi4ballet · 26/02/2015 20:50

There's a lot of speed bumps around these parts (mostly unlit small villages) and at night it is very easy to think someone is flashing you when they are actually only going over a speed bump instead.

Causes no end of confusion, especially if there are parked cars and the oncoming traffic thinks you are flashing to give way to them - everyone invariably then meets in the middle!

ManOfSpiel · 26/02/2015 20:51

I thought flashing was usually code for either Police or a serious incident/accident.

It's saved my bacon before so find it quite helpful but understand why you find it undesirable.

Original poster
ChampagneTastes · 26/02/2015 20:54

Seriously - there was NO hazard. Nothing. It was definitely people flashing at me. I'm not just being paranoid, honestly!

OP posts:
gobbynorthernbird · 26/02/2015 20:56

Maybe you drive like a cunt.

Original poster
ChampagneTastes · 26/02/2015 20:58

Gobby Grin

No honestly I don't!

OP posts:
gobbynorthernbird · 26/02/2015 21:01

Are you sure? Are you in fact my mother?

GetSober · 26/02/2015 21:03

I was wondering if one or both of your headlights is misaligned, as that was the case with my car when I first bought it and I got flashed CONSTANTLY until I got it fixed, but that's prob exactly what your DH is checking now?

Original poster
ChampagneTastes · 26/02/2015 21:06

I'm pretty certain I'm not your mother Gobby. As for the other, my DH assures me he hasn't witnessed any cuntishness in my driving.

OP posts:
Original poster
ChampagneTastes · 26/02/2015 21:06

Getsober what does it look like when it's misaligned? Does it mean one of the lights is not dipped?

OP posts:
southbucks77 · 26/02/2015 21:07

Same as GetSober - I was getting flashed and then I worked out my headlights were set too high. In my car there is a little roller by the steering wheel which I had accidentally pushed up.

post · 26/02/2015 21:08

Have you got your fog lights on?

Hippee · 26/02/2015 21:10

I get this a lot champagne and it makes me paranoid too. I suspect that the main beam is a bit high, but I have had it checked at the garage a couple of times and they say it's fine.

londonrach · 26/02/2015 21:11

I dont mind. Lovely person last week flashed at me. Kindly let me in from side road before the flashing and did thanked him so double checked everything then realised id just come from lit supermarket and had forgotten to put my lights on. Really thanked him then. lovely guy. Mind you had a lady who like me from lit supermarket yesterday who i flashed, she put her lights on 2 seconds later...and thanked me....

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