to consider flouncing off to a hotel by myself for a week or two?

[Mintyy]

Massive row with dh last night/this morning. Usual issues.

Long day at work, boss grumpy cunt, nightmare drive home. Get home at least half an hour later than usual. Dh is working tonight so as soon as I get home I have to start making dinner.

Child 1 (age 11) is downstairs when I get in and we exchange a few pleasantries about his day.

Child 2 (age 14) is upstairs in her room. I call up hello but get no reply (not unusual because she has those big earphones on her i-pod and listens to music while reading/doing homework).

Cook dinner, serve it up about 45 minutes later. Child 2 finally appears, not in the least concerned that she hasn't seen me/doesn't actually know that I'm home.

I deliberately see what will happen if I make no effort at conversation ... and neither of them says a single word! they just silently stuff baked salmon and egg fried rice with peas down themselves until dd announces that she'd like ice cream for pudding.

Feeling.taken.for.granted.is.a.fucking.understatement!

I have got a lot of money saved up in my personal account and could go away for a week to a hotel without even feeling a blip.

Should I? Just to show em??

Get yourself a take away. Go to your bedroom with computer/book whatever. Ignore them until bedtime, when you kill the power and leave them sitting in the dark.

11 and 14, they should be cooking at least twice a week for you or with you if they are not competent. Do they do anything around the house?

Browsing hotels now. I don't want a spa. I want a good hotel restaurant, a beach, and an interesting town nearby with hopefully a plethora of second hand bookshops.

Can I come too?

San Diego, although it's conference season there atm. Still, if you go next week DH will be there, and sometimes Stevie Wonder turns up to their conference. (Tru dat)

Go to Lyme Regis for a long weekend, I love it there.

lyme is lovely, but i would go the other way down the coast towards Seaton and Beer.

Lyme has too many hills and the parking is a nightmare unless you use the park and ride :) and the town/beach are too busy for peace and quiet.

I love Beer, cant beat sitting on the pebbles watching the fishing boats.

My BFF and I go away for a week every year. Last year we did it twice. Disneyland (Calif) is our 'retreat'. We come home refreshed, relaxed, and happy. We're lucky we can afford it, but if we couldn't we'd probably just book ourselves a week at the local Marriott. It's the totally getting away and being able to focus on yourself that does it.

Every one (mummies and daddies/husbands and wives) should get away on their own or with a good friend at least once a year. We shouldn't be slaves to our families or to ourselves.

I did that about 18 month ago. It was bliss even if only an overnight. I swam, I had a massage, I ate nice food, I drank a G&T in peace, I even got to read some of my book!! I took 2 days leave from work for it too, and that was also bliss.

I have just had DH hang up the phone on me as he is annoyed. He is doing the school run this morning (I am not long back from Fridays off but he insisted on not extending our M0n-Thurs morning lady to Fridays as well that he would do it). DD is not long awake and grumpy. She has changed her mind and wants to play the hurling match tomorrow instead of going to sailing club. He now wants to cancel going to his professional body meeting to take her - to allow me to relax. But I had previously rearranged my nurses' apt to get stitches out as he remembered the prof body mtg earlier in the week - and am now getting them out a couple of hours before flying off to a business meeting on Monday.

So me telling him that he needs to go to prof body mtg, as I had changed my arrangements for him, did not go down well. As he "can't be arsed". He hung up the phone on me.

We are working too hard, DD is over committed (but still wants more activities - especially guitar) and DH will not agree on what we are doing with/for her (we found out the week after paying for sailing club that all her gaelic matches would be on Saturday afternoons - clashing with sailing club - and Dh is now rowing back on what we had agreed as priorities). And it doesn't help that the following week she not only has a match clashing with sailing in the afternoon, but a party request for that morning that we've had to reject as it is the meeting preparing for Cub scout investiture so we can't miss that one.

I am already in work an hour BTW - in order to get things done and get home on time for school collection tonight.

Your children's behaviour sounds fairly normal. Are you sure your not projecting the issues you and your husband are having on to them?

But you are their parent - surely if you wanted them to know how to cook you would have taught them before now?

Kids react to how parents parent. If your kids are not grateful then is that because you do everything for them?

How about spend the time teaching them how to cook and making sure they are contributing to the household by doing chores and stuff.

Go. It does children good to see their parents throw occasional hissy fits, and parents good to throw them.

I have fantasies of fucking off to live somewhere else sometimes