to be shoched that dd 15 is reading 50 shades!

[HoraceCope]

and i think dd 17 has also read it the comments she was making. i know i have been on threads here where people have tried to ban their dd d=reading this and i agreed with the majority that banning is not sensible. i wouldnt read it myself

YABU to be shocked, the book is everywhere and it's very fashionable to be seen reading it (it's one of those 'books for people who don't do books, innit').

YWBU not to point out to them that it's a terribly-written Twilight fanfiction... and considering Twilight itself was fairly badly written, 50SoG should be read only as an example of how not to write a novel. Great for making a quick million, not great for having any integrity or respectability as a writer.

I read Lace at 15. Bit of an eye-opener but no permanent damage done!

How on earth can you ban a 15 or 17yo from reading whatever they like?

Given the general prevalence of porn these days, I suspect 50 shades is a preferable outcome!

Seriously: I was reading Lace, Valley of the Dolls and all sorts of inappropriate Harold Robbins novels from about 13/14...whilst not a brilliant education, I don't think they were especially damaging. Meanwhile, my DM banned Judy Blume's 'Forever' when I was around 12 or 13, so the only book that might have been vaguely appropriate (dealing with actual teenagers doing actual stuff and that talked about real emotions) was the only one I never got to finish.

I read worse at that age. I was very curious about sex and read all manner of things; it's natural at that age, and better to read about it than getting practical experience.

I would sit them down and talk about the elements of the relationship depicted in the book, and have a discussion about manipulation, one-sidedness and controlling behaviour. Encourage them to be critical rather than romanticising the relationship, so they can be mindful in their future relationships.

Just read the rest of the thread...oh god, yes: Flowers in the Attic (underage sex, incest and, iirc, bestiality, along with a good helping of murder and weirdness), Jackie Collins and loads of really inappropriate horror (loved James Herbert, Stephen King et al) from a very young age.

And my mother banned Judy Blume.

Suspect it was the only one she'd heard of...

When I think back to what I read between 13 and 17 , Jilly Copper - animal cruelty, violence towards women, bed hopping, multiple partners, unrequited love - Jackie Collins - Sex, drugs and rock n roll, and Virginia Andrews -insest (sorry spelling is lousy!) and child cruelty. I learnt a lot not least what constitutes a decent read, and the fact that is is made up and not real You could state that my generations RC-B is this generations CG - and despite being a total bas*d I take RCB over CG any day of the week! - But what do I know I learned everything I know about Polo from JC!!

Did any one ever read a book by a guy called Jan Cremer?

I was another one reading Stephen King at 11...finally got to Gerald's Game a year or so later, at which point my DM finally took an interest in what I was reading. That one caused a raised eyebrow and the comment 'should you be reading this..?' when she looked at the blurb She didn't try to stop me though...

Oh I read soft porn type books, gory murder stories, everything even as a young teen. I'm not a highly sexed psychopath now. Well...

It's just fiction.

Hah, I remember sneaking a copy of Forever by Judy Blume in from the library. And to this very day I cannot hear the name Ralph without thinking of the male protagonist's penis!!

Dd1 (15)tells me that tumbler is up in arms against 50SOG as it treats women v badly. 'Even worse than Twilight'

Oh and I devoured Flowers in the Attic and its sequels. Anything by Virginia Andrews really, although after she died and the ghostwriter took over it all got a bit repetitive. I actually preferred her Heaven series to Flowers but the woman sure was obsessed with incest.

Christ, I think I'd rather my 15 year old dd (not that I have one, mine are still 'ickle so it's all hypothetical yet) read 50sog than some of these books mentioned here (I've read a few, and had a quick google of the synopsis of the ones I haven't) at least it's not rape, bestiality, incest or rank batcrap craziness (Marquis de Sade, I'm looking at you)

If it makes you feel sick it's not a pleasant read. And aren't fiction books for entertainment mostly? Id rather read something light and pleasant, there's too much cruelty and sadness in the world to "entertain yourself" by reading more, that's been made up.

dd wants to find out for herself she said when i asked her. i did say the woman is treated badly but I havent read it.

my dm got me reading The L Shaped room which has actual sex and love in it, you dont read about sex just the fact she loves and misses him after the event

Oh god! It's not abusive it's consensual. It happens daily across the world and those who participate enjoy it, that's why they do it!! However it is very badly written I will agree on that

Windmeup; it absolutely is abusive and manipulative. Nothing to do with the BDSM element (although it's fair to say she missed the point entirely and replaced it with badly researched titillation) but the relationship is heavily skewed with very little concern for Ana's wellbeing,

As long as they read, that's fine by me. Anything is better than nothing!

One of my dc started the marquis de Sade's 101 days of sodom. Did eventually get bored with it and has never read 50SoG. A banned book is much more interesting than one that is not, certainly for teenagers

Judy Blume.. Well that name takes me right back to my preteen years. Loved those books. I don't remember my parents ever objecting to the mountain of Jackie Collins books I ploughed through in my early teens. As they weren't to my mum's taste I suspect she had no idea what was inside

Never heard of Lace, have I missed out?.. Off to see if I can download it to kindle!

yabu, I read LACE whern I was 12

Ooh you are in for a treat iloveham might read lace again my self! Which one of you bitches is my mother!

Wheatley

Urgh - even aged 12 I found the racism (and misogyny) in most of his books distasteful to say the least. Although the world is waiting for a decent remake of The Devil Rides Out.

Horace, perhaps if you're worried about 50 Shades you could treat it as an opportunity to open a discussion on relationships and consensual sex? There are a fair few blogs and threads on here that have some good arguments against the book and film too.

16yo (usually to be found on TUMBLR or AO3 ) was very scathing about 50 shades. Said it was rubbish writing with 2D characters and a crap representation of BDSM.

It's not the kinky sex that would bother me, it would be the totally skewed view of what is a 'normal' relationship . Controlling, emotionaly abusive . Might be a good chance to open up a discussion with both your DDs. Though you'd have to read it yourself-a fate I wouldn't wish on anyone . Its really bady written .