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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to go away for 4/5 nights without children?

45 replies

Holidayornot · 22/02/2015 16:45

I really want to go to New York and have been saving and planning it for next Winter when I turn 40.
It'd be hard work with two kids (2 and 4) and I don't want to bring them. My husband thinks it's not fair to go away for so long and leave them.
They'd be with both sets of grandparents, well looked after, no concerns there.
He just thinks that it would be an eternity for them. Longest we've ever left them is a night. If we don't go on our own we'll shelve it for another time.
So what do you think?

OP posts:

Batmansunderpants · 22/02/2015 17:32

They will be fine. I'm leaving all of mine and going to LA in June. They will have a holiday with your mum.

nannycaro · 22/02/2015 17:32

YANBU- I looked after my nephews (aged 3 +11months) for 5 nights whilst my brother and his wife went to NY for his 40th. The boys had a great 'holiday' with their (favourite!) aunt and my brother and SIL had a brilliant time

Nunyabiz · 22/02/2015 17:33

Absolutely go. My husband has booked vegas for his 40th and lumped the kids with me...for a week. I would go with him in a heart beat, and yes i would miss the little ones but... Fuck i had an hour to myself this afternoon and it was heaven. A whole week of peeing alone?!?! GOOOOOO!

Philoslothy · 22/02/2015 17:40

Your relationship with your husband is as important as that with your children. DH and I go away for the weekend about six times a year on our own and have a proper holiday in our own every year. This is one of the reasons that we have such a solid marriage

Original poster

Holidayornot · 22/02/2015 17:41

Ok. That makes me feel a bit easier! Almost 100% approval rate.
I'll go back to husband and see if he changes his mind.

OP posts:

ChrisMooseAlbanians · 22/02/2015 17:49

If husband doesn't want to go, take a friend instead

Seriously, YANBU. If the GP'S are willing, I would!

TSSDNCOP · 22/02/2015 18:06

I would and have. The time with GP with no parents at all is so precious. The DC would rather be with DM than me any day.

laughingmyarseoff · 22/02/2015 20:07

YANBU, it's good for them to spend sometime with the grandparents and good for you to enjoy that without the kids.

Dazedconfused · 22/02/2015 20:18

Go!!!! We are already planning our 5th anniversary (I know not a big deal) trip to New York in 2 years when our pfb will be 3(she's 5 months) and will be left with her doting grandparents and we will maybe get to work on a sibling (sorry tmi) .

321zerobaby · 22/02/2015 20:23

They will be fine. I went away for 6 days for my 40th, my dc were 1 and 4. My dh looked after them, planned trips to see GPs and aunties, the children were concerned I was missing all the fun!
Have a great trip.

Stinkersmum · 22/02/2015 20:29

Go!!! My sister and her now ex went on holiday for two weeks to the Dom rep. I had all 4 of her DCs for a week (then aged 10, 8, 6 & 2), then our mother took them on holiday for a week. Everyone had a great time.

Stormingateacup · 22/02/2015 20:55

I wouldn't, sorry! Too long for the little one IMO, he/she won't understand that you're coming back.

I also think it'd be a bit unfair to cajole your husband into it if he doesn't really want to.

MsVestibule · 22/02/2015 21:05

We went to Las Vegas for 10 nights when our DCs were 3.1 and 17 months. They were looked after very well by their grandparents and I'm not aware of any short or long term damage apart from to my liver. I was a SAHM so they were used to me being with them 24/7.

I suppose the difference is that we were both happy to leave them. DH and I love child free breaks (we normally go away once a year for 3 or 4 nights) and it rejuvenates our marriage.

getawaynow · 22/02/2015 21:11

Go! I am a nanny and have looked after lots of children of similar ages for 3 - 7 nights in a row. Parents need relationship time as well as child time. Have a great time!

Patsyandeddie · 22/02/2015 21:23

Go girl, they'll be fine!

AmysTiara · 22/02/2015 21:29

Go and have a great time. I love new York I'm jealous

MaudeLebowski · 22/02/2015 21:48

$ nights is not a long time. They'll have a belting time with their grandparents.

Cornonthecob · 22/02/2015 21:56

Omg go! If only if we had your kind of support system! Enjoy.....

tilliebob · 22/02/2015 21:57

I planned to go to NYC like you op for my 40th. However smallest dc was only 2 and I just knew the minute I got on the plane he'd come down with chicken pox/a raging ear infection or whatever. I've kept all the dollars I got as pressies and we're planning to go for our 25th wedding anniversary instead. Youngest dc will be almost 10 by then and the other dcs early 20's/late teens.

wigglesrock · 22/02/2015 21:57

Yes, I would and have. I left my two kids ( one of which was younger than yours) to go to New York for five days and every year we go to Paris for a few nights and leave our three kids now with my parents. They see my parents a few times a week any way, they're well used to them, their house, their routines. Tbh I don't give it a second thought.

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