Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to only buy cheap presents for dn and dn

25 replies

pigglewiggle · 21/02/2015 17:30

I've in the past spent a lot on things like expensive Lego sets, but they just don't take care of them. they have a lot of fun but just loose all the bits and smash them about.

Am I being too precious about hits? A 80 quid Lego set is now just all loose in toy boxes without any instructions and I'm pretty offended. I know I used to treasure gifts I was given and I'm probably being u expecting them to take care of things like I would. They are 9 and 7.

OP posts:
MrsTawdry · 21/02/2015 17:37

About lego. There are two schools of thought. SOME people make the DC build them and then won't let them take the sets apart again...others...let them build them and then take them apart and reserve them to be built again.

OTHERS do as your DN and DN do...my DDs do that too. It all goes in a big box with other bits of lego.

YABU to judge.

KingJoffreyObviouslyWatchesHol · 21/02/2015 17:39

DS's Lego is chaos.

Meh. He's happy.

ImperialBlether · 21/02/2015 17:50

Perhaps they'd rather have something else? I'd just get them a gift voucher so you can't be upset at them wrecking a gift you've bought for them.

BackforGood · 21/02/2015 17:50

I agree with the others - I think lego - like all toys - is there to be played with. I feel sorry for dc who have to count each piece back in on a check list and are only allowed to use each piece for the original model in the designed way.

that said, I think £80 is a HUGE amount to spend on a present, unless you are totally loaded.

Quitelikely · 21/02/2015 17:55

Why not spend £80 on some clothes for them?

I don't really see what it's got to do with you regarding the Lego.

Surely DN looks after her things. Or does she smash her dolly up?

This isn't the 1920s where people only had one toy and guarded it with their life. Kids get lots of toys these days and just don't always appreciate them. I could understand if you were saying you weren't buying any toys but you seem to be talking about money rather than the toy.

I think it's the money bothering you.

Charlotte3333 · 21/02/2015 17:58

ES has a couple of Lego sets which are in pristine condition on his top shelf, I think one is a Millennium Falcon and the other is an AT-AT. YS is forbidden from even looking at these, but all other Lego in this house is in buckets, boxes, handbags, shoes, the dogs bed, under sofas, on windowsills, everywhere.

I'd be a little upset to have people buy them gifts then judge that the gifts were played with. Children shouldn't really be forced to keep stuff pristine to please an adult and it's not a gift if it comes with attached regulations. Plus, the stuff they create without the instructions is usually far more imaginative and exciting than the original lego set.

grannytomine · 21/02/2015 18:04

Once you have given the gift it is theirs to do with as they will, if I am not happy for that then I won't give it so I think yes YABU.

MrsTawdry · 21/02/2015 18:06

Charlotte what is "ES" please? I've seen it on here a couple of times and can't work it out.

WineListPlease · 21/02/2015 18:24

Toys are there to be played with, they are not ornaments.
DH still resents his mum for not letting him play the way he wanted to, with his toy cars. She wanted to keep them pristine and in their boxes because they would be worth something one day.

My DS got so much pleasure and benefit from creatively playing with his lego sets and desinging new models - that's how lego was supposed to be in the first place!

corgiology · 21/02/2015 18:30

ES = Eldest son
YS = Youngest son

I think

TwoOddSocks · 21/02/2015 18:31

The whole point of lego is to build your own creations surely? You build the assigned thing once then the blocks go in the general box and you build other stuff and use your imagination? In the future I'd suggest that you spend an amount of money that will leave you without any expectations about how it's used. I'm always grateful for gifts but I absolutely hate getting things from people (particularly clothes for my 2 year old DS from MIL) which are expected to be kept in pristine condition with tabs kept on them, it feels like a burden.

SleeplessSeattle · 21/02/2015 18:43

MrsTawdry is it not elder son and younger son? I can't think what else it would mean

PtolemysNeedle · 21/02/2015 18:56

Lego is really hard work, and I'm assuming you don't have children that play with Lego yourself if you don't get it.

We have opened many Lego sets over the years, from the ones costing a fiver to the ones that cost £150. They can stay completely together, but the £80 sets you're talking about take up a lt of room when fully made up, take ages of child concentration to build, have many tiny little pieces, and are too delicate to stay completely together when they're being played with.

They are brilliant fun to build and then play with, really really good, but they don't stay together. The bits become parts of other sets, or they go in the box to be used in whatever creative way the child decides. That's the whole point.

You say the children aren't looking after it, but the pieces are solid, they aren't being damaged by being in the Lego box. They are probably playing with the Lego in a much better way than they could if they just built it and let it sit there whole gathering dust. Would that fit better with your idea of looking after it?

Barefootgirl · 21/02/2015 20:08

If they really like Lego, why not just buy them the generic sets of bricks, rather than the pre-designed 'things'? That way it doesn't matter if the bits get mixed up with all their other Lego.

There are plenty of other construction-type toys that you could buy for a 7 & 9 year old. My friends bought my DD an electronics set when she was 8 or 9, she loved it.

WineListPlease · 21/02/2015 21:11

The sets have special pieces that the generic boxes don't have.

Charlotte3333 · 21/02/2015 21:19

I know it's really, really wrong to admit to it but after we watched the Lego movie for the first time I thought to myself "I would LOVE to be able to superglue the sets together and never hear them moaning about it getting broken". I'm becoming Evil Lord Business with every Lego man I find in my pant drawer.

squoosh · 21/02/2015 21:21

There are two types of people in this world. Those who keep the packaging and instructions and those who don't. I don't, it doesn't mean I appreciate things less.

£80 is a lot of money to spend on a niece/nephew so you wouldn't be unreasonable to cut that down. But as long as they express genuine thanks for the gift you are being unreasonable to monitor for months afterwards exactly how the toy is being played with.

squoosh · 21/02/2015 21:22

I assumed all Lego went in one big Lego box. Sounds tedious and not a whole lot of fun to have to keep various sets separate.

GoldfishCrackers · 21/02/2015 21:22

Are you Lord Business? Wink

Pyjamaramadrama · 21/02/2015 21:24

Yanbu to by cheap presents for kids but yabu to judge about the Lego. Have you seen the Lego movie?

I used to try to keep ds toys pristine but they're there to be played with.

I've given up trying to keep the Lego separate with the instructions. Ds builds it once then it goes into the big tub. He makes some fabulous creations with the jumbled Lego all from his own imagination.

£80 is a lot to spend on a toy though so buy all means buy cheaper.

fannyfanakapan · 21/02/2015 21:29

Im in the "lego is there to build imaginative things with, not just build it once and never play with it again" camp. I find it really sad that a child cant build a gun/spaceship/car/aeroplane with a mishmassh of lego parts from a variety of sets. My DS has spent many happy hours playing with lego - just building random stuff.

As a compromise, maybe consider buy them something for £20 and put £60 in a savings account for them for when they turn 18. My aunt did this for my DD - on her 18th birthday, she opened a card with a cheque for a substantial sum of money and her reaction was priceless.

SaucyJack · 21/02/2015 21:35

"Surely DN looks after her things. Or does she smash her dolly up?

This isn't the 1920s where people only had one toy and guarded it with their life."

It's not the 1950s either schnookums.

Why would the niece be inherently any tidier than the nephew?

And not all girls have dolls either.

As for the OP....... buy something cheaper that you don't mind the kids playing with in their own way. I can appreciate £80 is a lot just to get chucked all over the floor.

VioletMoon4683 · 21/02/2015 21:41

If you have a child who is unlikely to keep sets together, don't buy them extremely dismantleable sets. Buy them creative sets like play mobil, sulvanian families or a one solid piece of equipment like a mini trampoline or a kids camera.

Original poster
pigglewiggle · 21/02/2015 22:33

Well Im not trying to stomp out creatively, but the set had 5 different parts to it, spent ages helping them make the first one, only for them to throw it on a sodden floor and smash to bits. They ripped the instruction booklet by being rough also.

I expected at least to get the whole set assembled before its smashed up and put back in the box. Its just not taking care of things that annoys me, they are totally spoilt.

I haven't seen the Lego movie. Apparently I'm like the baddie as I wanted to super glue the parts.

OP posts:
MrsTawdry · 22/02/2015 01:16

It sounds like they don't really enjoy lego anyway OP. Just buy them something else.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page