to be a bit miffed at my DD's friend leaving without a thank you this morning?

[madmother1]

My teenage daughter had a friend over to stay last night. She just up and left this morning without even popping her head around the door to say "Thanks for having me". I only knew she'd gone as I heard my front door click shut.
I mentioned to my daughter that I hope she always said thank you to people that she has sleepovers with. She said she did. AIBU to think this is rude?

I did this in my very late teens/(possibly early twenties even!)-it was honestly the height of my 'teenage awkwardness' even though I possibly wasn't even a teen.I was a generally very polite person but sometimes became ridiculously shy in the oddest of situations and I know it came across as rudeness,I still look back and cringe over it.I quickly made myself buck up after that as felt so bad afterwards!

A little bit rude I suppose but I wouldn't really give it more than two seconds thought. There are tons of reasons she could've slipped off - text from parents saying get home asap, shyness, forgetfulness. Who cares really?

At least she didn't leave vomit in the spare bed when she disappeared (unlike a teenage girl who stayed here....)

did she know you were up? were you in your bedroom or another room in the house? for me this is key.

if you were in your bedroom then and she needed to get home for work or whatever then she wasn't being rude just respectful of your house. if you were in another room she may not have known you were up and have not wanted to disturb you. again not rude.

if however she knew you were up and we're visible then yes she was rude

I think it depends if the door in question was opened or closed.
If it was closed it is quite understandable and maybe she will leave the thanking until next time she sees you.

We hosted an exchange student for 8 weeks - she never said thank you. Not for tickets to concerts, taking her to special events, food, drink, bed...nothing. Just rude. I did notice that DD became overly polite during that time 'Thank you Mum, it's really kind of you to get us tickets to this, I know it wasn't easy' etc. etc.

I wonder if as DoJo says, she just didn't want to disturb you.

To be honest I think British people can lard on the insincere thank yous as a box ticking exercise rather than genuine gratitudes.

I say thank you about 4 times when paying for my shopping. Why? WHY???

When I was a teenager I never would have dreamed of disturbing my friends' parents when I was leaving! I'd thank my friend, maybe say "say thanks to your mum for me" but go into their living room or wherever uninvited? No way would I have had the confidence for that.

Agree with the poster who said your daughter was rude if she didn't see her friend to the door though.