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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To consider my relationship because of OTT, drama-queen behaviour?

32 replies

mybabymybabymine · 16/02/2015 11:57

DP is such a drama queen.

Sometimes he has to work nights. This is just something he has to do in his chosen profession. But honestly the DRAMA every time he is on nights.

He emerges around 4 and ROARS out a yawn that seems to last forever. Then I have at least an hour of him making cups of tea and coffee and declaring how tired he is. At ten second intervals, seriously. When he comes in from working nights and from days for that matter you'd be forgiven for thinking he had spent a week down the mines.

He just rang me about wanting to do something but the way he was going about it - muttering, talking very fast,repeatedly saying my name: I felt like I was being questioned in a police cell.

He is also permanently convinced he is ill. He goes to his GP twice/three times a week. He has a bigger medical file than has ever been seen before and munchausens (sp?) has been brought up as a possibility.

He had a row with his friends two months ago and he still keeps roaring about it.

I'm exhausted and fed up. I never get asked how I am. There's no room for me.

OP posts:
mybabymybabymine · 16/02/2015 14:33

I'm not totally sure sorry.

OP posts:
Joyfulldeathsquad · 16/02/2015 15:28

Sounds tough. Flowers

Honest and frank chat time? I couldn't spend my life with someone I resented, it would eat away at me till I hated them and that's not fair on the kids, you and him.

I would set a time frame in my head and after the talk if nothing had changed I'd go.

He does sound extremely emotionally draining.

frumpet · 16/02/2015 15:55

How long ago did the Fitness to practise thing start ? That in itself must be immensely stressful for him to deal with , did his obsession with his physical health become significantly worse after that happened ?

he is a difficult patient and I think it's not entirely coincidental that he is discharged from hospital almost as soon as he's admitted!

To my mind that statement says less about him being difficult and more that they were unable to find anything wrong with him at that time. How often is he admitted to hospital ?

frumpet · 16/02/2015 16:27

Can you cope on just your wage ?

littleleftie · 16/02/2015 17:06

It doesn't sound to me as if you and the DC are getting any benefit at all from you staying in this "relationship" and in fact you sound aboslutely drained by it.

I mean this question seriously, for you to think about, why are you still there? If it is just due to pity, then you know that is no way to live your life.

frumpet · 16/02/2015 17:22

People come to the end of relationships for far less than this OP , if you cannot see any way forward or any improvement in the future , it must be incredibly difficult to cope with his behaviour .

Have to say though night shifts absolutely destroy me , I could cope when I did them permanently , but when they are combined with days as well , I really suffer .

Summerisle1 · 16/02/2015 17:58

He must be very difficult to live with, OP and you seem to have considerable stamina to put up with him! As a pp has said, people have ended relationships for far less and I think it is time to put yourself first for a change and consider your future carefully. He'll drag you down at this rate.

Incidentally, I had an ex-partner who, as my grandmother would have said "Thoroughly enjoyed ill health" and certainly, he used his ailments as a handy way to disengage from things.He was also prone to bizarre accidents that nobody ever really saw happening in detail but which routinely landed him in A & E or briefly on an observation ward. The very predictability of these incidents was very draining.

I hope your dp has some redeeming qualities, OP, but I'm struggling to see them from what you've posted.

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