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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask about needles/injections

35 replies

ghostspirit · 14/02/2015 21:27

my 12 year old son is really scared of needles.... do boys need to have needles/injections often or is that more a female thing. he gets really stressed if we so much as talk about a needle. i did think when i next have to have a needle should i take him with me so he can see its really not that bad. or do i just leave it... does it even matter should i just leave him.

OP posts:
CupidStuntSurvivor · 14/02/2015 21:29

Why would needles be more a female thing??

PourquoiTuGachesTaVie · 14/02/2015 21:29

Males may occasionally need blood tests, booster vaccines (tetanus for example) or an IV drip perhaps, just like females. I don't see why women would necessarily need more needles than men though?

Onsera3 · 14/02/2015 21:31

I guess because OP is thinking just teen girls might get the HPV vaccine.

Electriclaundryland · 14/02/2015 21:32

I find Emla cream helps. DS has blood tests every fortnight and can't really feel the needles. He's 7 and a total trooper about it.

If your ds has a real phobia I don't know if it will stop the fear though.

UncleT · 14/02/2015 21:34

What a truly bizarre question. Boys have vaccinations too, as they do dental treatment, blood tests and basically everything else one would expect. Hmm

EdSheeran · 14/02/2015 21:36

What UncleT said.

Original poster
ghostspirit · 14/02/2015 21:39

well i was thinking of adult woman as well when they have injections/blood tests when pregnant. or for birth control. i just (thought) woman had them more than men... sorry .....

OP posts:
Waffles80 · 14/02/2015 21:40

I think you need to get him some help to deal with the phobia, TBH.

Original poster
ghostspirit · 14/02/2015 21:41

yeah im not even sure if im just making a thing of it. its not like hes in a situation of having regular injections or anything. so maybe i should not worry about it

OP posts:
Zanzibaragain · 14/02/2015 22:05

Sorry if this is repeated but lost my original post.

Anyway I think you sound like a great mum who has spotted a problem that needs tackling head on.

My dh is needle phobic.

Not just a little bit, but full on can't talk about, look at , or even think about needles without reacting very badly, flat out faint, panic attack, massively stressed.
It has been life changing for him, it affects all the choices he makes about his health, his dental health even where to go on holiday.

I work in the medical profession, I handle needles all the time and before I lived with a needle phobic I had very, very little patience, very little understanding how out of control it is.

This is not a men are all wuss, women are tough problem, it is a condition that can so easily be pushed to one side but as the years go by it will affect his health and the decisons he makes.

Go talk to your GP, see if there is any therapy that can help. Dh has had cognitive behavorial, hypno therapy, the lot. We finally found a dentist that got that he isn't frightened of drills or pain and will have fillings with no pain relief, but it has dramatically affected his dental health.
It has limited his travel options, even changed his career options, it has limited his life choices.

Do not sweep this to one side , it doesn't get better if ignored, but it is easy to ignore the issue and just not face situations where needles are needeD.

Well done for spotting that it's growing as an issue and that it will affect your ds.

Original poster
ghostspirit · 14/02/2015 22:20

i never thought of it that way. defo no harm in giving gp a call.

OP posts:
Zanzibaragain · 14/02/2015 22:27

Here is one of many examples how needle phobia has affected us as a family.
Dh and dd aged 7, watching TV .
Dh sees needle use on TV, stands up, passes out, crashes to floor breaking side table and lamp.
I return only 10 minutes later, hysterical daughter , badly traumatised thinks her father is dying.
Dh comes to, feels physically sick, feels like he has failed as a father.
Not a great day.

It really does affect his life and our lives.

Original poster
ghostspirit · 14/02/2015 23:51

oh dear that is bad i never knew it could get to that. :( he still remembers hes pre school jab at 3.5 so he thinks they hurt when they actually dont. its only because he tensed all his muscles so it was like putting a needle in a rock. but he does not understand if you relax it will go in softly and with ease. but then i guess if he does have a phobea there is not a logic understanding.

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 15/02/2015 00:01

Sorry but needles do hurt, I have tried relaxing but it doesn't make a difference. I think it is just more painful for some people than others. I found the stitches after giving birth worse than the birth itself.

I think it's just the booster jabs which happen at about 14 that he'll have to have. It might be that teen bravado kicks in by then? But if he's really worried and he'd prefer to, you could take him to have them done at the GP rather than at school.

There are alternatives being developed - a super fine needle which goes through the holes already present in skin which won't be able to be felt, and a capsule type thing which can be swallowed. Neither will be rolled out for school injections in the next 2 years, though, but might reassure him for the future.

I can just about cope with blood tests/cannulas but any IM injection I am petrified of and will go out of my way, risk my own health to avoid. I know it makes no sense :( Will follow for advice anyway because I think DS might be the same when he is older, he's terrified of doctors after a nasty experience at his pre school jabs. Slowly getting over that one, but suspect it will all be undone if he does need a jab at some point.

UncleT · 15/02/2015 00:07

Yes - needles do hurt. I'm terrible with pain but have just had to learn to deal with needles (and fortunately don't have a specific phobia of them).

Needle phobia certainly can be serious - I know someone who is seriously phobic and it's no picnic at times. I simply don't see any relevance to gender is all.

Original poster
ghostspirit · 15/02/2015 00:10

i just know needles dont hurt me. can only talk for myself really. But yeah with any teen type injections i think i will defo take him to the gp. i dont think it would be fair to make him get it done at school.

OP posts:
sallysparrow157 · 15/02/2015 00:11

Needles do hurt. Cannulas hurt, taking blood hurts, having a vaccination hurts. There's no point pretending to kids otherwise. Emla cream helps for cannulas and blood taking for kids with good veins as it numbs the skin but not under the skin, it won't help much for an injection as the pain from that comes from it being injected into the muscle.
All these things hurt but they don't hurt that much. When I'm explaining it to kids I ask if they've been scratched by a cat, I tell them it is less sore than that. Even without local anaesthetic cream, with good distraction (anything from where's wally to chatting to someone on the phone!) it isn't that bad! (To the extent of 'so when are you going to put the needle in?' 'Erm, 30 seconds ago...')
If he needs to have any form of injection or blood test, ask your gp if they can speak to your local paeds ward, they will have play specialists who are amazing at talking kids through procedures.

Andro · 15/02/2015 00:14

Definitely get him some help. I have a dd who had a bad experience with pre school vaccinations and its causing no end of issues (she ended up in ICU) - at this point we are probably going to have to change gp because she can't even get past the front door without a full blown panic attack.

TheCatsFlaps · 15/02/2015 01:12

He really does need help to get past this - he is still at an age when something meaningful can be done to address the problem. There's a whole host of things that might require needles: vaccinations, boosters, dental treatment, diabetes, blood tests etc.

I don't like the sensation, but sometimes you have to get off the pot or start pissing. If I go for a blood est, nurses love me: I can bring up a vein, tie it off and even get a winged infusion set in on my own. But I still wince and curse the moment. That's all it is, though - a moment. Let him see you get a simple blood test if you have a good practice nurse, and he'll see there's nothing to worry about.

BertieBotts · 15/02/2015 01:49

I honestly find it a lot worse than a cat scratch. I was in hospital a few years ago and didn't know they had started the policy of giving all patients anti DVT injections - into the stomach. I had absolutely no warning of it and the nurse was lovely and obviously felt awful, was being as gentle as she could but it made me cry a lot, and I didn't sleep for the whole night worrying about having to have it again the next day. Luckily they agreed I didn't really need it as I was young, no other risk factors and I could move around. But the place felt bruised for over a week and for the next few months whenever I had my period I had pain in that spot. It's probably psychosomatic, because I know an injection shouldn't cause that much pain but they terrify me because of that.

I guess I probably should look into some kind of therapy. DH was talking a couple of years ago about going to Egypt and my reaction shocked me. I mean if it was totally up to me, then I'd just never visit any countries you need vaccinations for. Doesn't bother me, there's lots to see everywhere else. But the way he reacted to me saying no way I am not going made me realise that it's not really an adult solution to just avoid the situation forever.

Original poster
ghostspirit · 15/02/2015 12:01

catflaps thats what i wondered if he see me having it done he might see its not so bad after all. the last he knows of an injection is his preschool jabs. so hes last memory is not good. so it might be good if he can see a calm situation. its strange how it seems to really hurt some people but not others.

OP posts:
TheFecklessFairy · 15/02/2015 12:29

zanzibaragain - if it is now affecting your DC, has it not occurred to your DH to do something about it?

Kundry · 15/02/2015 12:30

Needles do hurt and are part of modern healthcare. He will occasionally need them as an adult, more if he ever gets unwell. Adults really don't get given Emla cream.

Does he just not like them, expresed with a bit of teen drama, or is he going for full on phobia? If the later, it's worth dealing with now.

TheFecklessFairy · 15/02/2015 12:30

Needles do hurt. NO, they don't!! I had blood taken last Thursday and didn't even feel the needle go in.

BertieBotts · 15/02/2015 13:03

They don't for you maybe Hmm everyone is not the same.