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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Are nappies at 7 years old unreasonable?

77 replies

benetint · 14/02/2015 17:44

Dd is five years old (and five months). She has been dry during the day since she was two years and nine months. However she is still in nappies at night. I mentioned it to the health visitor when DD was 4 and they said nappies at night weren't an issue till children were seven. So we left it a bit longer, hoping she would develop the biological control naturally. Every night though dd fills her nappy (just urine) and the nights we have tried to go without she has wet the bed repeatedly. Dd isn't embarrassed at all about wearing nappies and we haven't really said anything to her about it as we don't want her to be upset or create an issue. Do you think we should wait till she is seven and try again? Any help or advice would be really appreciated. thanks do much

OP posts:

hijk · 14/02/2015 19:18

winewinewine, well for this child, apparently it would have been. it is being controlled with drugs, but no prospect of a cure, ever.

Nerf · 14/02/2015 19:20

I am really surprised to hear that hjjk having been regularly in contact with gps and paeds for my son, both physically and developmentally. Do you think it's a specific medical condition rather than the more usual hormone related issue? As PPS have said, treatment isn't considered until seven and the only medicine I'm aware of related to bedwetting just suppresses urine production at night.

YouKnowNothinJonSnow · 14/02/2015 19:22

My dd1 was in Dry-Nites until she was 10.5. I did take her to the GP several times but it wasn't until she was 10 that they eventually prescribed Desmopressin. She was on them for 3 months, and they've worked. She's now almost 12. I still use the Pampers bed mats on the mattress as she will have the occasional accident but not very often.

I used to get really stressed about dd still being in nappies at night but she wasn't bothered at all. If she's happy and the nappies are convenient (and saving the mattress) then I'd keep her in them. Every now and then maybe try her without for a night and see how she does?

I do think it's quite common for children to still wet the bed at 5. Although all children are different, dd2 was dry at night from 2.5 and has never wet the bed. From my experience I don't think your doctor will do anything yet.

AnneElliott · 14/02/2015 19:28

No. Not unreasonable. DS is 8.5 and is only just dry since Xmas. We just waited it out until he did it by himself.

I8toys · 14/02/2015 19:30

Every child is different. DS1 4 and DS2 8. I've had my son's friends over for sleepover at 9 and they are still in pullups. No problem and no judgement - it won't be forever.

hijk · 14/02/2015 19:33

Yes, nerf, I am sure it is a specific medical condition rather than something hormonal. I don't know what it is though, or maybe I was told and have forgotten. He is dry during the day, and cannot ever be dry at night, unless he takes medication, which he will do for the rest of his life. Like I said, he is 15 now.

ImperialBlether · 14/02/2015 19:34

My son had a problem until he was nearly 7. The doctor said it was a hormonal thing (no idea which hormone, sorry) and gave him something to sniff each night. From the first sniff he was cured. He took it for the month or however long it took to empty the bottle and never had the problem again.

We used to call it the miracle sniffy stuff - I would've paid a fortune for it!

YeahDamon · 14/02/2015 19:36

Dd was seven or eight, I can't remember. Desmopressin was a game changer, she was dry after the second tablet and came off them after three months. Never had a wet night since.

Nerf · 14/02/2015 19:40

It really worries me hjjk. Ds is 13 now, and still wet at night. I might ask them to look wider next time.

hijk · 14/02/2015 19:48

Is he wet EVERY night? DS's friend is wet every night without fail.( without the medication)

Rowgtfc72 · 14/02/2015 19:56

Dd was still in nappies just before her fifth birthday. She's a tall kid and pyjama pants didn't seem to fit properly so we stuck with tesco size six nappies,we would do them up and let her step into them like pants.
We had a couple of theories. She was a very deep sleeper,actually slept through an earthquake and she hardly ever drank liquids so her bladder never learnt to hold enough.
One day we had a dry day,then another,then another. She just grew out of it.

Mintyy · 14/02/2015 19:58

Children are just different regarding being dry at night. I seriously doubt there is anything at all you can do as a parent to change this.

Lazaretto · 14/02/2015 20:04

This post has reassured me. My ds is 5.5 and in pull ups at night. Still wet every morning. Haven't rushed him as I don't see how he can control it. I've also heard it's a developmental stage.

sticklebrickstickle · 14/02/2015 20:05

Nerf, I wet the bed almost every night until I was sixteen. Was under GP and enuresis clinic; followed all advice and treatments but none made a difference for more than a few days. Then it stopped. No obvious reason why but the incidences became less frequent until it didn't happen unless I was unwell or had been drinking alcohol.

Obviously everybody is different but people can and do outgrow bed-wetting, even in their teens. I think it's unusual for a doctor to say somebody will never be dry at night and sounds indicative of a wider medical problem which is not the case for most bed wetters and hopefully not for your son. My doctor never told me it was hopeless even when I was 15 and had tried every treatment at least once.

Also even if a treatment doesn't work first time it is worth trying again in the future. I have a friend who was also a bedwetter into his teens, bedwetting alarm didn't work when he was a child but then worked for him when he was 14 or 15. Unfortunately sometimes it is just a case of having to wait until the body is ready but that doesn't mean you should give up hope!

BingBong36 · 14/02/2015 20:06

My 6 year old is in nappies and is soaked in the morning.

RingtheBells · 14/02/2015 20:11

DS was dry in the day at 3 and still wearing pull-ups at night until he was about 6 and still had the occasional overnight accident until about 8.

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 14/02/2015 20:19

My dd is 4.10 and is on night 8 of no pull up. (After about 2 months of dry pull ups.)

We didn't worry about it - just waited for her brain to start releasing the right hormone.

It helped that she wasn't bothered. Although she's now very proud of her pull-up-free life.

WineWineWine · 14/02/2015 21:16

Desmopressin reduces urine production overnight so it doesn't actually cure the problem. It does stop wet beds but it doesn't increase bladder capacity or teach the child to wake up when they need to wee.
However, it can be good for an older child (7+) because they stop worrying about wetting the bed, and with a period of dryness, the developmental maturity can fall into place so the problem is apparently cured after a course of treatment.
Oxybutynin is also used to reduce bladder problems.

hijk · 14/02/2015 21:52

I can't remember what my Ds's friend is on, although he has been on it for 8 years, and will be staying on it, but like I said, he was EVERY night, and still is if he doesn't take the medication. If your child is gradually decreasing the number of wet beds, then he isn't the same.

Cobain · 14/02/2015 21:59

The majority of the time it is hormonal and your child either produces the hormone or the don't. No high fives and cheers of how great the child is, they are just creating enough of the hormone to stay dry and there should be no shame for a child that is not.

Mixtape · 14/02/2015 22:02

DS2 is 5 and has been dry at night for about 6 months. DS1 was dry in the day from 3 but at 8.5 is still wet at least once a week - until he was 7, he had never been dry at night. We were referred to the continence nurse when he was 6 - we did the weeing / measuring, tried desmo etc and nothing worked. at DH's insistence we discharged from the clinic, got new mattresses with a waterproof side and 3 sets of waterproof fitted sheets, and took him out of pull ups at night. It took a few weeks but he started having increasing dry nights. My worry now is nights away - he is due to go to Cub camp and is not so reliably dry I can be certain he won't have an accident.

kittentwo · 14/02/2015 22:04

Don't know what to say ds1 dd2 both dry an night 2 and half dd3 dry day an night by 3 dgs dry an night by 3. and tbh honest they didnt take a lot of doing could count on one hand the number of accidents.

Fourarmsv2 · 14/02/2015 22:13

DS1 was offered desmopressin at 5, but chose not to start taking them until about 6 or 7. So was in nappies until then. DS2 waited until 7/8 to start the tablets. DS1 is now naturally dry at nearly 11 (we weaned the dosage down) and DS2 has had a reduced dosage recently.

This was purely for them. I'd have had no problem keeping on with nappies until they wanted to take the meds / because dry.

hoobypickypicky · 14/02/2015 22:15

I'm reading things like 'You could lift him but' etc. Tell me, do parents not lift as a matter of course these days? I just assumed that everyone did once they'd started toilet training their child at around 2- 2.5 years (that's a genuine question btw, it's not intended to sound sarcastic).

kittentwo · 14/02/2015 22:18

I didn't lift just limited liquids after tea. Milk bath book bed. Used to leave potty by bed.

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