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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To give a 3 year a cup of tea in the morning

47 replies

peaches1999 · 08/02/2015 11:11

A friend of mine gives her 3 year old 2 or 3 cups of tea in the morning with her breakfast. She thinks I'm being unreasonable as I don't offer a hot drink. My DC drinks milk or water in the morning. Should I be offering tea?

OP posts:

NobodyLivesHere · 08/02/2015 12:24

Neither I or any of my kids drink tea. We've survived.

wheresthelight · 08/02/2015 12:25

do what suits! my dd often takes sips of my tea or dp's and if we all have a hot chocolate she will also have a Luke warm cup too

Aladyinsane · 08/02/2015 12:26

Thanks for posting this OP. I give my 2yo a cup of tea when she fancies it. (Weak, milky) Never more than two in a day but usually only one or none at all. My mum started it when she was looking after poorly DC. And I kept it up. (Also her favourite book is Peace at Last, in which Mrs Bear gives Mr Bear a cup of tea!). I feel a little bad about it and thought I would be flamed by MN if I ever admitted it. I'm glad that most people agree it's fine.

OhMittens · 08/02/2015 12:28

Also it used to be the fashion to put a slug of brandy in a baby's milk bottle to "help them settle". Only as far back as the 70's.

I don't think anyone would do that any more... would they?

Tea's not exactly dangerous in very small quantities, but it's not necessary, needed or even particularly nice for toddlers. Also, it encourages them to gravitate towards hot drinks or drinks in mugs - not exactly a great idea.

sleepwhenidie · 08/02/2015 12:31

It's not the caffeine in tea that interferes with iron absorption, it's the tannin, so whilst decaf isn't as bad it won't stop that issue.

crje · 08/02/2015 12:31

My dd5 has tea in the morning with me .
If the cup the child is drinking from is child sized I don't see a problem.

BitOutOfPractice · 08/02/2015 12:31

Mine always drank warm milk with breakfast. In fact, aged 15 and 11 they still do now

Smartiepants79 · 08/02/2015 12:33

My children have never had tea. Oldest is 4 and it wouldn't occur to me to give it to them. I don't drink it much myself.
Doesn't it have caffeine in it? I wouldn't give them very much.

LetticeKnollys · 08/02/2015 12:40

I don't/won't with baby DS, I don't see the point in giving babies/toddlers/preschoolers caffeinated drinks, they're buzzed enough on water and milk! Definitely not sugared tea as I want to hold off sweet drinks as long as I can.

Besides, my DSS(7) was always offered tea from baby/toddlerhood and I don't think I've ever seen him have a hot drink without leaving it to go cold and then spilling it, he doesn't do it with other drinks so I think he just accepts the offer because he doesn't want to be left out but isn't actually that bothered about the drink!

sleepwhenidie · 08/02/2015 12:59

ohmittens sums it up I think, it's not a great thing to give to dc's and it's unnecessary, but it's not the worst thing to be giving them. I'd suggest 3 cups with breakfast is excessive though (whoever mentioned that)! Certainly not odd not to offer it

APocketfulOfSpondulix · 08/02/2015 13:10

Tea is a diuretic, doesn't that make it a bit dehydrating?

dementedpixie · 08/02/2015 13:18

neither of mine have had tea or coffee but are a bit partial to hot chocolate

chelsbells · 08/02/2015 13:19

YANBU

I work in a nursery and we have one child who comes in each morning with a bottle of tea hanging out of his mouth - with the tea bagS left in it!! No idea if it has sugar in, not very milky though and always has 2 tea bags left in the bottle - the child is nearly 3 and has done this since I've known him from age of 1!

It drives me mad. She doesn't see a problem with it though - each to their own! Most children would opt for warm milk on a cold morning though!

ChatEnOeuf · 08/02/2015 15:03

My 3yo has a cup of 'milky tea' in the mornings, two at the weekend. Except the 'tea' is just boiling water, so what she's drinking is usually just watered down warm milk . But she loves it. Occasionally I'll dunk the remains of my teabag in her cup but she really just wants the warm drink :) I don't offer juice as she drinks water well, and she's refused it whenever offered in the past.

Charlotte3333 · 08/02/2015 15:10

Neither of my boys will drink hot drinks but the 4yo loves cold coffee. I don't drink it so it's a real treat if he finds the dregs of visitor's cups to slurp once in a while. I've never thought much of it in terms of his health; he has cordial, water or milk the rest of the time so I tend to turn a blind eye.

I did have an expresso in a restaurant recently and he found the cold half I'd left and drank it. Not going to lie, he went a bit mental. So probably best not to give them too much.

Saltedcaramel2014 · 08/02/2015 15:18

The leaflets on nutrition I got from health visitor advised never giving children of this age tea or coffee. I assumed this was to do with caffeine, but it didn't specify. I'm not judging but am saying as it does seem there is an argument against doing it.

squoosh · 08/02/2015 15:30

I'm sure a daily cup of milky tea is fine but a 3 year old having three cups of tea with her breakfast sounds like way too much.

PrettyFeet · 08/02/2015 15:38

When I was little my mum used to give us milky tea with "3" sugars. She also used to dip our dummies in sugar and put butter on burns

I don't see anything wrong with a milky tea though and a "tiny" bit of sugar being added.

DS got milk, he never asked for tea.

HSMMaCM · 08/02/2015 15:43

DD only ever wanted water or a bit of milk. Now she's a teenager, she's added orange juice and hot chocolate. She never has a hot drink in the morning.

ChanceBeAFineThing · 08/02/2015 15:56

My 4yo has no interest in tea, but my nearly 3yo loves to drink my dregs and would probably quite like a cup of tea, though I haven't made him a cup yet.

Caffeine is in chocolate which they both consume too much of so I wouldn't be too worried about giving a toddler a milky tea. Everything in moderation

sanfairyanne · 08/02/2015 20:07

why bother? its only bad for them with no redeeming features. i guess you could give milky redbush tea? we drink that and it is good for you.

kittentwo · 08/02/2015 20:27

mine all had tea with sugar, milky warm. all grown up now, not tooth decay or lacking in iron. surely everyone needs a cup of tea

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