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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To cut back on food to afford to take dd swimming and to soft play?

266 replies

Shortofcash · 08/02/2015 08:30

All our money is allocated each month for bills, there is nothing spare. Dd is age 2 and we have always done free activities like go to the park or surestart activities. All her clothes are hand me downs from my older sisters daughters. I would live to be able to take her to swimming and soft play, I estimate it would cost me about £10 a week. We currently spend £80 a week in a mix of aldi and tesco (mostly aldi - just go to tesco for bits I can't get in aldi). If I shaved £10 a week off our food bill I could afford to take her swimming and soft play (although soon we will have a dd2 so will probably be only be able to afford swimming for both and no soft play :( ) would I be unreasonable to cut back on food so my dd can swim?

OP posts:
Notrevealingmyidentity · 08/02/2015 12:50

Also I would recommend stew with aldi chicken thighs. You get about 6 in a pack so that should make 2 meals for you and the family.

Bulk out with veg and bread to mop up.

Notrevealingmyidentity · 08/02/2015 12:52

And it's £2 a pack.

I think £80 is quite a lot. I spend about £20 for just me and find that more than sufficient.

NancyJones · 08/02/2015 12:53

I am amazed and genuinely in awe at how well some of you seem to shop. Our food bill is shockingly high at about £180pw. We're not struggling financially but I do need to cut back. We are a family of 6 with two preteens who are permanently hungry, a toddler at home and a 10mth old still in nappies and formula. I'm just starting back to work ft and I don't know his you all fit in all the stuff like making own hummous etc??? With 2 of you working f/t?

Oh and YANBU re the swimming but soft play should be maybe a monthly treat? I am astonished however, at his much cleaning products you buy? How often do you clean?

Ineedacleaningfairy · 08/02/2015 12:54

We asked people for money towards yearly membership to different places as birthday/Christmas presents, at our local soft play it's around 100 pounds for a year card which gives you free entry all the time, if you went every week that would work out really cheap, also we have a swimming card where you pay for 10 sessions and get 12 so again saving some money.

Do you have decent wet/cold weather clothing? I'd be more inclined to invest in a proper rain/snow suit and use local parks, you could then reuse the clothing for dc2.

TidyDancer · 08/02/2015 12:58

Gosh yes, £80 a week is a lot of money when budgets are fairly tight. We've been there and if you're careful and sensible I would say you could shave £20-30 off. It takes discipline and planning but it's very doable.

Wrt what other posters are saying about swimming not being essential, I would broadly disagree. It's a life skill and a very important one. I would definitely look at whether there's a local council pool that would allow you to buy a set of swimming sessions (I think mine does 12 for the price of 10) or perhaps a gym membership with a swimming pool attached, although that does depend how much you would use the gym/pool as to whether the money would be worth it.

It might be worth in your circumstances considering whether it would be worth you looking into some part time work rather than having to make these kind of cuts though. Not knocking your choice to be a sahm btw but that's a fairly tight budget if it's going to stay that way long term.

bobbyjoe · 08/02/2015 12:59

Agree with getting rid of the antibac wipes and spray. Same as another poster I only buy washing up liquid, bleach, washing powder and fabric conditioner (I use about a quarter of recommended amount). Washing powder is Tesco's value which is £2.50 for a big box (my major economy saving as the rest of my shopping is organic pretty much - I spend £80 for two adults).

Rice is an area you can change, you buy so much juice which is not good for kids' teeth if drunk every day. I couldn't be bothered doing stuff like making my own hummous as only eat it twice a month. How you make your own bacon and ham like one person posted I've no idea.

That couple on the Greg Wallace programme about saving food were going to Waitrose 17 times a week and spending £350 a week but couldn't see where to cut down. Greg missed a trick with the marinaded chicken - that can be made so simply at home. Anything that has some production process done to it will always be more expensive and disproportionately too as the margin will be hard to determine. It just depends where you're prepared to draw the line. I can't be bothered making my own hummous and don't feel ready made is that expensive or an area for a major saving, marinaded chicken to me would always be a bigger saving for essentially putting it in a container and chucking some oil and spices/herbs on it.

MrsTawdry · 08/02/2015 13:01

It was me bobby and it's fine isn't it? As long as my floors and surfaces are clean (bleach does that) then I'm happy....and as to half mince half lentil as someone suggested, I've ditched the mince and we have lentil bolognaise which we all love.

Meat daily costs a bomb....

5dogsgoswimming · 08/02/2015 13:02

Interesting. Our current budget is 80 which includes 15 for baby activities. So 65 for weekly shop inc nappies. I got a book, a girl called jack which has budget recipes

maddening · 08/02/2015 13:02

Def look out for the £1 toddler mornings at soft play - and it's more fun for little ones as there are no big dc charging around.

Swimming is about £4 as little ones go free so you could get a swim and a couple of toddler morning soft plays for £6.

5dogsgoswimming · 08/02/2015 13:02

I mean look you could have beans on toast say two nights a week

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 08/02/2015 13:06

There's always one isn't there. Beginner. That's none of your business!. What do you suggest poor women who fall pregnant abort their unborn child because they can't afford it!. Be careful what you post because thingscan be taken in a way which may not have been intended. All very well coming out with that old if you can't feed em don't breed em song but the child is here now! so that attitude is useless and beyond d judgmental. Also when OP did get pregnant they might have been in a more financially secure position. You cant just push childten to the side if that security leaves you. Also no matter how poor families are the children don't ask to be born!!
Oh BTW. YNBU. O.P

5dogsgoswimming · 08/02/2015 13:07

Anabel karmel has a great recipe for banana muffins for snacks so you can freeze em and they last ages

fatlazymummy · 08/02/2015 13:16

Totally agree liveinalighthouse. Anyway, the OP can afford to bring up her children. Wearing handmedown clothes is a great idea, and something most people used to do. Budgeting a meal plan and cooking mostly from scratch is a healthy way to live.

Fairylea · 08/02/2015 13:24

Op don't listen to the very few posters questioning your choices about being a sahm or having another child. Sure you could get a part time job and put the kids into nursery but you'll never get this time back with them while they're little. If it's the choice you've made, to budget and manage finances carefully to be a sahm then that's absolutely fine.

I've done both sides of the coin - went back to work when eldest dd was 12 weeks old getting 2 buses there and back to nursery and then work. ... and now ten years later I'm a sahm with a dh earning a very low wage and I didn't enjoy my job so now I am sahm and I love it. Yes we do struggle a little financially but I would rather do that than work. There's nothing wrong with working and nothing wrong with being a sahm. Everyone is different. It's not always about how much you have in savings or whether you can afford to go somewhere exciting every week.

Mrsbird311 · 08/02/2015 13:25

I think you should go for saving £15 a week off your food bill, should be doable, ditch the wipes, juice and just buy whatever fruit is in season, maybe save a fiver a week but go swimming and soft play, you won't get these years back and it's nice for you to get together with the other mums, being a sahm does ran some sacrifices in other areas but I used to have a competition with myself how low I could get the weekly bill, good luck and let us know how you get on

VictorineMeurent · 08/02/2015 13:31

Don't know if its been sugggested but I save up for special meals out by shopping every 8 days instead of 7. It is not difficult to make something on the last day out of leftovers etc. and there is hardly any waste now.

OnlyLovers · 08/02/2015 13:35

I would ditch the fresh fruit, or at least the more expensive things like blueberries, and buy more fresh vegetables instead; they're cheaper and, IMO anyway, more nutritious. I think fruit is mostly sugar.

Along the same lines, I wouldn't buy fruit juice or, if you all really want to keep drinking something like that, find a nice squash instead.

I'd buy ordinary rice rather than microwave.

And I'd ditch some or all of the nachos, multi pack crisps and cookies/biscuits. Or was this a one-off for a party or something? Sorry if so; but if you're looking to save money I think that's quite a lot of snack stuff that you could do without and that isn't terribly cheap.

Littlef00t · 08/02/2015 13:41

I'd like to recommend reusable baby wipes. You can go on cheeky wipes website for an idea, but you can easily replicate with small face cloths, Tupperware and essential oils.

With one still presumably in nappies, and another on the way, when you're at home they are easy to use and wash with everything else. I still use normal ones when out and about.

They are also fab for weaning.

NancyJones · 08/02/2015 13:44

As I said, we're not struggling but ds3 has really only ever had hand me down clothes and lots of hand me down shoes. That's what happens when you have older family members if the same sex surely?

katienana · 08/02/2015 13:49

Nothing wrong with wanting to do some different activities. ds and I do playgroup on Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Tuesday he goes to nursery and Thursday we do little kickers. I would like to find another activity to replace Monday playgroup just to add more variety. nothing wrong with wanting to do fun stuff with your kids.

DarkHeart · 08/02/2015 13:56

I think it is very do-able to spend £60-70 a week on food. Also second the swim membership or local gym as often under 5s are free and our local one has a pool and soft play. Also does your local library offer story time, singing or craft sessions?

specialsubject · 08/02/2015 14:06

no food is unhealthy per se, with three exceptions:

cola drinks - toilet cleaner
crisps - wasteful bags of fat and air
cereal bars - very high sugar content.

so lose those. Too much sugary juice too. Generally food labelled as 'healthy' is a con. Real good food isn't labelled.

BTW if you have a front door and a park nearby (even better if it has a playground) then you have lots of free soft play. Just hose down child afterwards.

Blondie1984 · 08/02/2015 14:09

What do you buy each week? Can you break that £80 down a bit for us?

Blondie1984 · 08/02/2015 14:11

Sorry missed the page with that on

Iggly · 08/02/2015 14:12

You're not spending £80 a week on food - you're spending that on nappies and other stuff too.

When dd2 arrives you'll have more nappies to buy....

If you've got hard water, you can use soda crystals with washing powder to help.

Don't buy ready meals.

Can you get a job at some point in the future?

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