to not want to kiss my friends everytime we meet.

[carlajean]

I love my friends, but feel as though we've got into a ritual of kissing on the cheek, either one side, or both, (or even 3 times) everytime we meet and leave each other. Then, if there's some one else with them, I end up doing the same with them, so they don't feel left out and it ends up a whole mhwah mhwah session. Plus I don't want to kiss everytime.
I guess this makes me a cold fish, but does anyone else feel like this, and just wish that we could go back to saying 'hi'.
(and please don't tell me it's a 1st world problem, I know it is)

If someone tries it on me I just shout "NO TOUCHING" and take a couple of steps back. An accusing glare never goes amiss, either.

I absolutely hate being touched. I don't want anyone hugging or kissing me, but I picked up a great tip on here a while back - someone suggested that if someone is moving in to kiss or hug you, just take half a step back and that can be enough to halt them in their tracks!

ignom Okay I want to try your method now!

wobbly Why would you want to make people uncomfortable deliberately?

Aww, I don't think there is anything wrong with it. I give most of my mates a kiss when meet each other and say goodbye. Wouldn't take offence if anyone didn't want to partake, probably wouldn't instigate actually with someone new.

Ugh, no, YANBU. When did this hug and kiss thing start anyway?

Why not tell your friends that you've been scratching your head & suspect you might have fleas-that should stop them in their tracks
Seriously though, that thought about headlice does cross my mind when someone swoops in for a kiss.

It's a ridiculous MC affectation in this country.

It only works in places where it's the norm and everybody does it and they do it the same way.

Otherwise people are just all over the place.

I have OCD so the idea of kissing anyone who isn't a DP or my parents sets me off massively. I am seriously sweating just thinking about it.

I hate it too.

Mil is always determined to plant a smacker on me and I absolutely cringe. Every time we see them I tell myself to grin and bear it and make an old lady happy and, every time I find myself backing away involuntarily and trying all sorts of ways to avoid it (hiding behind children/animals, holding a hot kettle etc) which she then gets round by taking me by surprise later with "I haven't said hello to you properly yet, Yesterday, mwahhh!"

My late Gran used to try and kiss me on the lips but I would grab her and give her a bear hug instead! Tried this with mil but she's a bit taller than me and surprisingly strong for an 80 year old and she managed to twist her head round and give me a bigger kiss than usual!

I am going to try blowing a kiss at her next time

YANBU. I hate it. I remember when we used to think the French were peculiar with all their kissing - then at some point it crept over The Channel and we're all bloody doing it. (Except me).

My friends joke about me being "frigid" when I back off and give them the glare. But I don't care, as long as they keep their lips to themselves!

I kiss all my friends on both cheeks. So do my parents and their friends. Have since we were teenagers and never thought twice! Oops. However, do not like being introduced to people who ignore my outstretched hand and lunge in for kisses. Definitely inappropriate for a first meeting. (I mean socially by the way-not at work)!

Yesterday my mil does this too, wants to hug goodbye. I've tried everything not to, I've told her directly I HATE HUGS many times. She doesn't care, I wonder if it's a power thing. She doesn't care that I'm uncomfortable and cringing, she likes pissing me off. It gives me the serious creeps.

I like a hug but all our friends do all the 2 or 3 kisses and of course we do it too and have done for years, but frankly, a hug would do me.

Apart from dh and the children, I don't kiss or hug any of my family or in-laws - but friends? It's a bloody kissing fest! 22 of us are going out on Saturday night, we will need to get there early..

Skilled at skiving, is it a meal? Do what I unintentionally did at the weekend, turned up ten mins late, everyone already seated, cheery wave to all, then quickly parked bum and scooted chair in. No kisses, no hugs (although most of my friends know I don't do the touching thing now)

It's bizarre when you think about it, hugging. I like you so I'm going to press my chest on you for a bit. Um, thanks?

Yanbu.

Dp's family all do this. And he's got a lot of brothers and sisters and they all have partners. When we go to his parents I have to kiss about eight people... It's making me feel a bit sick just typing it .

My family aren't big on kisses. We hug but not as often as many people but not kisses. Several of my friends are which is fine they're my friends. It's not when it's when people I don't know well or I've just met (woman I was at a meeting with a week before Christmas I'm looking at you). But it's hard to know where the line is.

I've got used to it but if I'm not sure I go in for a hug and make sure I'm facing out rather than in so no kiss

What country are you guys from and, if the UK, whereabouts? (I'm suspecting this may be a southern thing!). Other than a couple of French friends, I don't know anyone who kisses their friends.

It took me a long time to get used to the kissing when I was in France. Even after a few years it still felt odd to be kissing perfect strangers on the first time you met them.

It isn't consistent either. Some people do two kisses, some people do three kisses, and a few people do four kisses in certain circumstances.

It's so normal for everyone there, but yeah. I never got used to it.

YANBU

I don' think I'm remotely stand-offish, but I do not do hugs or kisses except for DP and the children. If someone goes in for an unexpected cheek kiss I tend to get very stiff and awkward.

Ugh I hate hate hate this! I don't want to have people's bodies pressed against me, their hair (and their smell) up my nose and their mouth on my face! Not unless it's DH or my DC/DGD. It always makes me feel so awkward and inept, like I'm the weird one for not enjoying it. But I'm sure nobody used to do this until about five years ago, now everyone's doing it. If I'd tried to kiss and hug my school mates I'd have got a definite face and probably been accused of being a lesbian to boot. I'm too old to adopt new things - I have enough difficulty adjusting to whatever Cinnamon Grahams are called this week!

I went to a party at in laws' house on New Year's Eve. Absolute nightmare. Kisses and hugs on arrival, kisses and hugs at midnight, kisses and hugs on leaving. If anyone had a bug we'd all have it. Added to which I am disabled and use crutches so when someone hugs me it throws me off balance.

I have not yet found a polite way to repel such attacks. I may try to cultivate a giant cold sore in time for the next party.

I hate it so much. Even before they try to kiss me, they've stepped into my space (imagine me whirling round with my arms stretched out - that circle is MINE! I feel very uncomfortable with anyone inside it. They step forward, I step back. I can't help it.
By the time they're actually leaning in to me, I'm fighting the urge to shove them away.
I don't know why people want to kiss and touch everyone. I wish they'd stop it.
Or at least read the other person and take a second to think about whether they want you in their space.
hint - if they're stepping back-don't step forward again. Abort your Kission. If they stiffen, they don't want you to do what you're doing. Stop it.

I just laugh and say something along the lines of oh, I don't do kisses, I'm weird like that.

I just wish that was respected. It doesn't hurt someone at all not to slobber on me.

Be glad you're not French!