to ask how to dodge this babyshower I've been conned into attending?

[duckduckmoose]

So, I got a text message asking if I'm free on a Saturday night next month. Sadly I am, and replied saying so.

This was my mistake, I should have fished for information as to why they were asking.

Now I've had the response "oh good, bonkers aunt is arranging a baby shower from hell for me and bubs vomit, it's from xxx at xxxx".

I've been suckered in to attending this godawful event by stealth and I'll have to suck it up and go, since I can't actually reply "Oh dear God, no. Why would I want to go to that?!"

Unless anyone can think of a polite way I can dodge it? Rude would be briefly satisfying but I like a quiet life and the fallout wouldn't be worth it.

Could you have a colleague who has German measles?

I would be very tempted to say you aren't coming and when asked why, just say 'Because I don't want to.' If you can't face being that frank to pregzilla then I'd suggest norovirus, as PPs have suggested.