Father turns up drunk at 5 year old daughters birthday party

[BelleBoyd]

So is this as outrageous as I feel it is? My DDs fifth birthday today and my ex turns up late and out of it smelling of alcohol. Spent most of the party looking at his phone and hanging around away from the children. He was slurring and his eyes were drooping.

Why on earth did you allow him in?

Why didn't you tell him to leave?

How awful!

It was at a play centre and he just appeared. I didn't fully realise till I spoke close up to him. I asked him to go for a walk to sober up and I think he did wander off for a while. But to be honest I felt it was better to have him on the outskirts rather than having a big scene and upset DD.

I sincerely hope he hadn't driven there in that state as well!!!

Oh you poor thing, are you okay? Is your dd okay?

Yes you were right. Thank goodness he wasn't driving her home! Really not good. Your poor dd. Would he be drunk in the day when he has her?

Silly question - is your ex your DD's father?

Sillier me - just re-read post title -sorry. He is probably going to feel pretty ashamed when he realised what he has done, be thankful that you did avoid a scene, hopefully your DD didn't realise ..

Well as they say, there's a reason he's your ex...

Is he reasonable and rational enough (when sober) to have a discussion about this?

He hadn't driven but yes he was with her earlier in the day briefly and I suspected he was at least hungover then-was at a playgroup so I felt she was safe.
He is not rational even when sober. He will say he was having a difficult time to excuse any drink/drug taking etc and play the victim. He is DDs father yes.

I'm sorry you are tied to this dick

No advice, but I'm sure you are a fantastic mother and your responsible and loving parenting balances out all his shite.

DD has seen this before a few times and it seems to go over her head thankfully.

Thanks that's kind. I hope I do make up for it a bit but it makes me livid I can't fully protect her.

Well the unfortunate truth is, this is the way it is.

He is her dad. No point expending energy on wishing that wasn't so or that he was different.

And no, you can't fully protect her.

But you can keep on being her rock, her stability and constant who she feel safe an happy with (and believe me when she's older she will know and appreciate that).