My mother has five siblings. Out of the six of them, four have had breast cancer including my mother. One of those siblings is male, and her older sister has had a recurrence.
Mum is being treated in South Africa by a top oncologist (a professor), who said it was quite unusual, and very significant, for one set of siblings to be so affected. Mum has been tested to see if she carries the gene and the result came back negative. Her oncologist thinks the test result is flawed and wants her to repeat it, and he has stressed that my sister and I need to be tested. He is emphatic that there must be a gentic element.
My dad has prostate cancer and is being treated by a different oncologist. My parents spoke to him about Mums test and he agreed with her oncologist and also was apparently very insistent my sister and I should be tested.
So I discussed this with my GP who seemed remarkably unbothered by how many have had it in my family. She told me there was a 'checklist' (not the word she used but what I understood) that needed to be met for me to qualify for testing, including how many close relatives have had cancer.
I got the impression that if my sister got cancer, I'd be tested, but all the aunts and my uncle didn't really count.
My grandmother died of emphysema, so how could I know if she might have eventually got breast cancer, or even if she had it and no one knew because she had a bigger immediate demon to deal with?
But what if I get it before my sister? We have also been warned by mums oncologist that we might be at higher risk for other cancers too. I have two very young DC and I'm in my early 40s so I am worried. I would like to take measures, if need be, to reduce my risk.
GP has deflected my concerns by asking me to find out ages everyone else got it. So I am doing that but I am feeling I'm going to have to make a case, or something.
What would you do in my shoes?