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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that these cancer adverts are too much?

45 replies

FrancesNiadova · 26/01/2015 22:28

I was in the kitchen earlier making a cup of tea; 5 mins max. I came through to the lounge to find my 12 year old, head in his hands, sobbing his heart out. The advert of the man in the snow, to that awful depressing music, had been on.
I have used the MacMillan helpline myself when I was diagnosed with BC 2 years ago. I had a mx, then just over 12 months ago another operation with treatment from Dec-Feb. The adverts are right, the whole family goes through it.
Thankfully I'm NED now & I'm just getting ready to go back to some part time work that's not my old job. A new normal is starting to emerge from the awfulness of the last 3 years.
Sometimes, patients & their families want a night off, an evening to relax & forget the cr@p that they're all going through.
I'm really grateful to BCCUK & MacMillan for their helplines & resources, but for goodness sake, do their adverts have to be so frequent & so bldy depressing!

OP posts:

ifgrandmahadawilly · 27/01/2015 10:54

Yanbu. I've been thinking exactly this recently too. Chistmas was wall to wall cancer adverts. It's exploitative.

rumbleinthrjungle · 27/01/2015 11:03

It's all the charity ads. In the space of five minutes often the same ones over and over in the space of a two hour film, you're blasted with emotionally wrenching cancer charity ads, beaten and abused children, images of starving and dying babies, abused and miserable donkeys, abandoned and abused dogs, all one after the other.

I hate it because I think it trains people to not be shocked by those images and not react to them because it's become so ceaseless and routine. Or else it's so upsetting that you have to learn to block it out or avoid it. Any one of those ads makes me flip the channel or fast forward. And the only way to keep up the shock value year on year is just to make more and more explicitly distressing ads.

chillybits · 27/01/2015 11:07

U2TheEdge - would you mind giving the details of the health anxiety forum you are on. A family member is very badly affected by this and yes these adverts are a source of mental torment for them.

chillybits · 27/01/2015 11:08

U2, ofcourse completely understand if you'd rather not.

TedAndLola · 27/01/2015 11:10

The Cancer Research ones are the worse. I don't understand what good it can do to treat cancer like an animate being who is purposely trying to kill people and ruin all our lives. People who died of cancer have not "lost" a fight, and they didn't die because they didn't try hard enough to live. The language they use is alienating.

engeika · 27/01/2015 12:04

I agree and am so relieved to see that I am not the only one. Was ashamed to say anything for fear of upsetting people.

My favourite uncle dies just before Christmas of a very fast onset cancer. We were subjected to ad after ad. "More people survive"... "Shut up!!! he isn't going to"

"Cancer - we're coming to get you" "Fuck off - there's nothing anyone can do about this"

Yesterday DS was also in tears over the "mutating cigarette" ad. (His father is a smoker), on at about six or seven o'clock I think.

MaidOfStars · 27/01/2015 12:07

I'm not the biggest fan of CRUK, so tend to walk around the room muttering "Fuck off, fuck off" when those are on.

I agree that the constant litany of misery is starting to hack me off, which is a shame, especially if others are feeling the same. Just one ad break can bring me down for a while, and I know that it's more important to fight cancer/help the elderly/save donkeys than preserve my mood, but I just find myself (irrationally) disliking the PR people who make me feel shit.

Beadsbeadsbeads · 27/01/2015 12:10

All these adverts get on my nerves.

The ones that are really irritating me at the moment are the ones that say 'There are 5 symptoms of breast cancer, text us for this free leaflet to find out what they are. If everyone knew what these 5 symptoms where we could save so many more people' or words to that effect.

Why don't they just tell us what the 5 are in the advert then if it's so important? It's the perfect platform after all.

They cynical side of me says that it's because they want you to text in so that they can use your phone number for fundraising purposes. I don't know that's the case of course, but I don't understand why they do it.

Thumbwitch · 27/01/2015 12:16

I'm not in the UK so haven't seen these ads for a few years but they sound horrendous!

We have one here in Australia that really upsets DH - it's for malignant melanoma, and is a public service ad rather than for any support charities, but it's quite hideous in the graphics they use to show melanoma cells breaking away from the primary site and actively invading other areas. DH has had several BCC removed from various areas and is on 3m checks with the skin cancer specialist, but is quite terrified of getting malignant melanoma.

BarbarianMum · 27/01/2015 12:20

I don't like the ads (frequency more than anything) but to berate a charity simultaneously for advertising for funds and but also for not having the resources to help everyone seems deeply unfair.

imgoodatpointless · 27/01/2015 12:23

I'm convinced that a certain celebrety was terrified every time someone died because it would alwauys be

x died today, from cancer, well known for y

i think thats why the cause of death hasnt been released by the family, becuase they dont want to scare anyone with cancer.

RIP

Aussiemum78 · 27/01/2015 12:28

The anti smoking ones are upsetting to those with other types of cancer. There was one here, a man dying in a bed trying to talk to his daughter. Exactly what dp needed to see during his treatment.

As a kid, I was terrified of dying from aids because of the "grim reaper" ads. I wasn't old enough to understand it.

MaidOfStars · 27/01/2015 12:43

imgoodatpointless Baffled by your post. Can you clarify? Are you saying that you believe a recently-dead celebrity died from cancer but the family didn't release those details because it was too scary for the general public?

Sallystyle · 27/01/2015 14:45

Messaged you chillybits ;)

RosyAuroch · 27/01/2015 15:35

Pom Sorry to hear about your friend, has she thought about asking her GP about the possibility of a Marie Curie nurse?
LadieRainicorn Exactly the same with my mum. All sympathy and "why don't you share your feelings with me" and "how is your daughter coping" and very little real info or help.

OP, I agree. I think the adverts turn on the emotional manipulation far too much. If there is some info on early detection, that's useful, fair enough. The others are really, really emotionally manipulative to get you to part with your cash. They also really overplay the part the charity plays in helping with treatments or research in many cases I think- I used to work in the fundraising sector and how much actually gets spent/achieved varies hugely. They really don't think about the effect on people living with cancer, cancer survivors or relatives.

Rinoachicken · 27/01/2015 16:49

DS1 keeps parroting ones he's heard on the radio:

"Blood in your wee?"

Usually in publicly embarrassing places!

imgoodatpointless · 27/01/2015 20:54

I mean a well known celebrity has died. She had cancer a while ago. the family did not release the cause of death.

IMHO having had a family member with cancer and hearing people dying from it all the time....Its all you hear on the news... x has died from cancer, y has died from cancer. not just once but on every news flash

when you have it and everyone around you is dying from it must be terrifying.

so they have decided not to release the reason why the celebrity has died because she didn't want to terrify anyone else with the disease.

BUT that's just my opinion. (i know nothing)

Happynapi · 27/01/2015 22:43

Totally agree with what has already been said especially fact that if you have any symptoms it can often be a struggle for lots of people to get a doctor's appointment and referral. Also almost smiled at the poster whose father started adding up the cost of how much they could have ended up donating from the christmas adverts as thats what my teen started thinking about doing just to see. Sad

Archiesnan · 27/01/2015 22:59

I also hate the adverts. It's my dad's funeral on Thursday, every time the adverts cone on my stomach just sinks and I want to cry. They are on far too often. We were also very dissatisfied with McMillan.

Original poster

FrancesNiadova · 28/01/2015 08:24

So sorry to hear your news Archiesnan.

I think that I'm going to write to my MP about it. Yesterday, during A Place in the Sun (), they were on during every set of adverts. The one about children and cancer was dreadful, I filled up & was so relieved that my DS had just walked out of the kitchen.

OP posts:

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