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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

"Social selling"

25 replies

crapcrapcrapcarp · 25/01/2015 09:30

I have a couple of Facebook friends who do this.

One of them has a separate group which she invited her friends to, she only posts on there, not her main page, and infrequently. I would go there if I wanted to buy her stuff. It is unobtrusive.

The other has been totally consumed by it, everything she posts has some sort of tagline regarding her products, whether it's a status about what to have for dinner or a selfie of her with some overpriced junk.

I know, I know, that this is how social selling works, by infiltrating people's social groups and making sales by taking advantage of people's feeling of obligation. But AIBU to think that it's a horribly cynical and unpleasant thing to pollute your friends' news feeds with?

I know I could unfriend btw but it's one of the few ways I kept up with this friend and I'd be sad to essentially cut contact because of it. That's what makes me so about the whole thing I guess.

OP posts:

ItsAllKickingOffPru · 25/01/2015 09:38

Could you Hide her and remember to look at her Wall once a week to keep up with any news that isn't relentlessly pushing tat?

Original poster

crapcrapcrapcarp · 25/01/2015 09:51

Yeah, I could unfollow her I guess. I suppose I just feel aggrieved that I have to. It feels like she's taking advantage of her role as a friend.

OP posts:

Branleuse · 25/01/2015 09:54

well its only her facebook, if its the only way you keep on touch then at least you dont have to worry about her nipping to your house constantly with car loads of tat shes trying to flog

GnomeDePlume · 25/01/2015 09:55

I think this has always been the case with this type of selling. They get a little bit brainwashed. These companies convince their sales teams that what they are doing is okay. Possibly even good as it allows family & friends to enjoy the benefits of the amazing products or services.

I remember relatives getting involved in one of the selling schemes and them being totally consumed by it. We got to the point where we didnt want to visit as they would spend so much time going on about the company, the products, company events. Far more than people talk about 'normal' jobs.

This becomes the problem as of course soon the sales person has used up the goodwill of family & friends and will often find themselves dropped for a while.

Original poster

crapcrapcrapcarp · 25/01/2015 09:57

Bran

OP posts:

FunkyPeacock · 25/01/2015 09:58

YANBU
I have a FB friend (who I really like IRL as a person) but she insists on posting 'special offers' for the products she sells (Temple Spa) and tagging all her friends into so it ends up on their timeline too

It makes me really uncomfortable and if she wasn't otherwise a lovely person I would have unfriended her long ago!

SnowWhiteAteTheApple · 25/01/2015 10:03

An old work colleague does this on FB and it's very annoying. Without the earnings she would need to go back full time but pestering friends daily isn't what you do.

PtolemysNeedle · 25/01/2015 10:05

Unfollow her so that you can still keep in touch and look on her page when you want to but then don't have to see all the rubbish she posts on your feed.

I get that it's frustrating and you feel you shouldn't have to do that, but it's just one of the downsides to choosing to be involved in social media. You can't choose what other people post.

Pickle131 · 25/01/2015 10:26

If you are in the mobile app there's a right drop down arrow that says 'hide this post' and if you click on that it gives you the option to 'see fewer posts from ', which I used on someone who was getting a bit over-posty... YANBU

Jackieharris · 25/01/2015 10:38

Unfollow

ItsAllKickingOffPru · 25/01/2015 17:28

Yeah, Gnome, we have a relative like that. I won't even Friend him on FB because of it.

Love 'over-posty'

SolidGoldBrass · 25/01/2015 18:10

It's difficult because a lot of the people who are on these selling schemes are desperate, which is why they are so pushy. The profit margin for the seller on whatever type of crap it is (make up, kitchenware, woo-juice, whatever) usually isn't very much, and because it's a pyramid scheme, sellers are often being harassed and pressurized to annoy everyone they know almost constantly.

People who have got their own product/service to sell (eg artists/authors/cake makers) can sometimes overdo it on social media as well, though generally not as much.

flimmyflam · 25/01/2015 18:33

There was a fascinating episode of This American Life (a syndicated radio show in the States) about this phenomenon recently. It suggested that some of these companies are essentially cults, with the prospect of great wealth and entrepreneurial success replacing more traditional religious mythology. I don't really know what to suggest about your friend, but you might find the show interesting.
www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/543/wake-up-now

MrsTawdry · 25/01/2015 18:37

It's a great shame when a good friend does this...my friend has run a very successful beauty salon for ten years but for some reason has begun peddling a line of shit makeup and it's really making her business look bad.

bumbleymummy · 25/01/2015 18:38

Eugh - I can't stand this either. I have a friend on FB like this. Drives me crazy - nearly every single post has something to do with her products.

GnomeDePlume · 25/01/2015 18:41

It is sad because with the selling schemes they can get a bit cult-like.

In the end you have to decide how much of a friend you are.

You cant point out how crap the products are as that is deemed unacceptable because of course the products are superior to anything else available. Which is why they can only be sold by poor deluded saps to their increasingly fed up family & friends.

All you can do is stand back and wait for the madness to pass.

fishybits · 25/01/2015 18:52

I think it all depends how the product is "peddled".

I sell for a firm but don't talk about it to any of my friends or stick anything to do with it on my personal FB account. I have a FB page dedicated to it instead which friends are perfectly capable of liking if they want to keep up to date or not as the case may be. It took some effort but I did manage to get a decent business going outside my circle of friends.

I move homes every couple of years so have no interest in recruiting a team and just sell for pocket money and the shows are fun to do. Once my "up line" had worked out that no meant no, I got left alone.I can see how some companies could seem a little cult like though.

forcryingoutloud111 · 25/01/2015 18:53

ItsAllKickingOffPru · 25/01/2015 19:01

You're selling biscuits, crying?

Am I locked into a minimum order for those or can I just get a single packet with no future obligation?

kavv0809 · 25/01/2015 19:03

Love 'woo juice'!

justmyview · 25/01/2015 19:04

On that theme - I receive frequent invitations to "come and look, no obligation, I do it in my own home so that you can enjoy a night out". I went first time I was invited, to be polite / supportive. Host did quite nicely out of it. 6 guests each brought a bottle of wine. We were offered one glass of wine each and all felt under pressure to buy goods. I haven't gone again

FarFromAnyRoad · 25/01/2015 19:11

I'd sooner eat my own hair than go to a sales 'party' at someone's house. It's always overpriced shite.
At least with FB you can choose not to see it. I had a friend who went doolally-tap with that Clean9 bollocks but she's gone real quiet lately so I guess she found out that she was sold a pup.

RonaldMcDonald · 25/01/2015 19:12

I'd go to a tupperware party if we all got to dress up a la The good Life and ate cheese and pineapple on a stick

ItsAllKickingOffPru · 25/01/2015 19:24

My friend did that for an overpriced kitchen utensil scheme party, Ronald. It really didn't make the prices any more palatable.

GnomeDePlume · 25/01/2015 20:04

Interesting x-post flimmyflam, I have started listening to the program you linked to. What it describes is very similar to what my relatives were involved in.

They tried to rope us in. There was a recorded presentation we were given to listen to. We duly listened but there was no mention of the product. The way the whole thing was sold the product was irrelevant, it was just there to keep the scheme legal.

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