to have been annoyed at dp?

[ginmakesitallok]

Out today with our 2 DDS. Dd2 (5) needs a wee, so I suggest dp takes her and dd1 and I pop into a clothes shop. Off they go. Dd1 and I spend 5 mins in shop and the go to meet dp and dd2 at the loos. Dp is standing outside, he's let dd2 (5) go into the ladies herself. I go in and find her in a cubicle with the for open not able to flush the toilet.

Dp days she wouldn't do to the men's with him. There was an empty family cubicle. Wibu to be pissed off with him???

Door open, not for open!

YANBU. I would have chopped DH's balls off!

She's 5,? of course he should do the family toilet? was it owt for the easiest or general ignorance?

He thought she'd be fine. He doesn't think he did anything wrong. There was a queue ffs! Dd2 doesn't do queues! I got a few weird looks when I cut the queue to get to her. I feel that he doesn't understand why I was cross.

I'd be telling him to parent-up, she's FIVE she does as she's told. End of.

As for going into the toilets by herself, just depends. However, if there was a family option then I don't see any reasonable reason not to have used that.

His other option would have been to come back to the shop, 1 minute from the toilets, and get me too go with her.

My DD has been going to the ladies by herself since she was 5.

He was waiting right outside.

What is the big deal?

This definitely falls under "let him parent his own child" IMO.

Big deal was that she had a wee in full view of a queue of other folk and was getting upset that she couldn't flush the toilet. Big deal was that he wasn't actually parenting his own child at that point, he was just taking the easy option, not thinking and calmly waiting outside.

He was "parenting" her - he was trusting her to be independent and try something she wanted to do on her own and that is pretty standard for a child of her age.

Yes, and on this occasion I think he misjudged it. We do let her go to the toilet by herself, but generally in a restaurant or somewhere where she's straight in and out, or where she's with her sister. She's not quite ready to cope with a big shopping centre toilets.

And what "parenting" was he doing?? I could have pointed her in the direction of the toilets myself. Should I be grateful he waited outside?

I have to say as the mother of three girls it wouldn't occur to me for a second to not be the one to take them to the loo in public when it's so much easier for me to go into the same sex toilet with them.

If we had sons, I'd expect DP to do the same.

You think he misjudged it, OK.

But as parents we misjudge things all the time.

I'd be pretty pissed off with DH if he was carrying on the way you are because I let my daughter use the ladies by herself.

He made a call. You would have made a different one.

Nothing bad happened.

The end.

What do you want from him?

I just want him to say "fair enough, she didn't copr very well this time". I'm not " carrying-on," at all. He doesn't know I'm still annoyed. I know it's not the parenting crime of the century, that's e why I wonder whether or no iwbu.