Worried about social media and DDs.

[MrsTawdry]

My DDs are 10 and 6...DD who is 10 is in year 6 of primary....the youngest in the year and I feel anxious about her and social media.

She's not shown any interest in it as of yet but my sister's DD is 11 in year 6 of another school and has a FB account. From what I can see, she conducts her social life through it and very publicly.

In this week's school newsletter from my DDs school there was a note to say that some of the "Older pupils" had been using social media and could parents please keep an eye on it as there were problems stemming from it which were coming into school.

I feel anxious that DD isn't interested in it and horrified at the thought of her EVERY getting interested in it!

She has a phone and a tablet...on her phone are only her ve closest friends...and she occasionally texts them and they also Skype together after school.

That's the extend of her online socialising.

Is it ok? When should children be allowed to use social media? DD is such a young ten that I really can't see her either wanting to or being ready to until she's about 13 or so.

I HATE it. I hate the fact that social media is full of dodgyness and also that so much bullying etc goes on through it. :(

AIBU to not want DD to ever get onto it? Or at least to delay it?

MrsTawdry I'm taking a similar approach to it than my Grandparents did with The Internet when I was young - let them use it, but make sure I have the most control.

I think, and I don't mean it to sound horrid, but the difference between my DDs and some of their friends is that we don't just let them have free reign. They are absolutely not allowed online in their rooms, it means when they see one girl from school posting something mean to another the OTT reaction of "OMG did you SEE that..." is something their Dad and I see so can keep an eye on it and be aware of it and talk about it. One parent I know doesn't check her daughter's FB account because it would be a 'gross invasion of her privacy' - she's 10!

Also I remind them every week! They do roll their eyes and remind me that I told them that last week, but it keeps it fresh in their minds.

LaLyra I agree that it's scary how much some parents allow their DC to run around the internet un checked...my sister is a case in point. Her 11 year old is posting stuff from very inapropriate sites which she shares on FB!

My sister readily admits that she doesn't check up too.

I don't understand the logic. Some of the strictest parents I know in terms of curfews, how far from home they are allowed to wander etc are just allowed free reign online! Just bizarre.

Thanks for linking to my blog, Euphemia.

My DC are 10 and 12yrs and have social media accounts - Instagram, Pinterest and YouTube, but set up via email accounts that I monitor and I check them regularly. I would not yet let them on Snapchat, Twitter, Reddit and some other sites. DD uses them more than DS at the moment (aside from YouTube).

I don't agree that you should wait till they are 13yrs old, because by that time they will have seen much worse things than IG on the phones of kids at school. They do need to be taught how to use these services responsibly.

My approach has always been to talk to them openly about what kind of things they might see, or be shown by others, and ensure they know how to block/report anything that upsets them.

I showed my DD (12yrs) the NSPCC video and she was quite scathing about it. 'EVERYONE knows not to put pictures like that online!'. I know that this, and bullying/grooming is what most parents worry about, but my bigger worry is what kids share - not intimate stuff, but just plain daft stuff that would be better kept to themselves.

The kind of thing that for a 12 yr old would mean a couple of friend laugh at you, but when you are 16 or 17yrs and applying for jobs/college course, could actually be harmful.

Mme Is that blog yours!? It's very good...lovely and clear.

I'd NEVER let my DC on Reddit whilst they're so young! It's full of the most disturbing stuff...I actually spoke to some of the younger Redditors about this and their re

If this is inappropriate, please let me know and I'll ask for it to be deleted

But I've started a new business and part of my remit is teaching children and their parents to be safe on social media. If you'd like to read something I wrote on it, please PM me and I'll sent a link to it

Mine use social media but don't seem to feel the need to document their every thought on FB or Twitter. The general rule with anything posted on FB etc is assume your aged grandmother and any future employers can read it.

And they do roam the internet (including Reddit, TUMBLR, Deviant Art and any other sites they want to visit) unchecked and unfettered by parental controls.

MrsT
Yes, its my blog. Thank you - I am on a bit of a mission to be positive about social media, while warning of the dangers. Our kids are growing up with this technology, and will need to know how to use it well. I

I compare it to teaching your kids to cross the road - at first with supervision, and then gradually giving them more autonomy.