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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not let my DD have ice cream

74 replies

missbridget00 · 13/01/2015 11:28

We were at a birthday party recently and I declined the offer for my daughter (nearly 2 years) and niece (nearly five) to have Fab ice lolly... All the other kids were eating them but I think they are too toxic for toddlers and kids to handle. I'm worried they'll go hyper and develop a taste for lots of sugar...
I'd love to see them happy with a yummy treat but I'm too worried about the ingredients....
-> Am I being too sensitive (I am a first time mother)?
-> Does anyone know of any organic ice creams that are OK for kids?

OP posts:
Fudgeface123 · 13/01/2015 11:30

Poor kids, it's was a one off at a party. I bet they felt really shit being the only ones not having a bloody ice lolly.

Chill out

PatriciaHolm · 13/01/2015 11:30

First post? Welcome to AIBU....

Babiecakes11 · 13/01/2015 11:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CheeseandPickledOnion · 13/01/2015 11:32

YABU. It's one lolly!

museumum · 13/01/2015 11:33

Do you actually know the ingredients of a fab ice lolly?

And while there are many lovely organic ice creams, I very much doubt they have any less sugar, possibly more if they don't have the fruit flavours.

IAmAPaleontologist · 13/01/2015 11:35

The occasional ice cream will do no harm at all. However, if you don't like the idea of bought ones you can get some ice lolly moulds to make your own from fresh juices, frozen yoghurt with fruit in etc. i like silicone ones line tubes as you can fill them, stick the lid on amd chuck in freezer without having to be careful not to spill.

Nocturne123 · 13/01/2015 11:36

Yabu , agree with previous posters . Must have made poor kids feel crap

ilovesooty · 13/01/2015 11:36

Poor kids. I bet that was fun for them. Not.

SunnyBaudelaire · 13/01/2015 11:38

aww poor kids get them a mini milk

RiverTam · 13/01/2015 11:38

as a special treat they're fine, you don't have to ever get them yourself if you don't want, and one Fab won't cause them to have a lifelong addiction to sugar. I don't buy them just because they look vile.

HoggleHoggle · 13/01/2015 11:39

I'm also careful about sugar with my ds but in this instance I think yabu.

I don't think one lolly at a party will give a child a sugar addiction and in any case it's a parent's job to manage requests for treats - I don't think it's realistic that a child never has sugar therefore avoiding this issue. Allowing them periodic treats will give them happiness and also the ability to know that some things are lovely to eat, but are only for 'sometimes'. It's a skill they need to know so that they don't go crackers with food later on in life.

QueenofKelsingra · 13/01/2015 11:40

once mine were old enough to ask for a treat and understand what they were asking for (about 2yrs old) they have been allowed treats at parties/special occasions.

I wouldn't give it to a baby who doesn't know what it is and would be just as happy with a 'healthier' treat but I wouldn't stop a child from joining in with everyone else.

YABU and PFBish!

RiverTam · 13/01/2015 11:40

I don't buy all this 'they must have felt crap', poor kids stuff, the younger one probably barely registered it and the older one would be perfectly easy to distract. DD doesn't have Haribo (as they're not veggie but she doesn't like them anyway) and she's never bothered at a party. Being denied a Fab is going to cause no more lasting damage than having one!

Pico2 · 13/01/2015 11:41

Do you know what toxic means?

Dinosaursdontgrowontrees · 13/01/2015 11:44

Oh dear op. How did the children react? It wouldn't of gone down well with any nearly 5yr old I've ever met!
The occasional Fab lolly is not going to hurt them. You need to loosen up!

Aherdofmims · 13/01/2015 11:45

YABU. Especially re dn who is 5 and must know all about how lovely they are!

Dinosaursdontgrowontrees · 13/01/2015 11:46

Really want a Fab now.. Yum!

Innocuoususername · 13/01/2015 11:46

YABU. Have you heard of forbidden fruit OP? By banning stuff you only make it more desirable.

DC1 didn't have refined sugar until he was 1, DC2 at 7 mo gets what her brother gets (more or less). No Haribo or anything like that, but the odd biscuit, bit of cake, and in summer the odd ice cream. In the week pudding is yoghurt or fruit, if we go out or have guests they might get ice cream.

I really don't think it is good to get into a situation where some foods are "good" and others are "bad". It sets you up for eating issues later on. Food is never a reward in this house, and while really sugary stuff is not on the weekly menu I wouldn't ban it in a party context.

TheFriar · 13/01/2015 11:46

Well I'm not keen on ice cream to say the least. We more or less never have any at home. I will even avoid them when we are out and about.
My dcs are older and know I am against them so sort of accept it.

But even I would let my dcs have one at a party.

I'm Confused at your question about organic ice cream. Organic it not surely they are full of sugar too??
If you are worried about the ingredients, educate yourself about them first. And ask yourself if they are not still ok a few times in the year. (I suspect that the ingredients you are fearing so much are also in a lot if other stuff. So unless you are giving them only fully home made meals, biscuits, no sweets what so ever, no crips etc... They are likely to eat a lot of those already).

You till need to find a balance between you wanting them to eat healthy foods and keeping a sense of fun and being able to socialise with their friends instead of being the odd one out.

Nocturne123 · 13/01/2015 11:47

River, never felt excluded when you were a kid ? Being the only one ( or two in this case) not allowed something doesn't feel great.

Yes obviously causes no lasting damage but as an odd treat it's not harmful and maybe saves some hurt feelings .

But each to their own , I'd rather regulate sugar at home so my own can enjoy the odd treat when they're out .

FightOrFlight · 13/01/2015 11:48

Rivertam Some Haribo are veggie Grin

OP YABU they must have felt left out, they don't understand your paranoia reasons for not letting them have the same treat as their friends. Is it even upt to you to decide what your niece eats?

fecking LOVES Fab lollies

goshdarnit · 13/01/2015 11:48

As a child who was denied sweets as they were 'unhealthy and bad' for me, I got round it aged 11 by stealing money from Dad's change purse and gorging on sweets. I am still a bit obsessive about them now, and I think that is a result of that denial as a child.

One fab lolly does not lead to an enslavement to sugar, but moderation in all things is a far more healthy and rounded approach. I have allowed my two treats and sweets, but not to excess, and they will happily choose fruit for a snack, even as teens.

lljkk · 13/01/2015 11:52

Check this out, missbridget.

formerbabe · 13/01/2015 11:52

As a child who was denied sweets as they were 'unhealthy and bad' for me, I got round it aged 11 by stealing money from Dad's change purse and gorging on sweets. I am still a bit obsessive about them now, and I think that is a result of that denial as a child.

Yep I did the same thing! Once I got 'puppy fat' treats were no longer in the house...like goshdarnit I would take my dads change and binge on sweets. My cousins however had kitchen cupboards packed with treats and barely bothered with them.

Onsera3 · 13/01/2015 11:52

Hmm YABU - it's a party.

We don't really keep foods with sugar and or e numbers etc in the house but my 2yo can have these as treats out of the house. So he knows they are just that- holiday, party foods etc. He knows crisps are just for weekends for example.

Re the ice cream for home Booja Booja do fab ones you can get from Waitrose or Ocado. The choc one is made from water, cashews, agave and cocoa.

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