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AIBU?

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Original poster

To lock the car doors in a crowd?

105 replies

ShatterResistant · 10/01/2015 19:26

Please help me settle a "discussion" with DH. We were driving home this afternoon, in the dark, with 2 under 2 in the back. On the way, we passed a football ground, just as the crowd were coming out after the game. The traffic slowed right down, as there were people all over the road, although they weren't rowdy at all. I instinctively leaned down to push the central locking button, and DH said, what are you doing? When I explained that I was locking the doors, just in case, he didn't get it at all, and said I was being paranoid. Was I? I mean, in case of what, I don't suppose I really know. Car jacking? Opportunistic baby kidnapping? Very unlikely, I know, but POSSIBLE, right?! I should add, I'm not generally paranoid, and it's not something he habitually accuses me of. Also, he is a football fan, so I think he thought I was doubting his people, but I would do it in any crowd. So, who is right?!

OP posts:
weeblueberry · 10/01/2015 20:29

My car auto locks too but if it didn't I would make a point of locking them. Particularly because we have a skoda octavia which are commonly used as private taxis and I wouldn't be surprised if a drunk person tried to get in at the lights...

Anticyclone · 10/01/2015 20:32

Some food for thought for you all:

Last year I was walking to work when I saw a car which had crashed head on into something up ahead. The driver was slumped over the steering wheel clearly unconscious, or perhaps worse. There was a large group of people trying to get into the car to help the driver, but the doors were clearly locked. They were trying to smash the windows, but without specialist equipment, they were struggling. One man tried to kick them, another tried using an umbrella! I didn't stay as I couldn't help either, but in the 5 mins I watched, the driver was trapped without anyone able to reach them.

I hoped a fire engine arrived soon after I left, but I never found out.

DiscoDancer · 10/01/2015 20:33

I always drive with central locking on. Makes me feel safer. Doesn't matter where I am.

ZombieApocalypse · 10/01/2015 20:34

Not BU at all. Even DH adjusts his central locking so it locks as you move off. I lock my doors too and I'm way less nervous about stuff than DH.

Andrewofgg · 10/01/2015 20:38

Lock it and ignore him.

Plomino · 10/01/2015 20:46

Having had someone try and carjack me - screaming 'get out the car , get out the fucking car' whilst trying to drag me out forcibly , hell yes I always lock my doors . The car I have now automatically does it , but also seems to unlock on impact too . I don't know whether that's by design though !

fluffymouse · 10/01/2015 20:47

Car jacking is very rare now.

I never lock my car doors when driving, even when going through Tottenham. I didn't realise people did.

GreenShadow · 10/01/2015 20:48

It would never occur to me to lock the doors when I'm driving but then maybe the fact that I live in a small town rather than a city has some bearing.

Like one or two others above, I've always been told to leave them unlocked in case of accident.

Charlieboo30 · 10/01/2015 20:48

I'm torn on this one. I do lock my doors as I quite often drive on my own but I worry about it from an accident POV.

Fifteen years ago, a family friend died in a horrific car accident. She hit a tree and the car set alight. Passers by tried to get her out but couldn't because... she'd locked the doors.

As another poster pointed out, by the time emergency services arrive with specialist cutting gear, it may well be too late.

hiccupgirl · 10/01/2015 20:52

I always lock the doors when I'm in the car on my own or just with DS. If DH is in too then I don't always lock then in my car, but his car automatically locks the doors above 5mph anyway.

I do worry about what would happen in an accident but I don't like the idea that someone could just open the doors when we stop at traffic lights etc.

NeedaDiscoNap · 10/01/2015 20:54

I always lock the doors, often before I've even left my driveway. I'm very paranoid about it after a horrible experience a few years ago when I witnessed something that could have been prevented by door locking.

However I do worry now about the accident aspect having read some of the posts.

Clobbered · 10/01/2015 21:00

Don't automatic locks unlock in the event of an accident / when airbags are triggered? I'm pretty sure that is the case. What's the chance of having a serious accident under the circumstances you describe - slow moving traffic? I'd certainly lock the doors in a crowd. Even if it was just a bit of lads-messing-about, opening the door to shout something or chuck rubbish etc, you can do without it. If it happens again, just say something like "I feel safer with the doors locked" - he can't really argue against that, unless he's a complete knob.

weeblueberry · 10/01/2015 21:14

Our car has a safety feature where, if the airbags deploy, the doors unlock (and the phone rings 999 if you're connected via Bluetooth) so I assume this will become fairly commonplace if accessing passengers in an emergency becomes an issue.

Original poster
ShatterResistant · 10/01/2015 21:17

Oh no, clobbered, he wouldn't argue! I'm surprised he's reacted like this, tbh. He's usually very hot on personal safety where the children and I are concerned. In a couple of day he's bound to back down (with no inherent admission of wrongness, you understand.)

OP posts:
crumblebumblebee · 10/01/2015 21:30

YANBU. I have my doors locked in all towns and cities. I only have them unlocked when I'm on fast roads.

Chesterado · 10/01/2015 21:33

I always do this after a lady accidentally tried to get into the back of my car by mistake (stopped at lights and in same type of car as her husband) and scared the hell out of me!

NorbertDentressangle · 10/01/2015 21:39

YANBU - if you feel uncomfortable then lock the doors.

My car locks automatically once you go over 5mph.

However if I get into it at night or in some car parks or locations that I don't feel comfortable with I will lock it as soon as I get in.

I think my main fear in that situation is that someone sees you return to your car, distracted with bags, shopping etc and chooses that moment to open the passenger door and steal your handbag. At night it's the idea of some random drunken arse thinking it's funny to try and get in your car or that you're a taxi or whatever.

FreeWee · 10/01/2015 21:42

People on this thread and my experience too show that people can accidentally get into other people's cars. In a crowd some people are looking for the car which is coming to pick them up. It could be that your car looks like their lift and they try and get in. I've had a man in a petrol station get into the driver's seat of my DH's car while he was inside paying. He was very polite when I suggested he might like to try the car in front. Keeping the doors locked avoids this kind of accidental occurrence which can be unnerving if you're on your own.

TheLondoner22 · 10/01/2015 21:45

I always lock the doors

echt · 10/01/2015 21:50

After a spate of carjacking in London, years ago, I locked the doors and put my handbag in the boot. Still do this.

AgentProvocateur · 10/01/2015 21:58

I never lock my doors when I'm in the car - I saw a film once where the woman drive into a harbour and they couldn't get her out because the doors were locked. I figure the risk of getting carjacked is minuscule (much like then risk of driving into a harbour Wink)

mrsfuzzy · 11/01/2015 00:17

you mention 'doubting his people' i.e fellow footie fans, but their not 'his people' are they ? they are complete strangers to you and as for the crap that 'there would be nowhere for a car jacker to sit' well, assuming you are in the passenger seat, it probably would not take too much effort to drag you out especially if a weapon was produced. i used to football in the past and the crowds can be rowdy and sometimes some of them are drunk,yanbu in locking the doors, best safe than sorry. i certainly would.

Permanentlyexhausted · 11/01/2015 00:22

I drive with the doors locked when it's dark but usually unlocked in the daytime. It's one of those impossible situations though, isn't it. Do you lock the doors to stop thieves and carjackers or leave them open in case you have an accident or end up in the village pond? Like locking the front door at night - do you leave the key in so you can get out if there is a fire or take them out so no-one can reach in through the letterbox and use them to open the door (obviously just better not to have a letterbox where the key can be reached though!).

In the OPs case, I would have locked the doors.

Chips1999 · 11/01/2015 00:32

Our car automatically locks all the doors. I would lock the doors anyway because a friends dad was queuing in traffic in North London and a man just got into his car off the street and asked for money. Luckily I think the man wasn't quite 'with it' as friends dad pushed him out and drove on with no further problems!

PeppermintInfusion · 11/01/2015 10:02

My father (known for his slight paranoia) had locking the doors drummed into me since I started driving. When I met my husband he used to mock me for doing it until his policeman mate said he advises people to do exactly that- due to opportunistic thieves,attackers, harmless but out of it drunks etc.
I used to unlock if I was on the motorway though my current car locks automatically and as pp have said nowadays there are the means for getting you out in an emergency.

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