AIBU to have fallen in love with a crap old house?

[Royalsighness]

has anyone ever had a go at doing up a house in serious need of renovation with a toddler? or whilst pregnant? me and DH have seen a house at a really good price and we need the space with another baby on the way but how stressful is it? The house isnt special to look at but i have fallen for it and can see us being happy there, is that enough to make an otherwise quite risky decision?

We renovated a house a year until ds was 10 was great way to make money and was fun.

Have you never seen Grand designs?

Restoration/building work always takes longer and costs more and is more stressful than people think.

as long as you're realistic about it...

We've been living in ours for 10 years. 2 major refurbs (full rewire, re-roof, floors stripped, full redecoration first time; new kitchen and bathroom second time) both when upduffed/with small people in tow. It wasn't easy. It is beautiful but tbh the maintenance with most old houses is ongoing. Our house will be a "project" till we drop tbh. How old is the house? What exactly needs doing?

I've done it while pg with DC1. But we "cheated" by not living on site during the worst of it, but it was still awful to be Breastfeeding with brickies and sparks everywhere.

We simply couldn't have lived there (no roof, running water and no windows at some points ). Our house was a damp, falling down shell, Grade II Listed. Now it's a beautiful home that I love, but the stress is enormous because you have to be there everyday and it's a huge amount of work and money. It would be too dangerous with babies and young children to live on site if there's anything more than heavy duty redecoration going on.

Depends on your comfort and how much needs doing. I think, if you love this house and would regret not getting it, get it.

YY to:

• The trustworthiness and competence of tradespeople will make or break, so go via word of mouth.
• Everything takes longer and costs more than you'd like to think it would.

I'd also add: budget in some "me/us time". It's easy to get so wrapped up in renovations that you neglect yourself or just having fun from time to time, esp with your wee ones.

We've just moved into a bit of a building site. We [now] have heat and hot water, cooking facilities, a working bathroom, but the only room that's "done" is DS's - we made it a high priority because we thought the move as a whole would be more jolly for him if he had a lovely room to move into, and we thought this would be a sanctuary for him when we do work elsewhere around the house. NB the latter is only a partial success; he still gets lonely and wants to be with us. So, another thing we had to "budget in" was the occasional day out, or playdates with his friends.

He's 4.8 by now, though, so is able to understand that he's not allowed in certain places. Also, he loves helping with things! Especially scraping all the dreadful wood-chip off the walls (and actually he's quite good at that - want to borrow him?)

We always thought our next house would be a fixer-upper - we can't afford otherwise! We love the idea that we're adding the value to the property. So for us, that's the decider, everything else is just what's needed to make it possible. YMMV.

It depends if you're talking fairly superficial redecoration, or gutting and rebuilding internally.

I wouldn't do it in a million years. I'm not a diva by any means but I need a shower, a kitchen and to be dust free. Even ripping out a bathroom and kitchen and having them redone when pregnant with DD1, then in the next house when DD1 was 5 and I was pregnant with DD2 was incredibly stressful. I had great builders, it was all done within a matter of weeks and I was out of the house a lot (working FT) but my god I hated the stress, dirt, lack of facilities and inconvenience. It cost much more than we anticipated and I found it incredibly stressful.

DP has just had his kitchen/diner knocked through and completely refitted - that was hard work and I wasn't even living there!

We did rent a holiday house nearby while the bathroom was done too. It was necessary. At one point it looked like this

we are 16 years into our 5 year plan......house of similar age, needed big refit, but we only did bits we could afford at the time...still ongoing, but one day (when the kids have left home) the house will be lovely!

(dd was 2, ds came along 10 months later, ds2 3 years after that)

Theres a lot you can live with for a year or two!

We did it! DC1 was nearly 2 when we moved and 6 months later I was pregnant with DC2.

It was HARD. I went hammer and tongs when DC1 had his 2 hour nap during the day: painting, removing ancient wallpaper, renovating old dado rails and skirtings, etc... and then DH and I would be working in the evening when he went to bed, having a laugh and a beer (before I was PG).
Our kitchen was a free standing cooker and a couple of ancient wooden cabinets from a junk shop.
Our various builders were all crap, and I spent lots of time on phone complaining, but I was just so happy to have our wonderful house.

We never quite finished before we had to move, but we did make quite a profit when we sold it, and I really enjoyed the whole experience.

Do it, you can take your time if you need to, and you won't regret it!

Can you afford to live somewhere else whilst the main hell (kitchens, bathrooms, flooring, building) goes on?

We bought our 100 year old house while i was pregnant with dd1. It didn't have a bath so we ripped out the 50yo bathroom suite and put one in just before she arrived. I was on a ladder tiling the bathroom at 8.5 months pregnant. Other than that we just did some painting. Then when she was 1 and i was pregnant with dd2 we had a two storey extension. However, we did move out as on day one they demolished the kitchen and boiler and cut off the water. Depending on what you need done i would always recommend moving out for the worst of it. It overran by a month or two though and we had to force them to put the windows in and turn the water on when we had to move back in!

We've just spent 6 weeks doing cosmetic renovations (a bit of building but mainly serious decoration). We did it between working and looking after our toddler hence it taking so long. Was all stuff we needed to do whilst house was empty.

That was tough enough. I was 26-32 weeks pregnant at the time. No way could I have coped with an actual renovation.

Yep - moved into a house that needed major work just before DS was born.

Fond memories of sitting in the stripped bare former kitchen (plastered walls, floorboards) with a chair and a rug because the central heating system was being replaced and that was the only room in the house to have a fire fitted (was being converted to the living room).

Washing up in the bath, cooking on a portable stove etc been there and worn the tee- shirt!

Upshot was it was very challenging but we got through it. I think it depends on if you think the house was worth it. For us it was and whilst the timing was shit, the chance of moving to that location and getting what we wanted in a few years was virtually nil.

My top tip would be to get at least one room finished quickly. We did our bedroom and ensuite (DS was in with us in a cot) as a priority so despite the chaos we had one nice place to retreat to.

Should say I think it would have been harder with a toddler though - at least DS "stayed put" so no major issues about H&S with him free ranging round a building site

When our house renovation looked like Tallalimes we slept in a tent in the garden for six months, though we did have an working bathroom.

I wouldn't have wanted to do it with a baby in tow.

It will cost at least 2 x more than you plan and take 3 x longer and probably never quite get finished.

It depends entirely on what the 'serious need of renovation' entails as far as I'm concerned. (I've done it before and am doing it again, here, bit by bit.) If you're thinking 'I can strip all the doors and skirting boards down to their original wood' then I'd walk away now while you still have your sanity. Otherwise, I'd do what you can afford before you move in to make the place liveable (bar the odd room) and go for it.

I agree with cozie - it really depends on what's absolutely necessary and what can be lived with for a while. What actual state is the house in?

We bought our house for an incredibly cheap price (we bought it three years ago at a price that is about 50k less than the current average for the area, and it's a cheap area!) because it was in poor repair. It needed a new kitchen and bathroom and redecorating from top to bottom as well as extensive work to the front and back gardens. We moved in when DS was 8 months and have since had another. It's been absolutely fine and I'm delighted we did it. It's been slow progress - we still have two rooms to go after three years - but it's been worth it. I have exactly the kitchen I want, we moved the bathroom around to put in a walk in wardrobe in our (now gorgeous) bedroom, everything is how we want it. It was thoroughly exasperating at times, particularly the weeks without a kitchen, but overall I've really enjoyed it and I would definitely do it again. No way could I move into a house and leave it as someone else had it - I think even if our next house were in good nick I would still rip bits out and change things around.

Now the basic building is up to scratch we're talking about loft conversions, new rooms (made out of existing ones that are too big), extensions etc! I think we're a bit addicted

We moved into a wreck when DD was 9 months old. It's hard work but it is doable. But I do remember crying down the phone when the plumbers said they couldn't do the boiler for x weeks - I howled down the phone about having a young baby without hot water or any heating in January. It worked - they came the next day!
And as other posters have said, it was the only way we could afford a decent sized house. I would do it again. Good luck!

We found the toddler aspect fine. You just allocate rooms you'll live/sleep in and stick to them, using stairgates if necessary.

It was more that it ate up huge amounts of money and we struggled to complete the work. We only had a two week gap before we had to move in so I concentrated on one bedroom and one living room and made them habitable.

Then we gradually worked round the house. We never actually finished before the first room needed painting again. The bathroom remains hideous and has been for 8 years now. My resolution this year is to finally finish the bathroom.

But we have a detached house in a nice road near a good school with a garage and a drive. If we hadn't taken this option we'd have had a two up two down terraced house with no parking.

I have. In the middle of it right now. Got three children, 9, 7 and just turned 5 and we are into our 5th month of it, although the end is in sight.
Total refurb and I mean brought back to brick and redone from there. Complete rewire, gas moled in, entire central heating system put in, new windows, ripped out bathrooms kithchen... EVERYTHING.

We got professionals in to do this clearly.

Are you doing it and what is your motivation? How patient are you? Where are you living and if in that house, do you have somewhere else to stay if you do it all at once (faster and overall less intrusive than doing it bit by bit). Think hard...

Yes - there are certain basics that it's far better/cheaper/more efficient to do when the place is empty. The structural stuff, electricity, heating, floor sanding if appropriate etc. If you're so strapped for cash that you're thinking of overtaking those bit by bit, then I'd walk on by.

Forget decorating for the time being - you can live very easily with a patched wall or scuffed but clean skirting boards. You can't live in a house with dodgy electrics or no heating.

Yep , we have done that
It's like child birth , afterwards you blank the pain
Tbh I think our love of the house carried us through iykwim